Tag Archives: texas

miss usa crystle stewart wipes out.

Readers, here is something for your Monday morning. Enjoy! Even beauty queens have bad days…

As if the world couldn’t think America was any dumber, we were shamed at the Miss Universe pageant, the Olympics of Beauty, for the second year in a row. Here is what the UK’s Times Online had to say (why are Brits so much funnier even in their news ledes?!):

For the second year in succession, the American entrant in the Miss Universe pageant failed to meet the crucial challenge of walking and smiling at the same time.

Crystle Stewart, from Texas, tripped and fell on stage at the global beauty contest today, just as Miss USA did last year. She failed to make the final, which was won by Miss Venezuela, a former kidnap victim.

Failed to meet the crucial challenge of walking and smiling? HAHA. But seriously, don’t sweat it girl, because you weren’t going to beat a kidnap victim anyway. I mean, COME ON, that’s intense and she deserves to win. Here she is. Rawr.

And I know I said America was shamed earlier, but I was being sarcastic (shocker, I know). I can totally relate to Crystle because I take diggers all the time. So Crystle, I know that you are probably curled up on your bed with tons of decorative pillows, eating full bricks of chocolate and watching Pride and Prejudice (the six A&E hour version) with mascara running down your face but I want you to know it’s going to be okay. You’re still incredibly hot and you still probably want world peace, so get out there and do it. We still love you! And probably didn’t know who you were before this.

[Posted by Kathleen]

2 Comments

Filed under celebrities, news, random, YouTube

john mccain, you silly old man.

McCain

So that I actually feel informed on the seemingly overwhelming world of politics, I have a couple of daily briefings emailed to me. One of these is MSNBC’s First Read. In their afternoon email today, a particular issue caught my eye. McCain (who, according to the above photo, is also an irritating fist-pumper) had scheduled a fundraiser at the home of Texas oil man Clayton Williams, the man who in 1990 said about rape, “It’s like the weather, if it’s inevitable, relax and enjoy it.” Um, yeah. Well even though this was a HUGE issue back in 1990, made national news, and essentially killed Williams’ campaign for governor of Texas, McCain claims that he and his staffers didn’t know about the controversial comment. (More on that here; I’m not the expert, these guys are.) Also, according to MSNBC, “the word ‘rape’ is in the title of the third link that comes up in a ‘Clayton Williams’ Google search.” In McCain’s defense, he’s like 300 years old and is probably still figuring out how to send an email.

[Posted by Mallory]

3 Comments

Filed under politics