Ashlee Simpson and Pete Wentz had a beautiful, healthy baby boy. And they named him Bronx Mowgli. Yeah, that Mowgli. I’m all for creative names, but I think parents should consider the mockery factor. Ashlee and Pete didn’t seem to do that. Maybe Ashlee is displacing her anger about the misspelling of her own name onto her infant son.
Our Southern belle correspondent tipped us off to this wonderful story, and with the help of Marie Claire UK, we came up with a fun game. You know how you can make up your own porn name or soap opera star name? Well, now you can also make up your own Ashlee Simpson baby name. Here’s the formula:
[One slightly shitty U.S. city + One cartoon animal name]
Here are some examples:
Harlem Tarzan
Compton Simba
Watts Baloo
Scranton Shrek
Our fun new game will sweep the nation. Tell us your favorites in the jump.
UPDATE: FINE, due to some complaints from our favorite readers, let’s change this up a bit:
[One location in the U.S. + One cartoon animal name]
[Posted by Mallory]
six words to change the world. 
i dare you to call scranton a slightly shitty city again.
slight correction… the Bronx & Harlem are not cities. one is a borough of the greatest city in the world, and the other, well… is a blemish on the face of the greatest city in the world. (and happened to be the location for where Clinton chose his foundation’s headquarters? nice choice Billy.)
Anywhooo, as for my child’s name, I think I would go with: Waco Rafiki, or for a girl, the equally lyrical and mildly offensive, Detroit Esmeralda. I would just hope to marry someone with the last name Von Trap.
Wasilla GusGus . . . and I would still plan to marry a Kennedy.
St. Louis Huey?
Have you heard Beckhams’ children names? People are strange.