wonkette says pop, so i win.

You know the age-old debate of pop vs. soda vs. coke? Well, it’s over, because Wonkette says “pop.” See for yourself in this article on the interesting antics of Chuck Stepanek, a former Republican candidate for the Nebraska state legislature:

“According to court records, police say Stepanek drove under the influence of marijuana in Lincoln on May 29, 2007. Police said he was seen naked at a convenience store near South 27th Street buying a pop, then later at the Sid Dillon car lot, before getting into his car again and driving it into a light pole.”

Okay. I maybe just realized that the “pop” comment was actually from a quote from the local Lincoln paper, which makes sense, because Midwesterners and Coloradans like me (who are NOT Midwesterners, thankyouverymuch) tend to say “pop,” you nutty East Coasters tend to say “soda,” and the truly crazy Southerners say “coke” (which must really anger those Pepsi people). So actually this whole post is a big lie.

Still, this debate gets me fired up. I was ecstatic one time when I got to see Joyce Carol Oates read from High Lonesome and she said “pop” instead of “soda” in the excerpt. I was so excited, in fact, that when I went to get my book signed by Oates, I told her that I was thrilled that she said “pop,” and she was all, “Well, yeah, I was trying to make it seemed old-fashioned.” Which does not help my case.

You know what does help my case? This super-scholarly Web site that breaks down the geographic distribution of pop vs. soda vs. coke vs. other. (What could “other” be? Carbonated beverage? Soft drink?) The site’s impressive conclusion at the end of all this is the following:

People who say “Pop” are much, much cooler.

Ha ha! I WIN!

Also, can we talk about how Stepanek got high and then wandered naked into a convenience store? I’m no stranger to spending time in convenience stores (read: 7-Eleven) in an, er, altered state, but naked? I guess I’ll have to work up to that.

[Posted by Mallory]

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