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reasons why we love making lists.

One time, in a real life professional job interview, I actually uttered the words, “List-making is my jam.” REALLY, MALLORY?! You’ll be shocked to hear that I did not get the job.

But list-making really IS my jam, and I probably wouldn’t be capable of getting anything done if not for my beloved lists. For all you haters out there who’ve ever made fun of my ridiculously detailed lists, or of my love for lists in general, know that I am not alone. Leave it to NPR to intelligently analyze my neuroses. In “10 Reasons Why We Love Making Lists,” Linton Weeks makes a list of ten reasons why we all love making lists. (So meta.) For instance:

6. Making lists can help make you famous. Notable list makers include Thomas Jefferson, Peter Mark Roget, Martha Stewart and Benjamin Franklin. “A methodical and wry man,” wrote Franklin biographer Walter Isaacson in Time magazine, “Franklin loved making lists. He made lists of rules for his tradesmen’s club, of synonyms for being drunk, of maxims for matrimonial happiness and of reasons to choose an older woman as a mistress. Most famously, as a young man, he made a list of personal virtues that he determined should define his life.

Though Mr. Weeks failed to mention this, lists are also great for keeping you busy when you’re really, really bored. Just ask my dear friend Amanda, who made lists of all of her high school teachers and all of the people she’d ever hooked up with while bored without a computer at her internship. (These lists, by the way, did not overlap). Maybe list-making should be EVERYONE’S jam.

P.S. Someone should buy me one of these books. Thanks. 

[Posted by Mallory]

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everybody has seen his teenie weenie.

One time, my roommate painted me naked for one of her art projects. Before you think this is really scandalous, let me clarify- I was wearing a bra and she made up my boobs. (One night, after having a little too much wine, I went on and on about how she painted them saggy. They are, in real life and the painting, anything but. HA!) As part of her project’s theme, she censored my face. The painting was picked up by one of our university’s academic journals, and suddenly, fliers of my body were all around school. Everywhere I looked I saw myself. And even though you couldn’t see my face, I felt like I was in that dream where you are naked in front of the entire school. Because I was. Anyway, that’s a long introduction to what I really want to talk about. Imagine if you were on the cover of an album that represented an entire generation, naked. So basically, naked in front of the entire universe.

Meet Spencer Elden. Well, you’ve already met him. In the quasi-intimate sense. He’s the baby on Nirvana’s famous “Nevermind” album, floating merrily along reaching for that dolla dolla bill, ya’ll.

And NPR (I love love love NPR) did a story on him.

“Quite a few people in the world have seen my penis,” he says from his home in Los Angeles. “So that’s kinda cool. I’m just a normal kid living it up and doing the best I can while I’m here.”

You know what, that is kinda cool. Power to you, man. Wonder what it’s like to be him on a daily basis?

“My friend is all like, ‘Hey I saw you today.’ And I’m like, ‘Dude, I was working all day.’ And he’s like, ‘No, I went to Geffen Records, and you’re on the floor and you’re floating and I stepped on your face. ‘Cause I guess they have like a floating thing where people can like walk on me and stuff … so it’s kinda cool,” he says.

That’s kinda cool too, Spencer. He might just be one of the most non-famous famous kids out there. And he’s kind of kickass. Badass too, because his parents sent him to military school for a bit. Here he is now, all growed up:

Read the piece on this kid. He doesn’t just smell like teen spirit, he reeks of it. Kurt Cobain would be proud, dude.

[Posted by Kathleen]

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