This has been bothering me for quite some time:
One word for you, Miley: braces.
UPDATE: Instead of braces, did she maybe just get terrible veneers?
WHAT IS HAPPENING HERE?! Anyone?
[Posted by Mallory]
That girl did it again! Miley, why haven’t you learned that Disney stars taking naughty pictures never turns out well? Did Vanessa’s super hot pictures to Zac teach you nothing?! Did your first couple of episodes with naughty pictures teach you nothing?! Well, since you all are a bunch of pervs and it’s kind of funny, here they are– the newest scandalous pictures hacked from sweet, innocent Miley. She’s 15. How those hackers do it, I will never know.
Miley, all I have to say is you are no Annie Liebovitz. Come on! The lighting is ALL wrong. And the poses? A little amateur, don’t you think? What would your best friend Leslie say? (Lame joke, sorry). Mallory and I were talking about this too–where exactly is she? A high school locker room, perhaps?
It must suck growing up and making mistakes when you’re in the limelight, but as our genius president, George W. Bush once remarked, “There’s an old saying in Tennessee – I know it’s in Texas, probably in Tennessee – that says, fool me once – shame on – shame on you. You fool me, you can’t get fooled again.”
That should clear things up for you, M.
[Posted by Kathleen]
Hooker heels for babies? Ha! What will they think of next? I’m currently trying to think of a play on the phrase “baby mama”, but nothing good comes to mind that doesn’t make me feel pervy and like I need to go to confession for just being a bad person. (Catholic guilt will always get you). I could never put a baby in something slutty, but this soulless, pagan, oh-so-cleverly called Heelarious, company has no problem with it. Here is what they have to say for themselves:
“WARNING: May cause extreme smiling and hysterical laughter when in use (this is completely normal).”
The nerve! Clearly, people are screaming left and right about children being pressured to get sexier at a younger age. Hey Miley, good job fueling that fire! You crazy kid!
I say, what the hell, I could have used the practice. That’s a joke people, but then again, so are these heels and I get that. Calm down and don’t get your diapers in a twist.
[Posted by Kathleen]