I tuned in to watch the end of the USA v. Canada gold medal hockey game, and while Canada technically won the gold medal, USA totally kicked ass in the Olympic sport of Hot Beards. And hot dudes in general. And hot dudes named Ryan. (Seriously. Like 11 of them are named Ryan.) I present the following evidence:
Ryan Malone of the Tampa Bay Lightning:
Ignoring Malone’s ill-advised tattoos, here’s another one:
His teammate Ryan Kesler, of the Vancouver Canucks, is also my new fake Olympic boyfriend:
Not that I’d turn Sidney Crosby down if he came a-knockin’ at my door. (Is that creepy? How old is he?)
And I swear, I’m not usually this much of a girl. I do like sports for sports, but throw in that many beards and I’m bound to get distracted.
USA! USA! USA!
[Posted by Mallory]