Tag Archives: tiger woods

some friendly advice for tiger woods.

During my morning news perusal, I came across a story on the HuffPo about Tiger Woods. First of all, I am SO OVER the Tiger Woods story, but this headline caught my eye: Tiger Woods Parties at Nickelback Concert in Orlando.

Which made me actually exclaim out loud, “does that man have a publicist?!”

Tiger, here’s a little free advice.  If you want to rehab your image and not look like a huge d-bag, going to a Nickelback concert is not the way to go about it. It’s like Jon Gosselin wearing Ed Hardy and trying to rock a faux-hawk. You. Look. Bad.

Take your kids to a Wiggles concert. Move back to your hometown to “rediscover your roots”. Open up a golf course specifically for underprivileged children.

But please, Tiger, stay away from Nickelback. It’s for your own good. Trust me.



[Posted by Kathleen]

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crazy shiz going on with tiger.

As you may have heard, here or elsewhere, Tiger Woods did some naughty things and for a while everyone hated him. Now he is trying to get everyone to love him again. There’s a lot of interesting stuff going on related to that, what with Elin Woods being sort of unreadable and Tiger doing weird shit like making a creepy commercial with the hope that people will forgive him. A few comments about that…

First, a Just Six Words and a Picture submittal from loyal reader Susnan:

Riddle me this: zippers for whaaaat?

Fair question, Susnan. Faaair question. I read an interesting article yesterday about the fact that Elin Woods has been pretty impossible to read these days. She’s always wearing her sunglasses, and she hasn’t quite condemned/all-out ditched Tiger, but she’s also not standing by him. Those crazy Swedes…what ARE they thinking?

But the real question of the week is Who thought this commercial was a good idea?!:

Frankly, I don’t understand. Who sat in on that Nike meeting and was like “OOH, I’ve got it. Let’s have Tiger stare at the camera looking all haggard and pathetic, and we’ll have his DEAD DAD do a voiceover that seems to be questioning this whole affair thing. GENIUS!” And it is genius. If by genius they mean creepy as fuck. I think that no matter what Tiger’s publicity team does for him, he will get back in the nation’s good graces to some extent simply because he’s a good golfer. We are great at ignoring the indiscretions of celebrities, and because he’s had his public flogging, I think things would have gone back to normal either way. So…from my expert standpoint, this commercial was unnecessary (as in won’t help Tiger or Nike all that much), except to give people nightmares. Yay!

With boob zippers on our mind and Tiger’s piercing stare in our hearts, I bid you a happy Friday.

[Posted by Mallory]

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back in colorado for the holidays!

So everybody, guess what? I am officially finished with my second-to-last semester of school ever. (At least, let’s hope it’s for forever.) I am also back in Colorado for the next two weeks, which feels simply wonderful. I suppose I should savor this, because from what I hear, the Real World doesn’t just hand out monthlong winter breaks. Sigh.

Now that I’m at home, I’m doing my best to not launch full-on into lounge mode quiteeee yet. This means that I exercised this morning (!!!), showered, BLOW DRIED MY HAIR, and even put on a bra. The bra might be buried under a few layers of pajamas, but it’s all about the little victories, people.

In honor of not launching into full-on lounge mode, I have decided to set a resolution for myself: I am going to (try to?) post on this here blog every day while I am at home. Hold me to it! The blog has suffered with the onset of a second year of grad school, and that’s not fair to you guys.

Speaking of the blog, I’m working on getting things a little more organized around here. Like, say, posting more regularly in general and rounding up our crew of posters in a more organized way. Details to come on that.

But enough of the housekeeping issues. (Ed Note: It took me like five minutes to think of the phrase “housekeeping issues.”) Can we talk for a minute about Tiger Woods? Because I’m at home, I have had the pleasure of watching a lil daytime teevee today, and that included a trashy show about celebrities called The Insider. On The Insider, they said that it’s been confirmed that Tiger Woods has dallied about with at least 14 mistresses. And to that I say both, “Really, Tiger? Your wife is HOT.” And also, “Can we please stop talking about this now?” I was as interested as the next guy at the beginning of all this — and if you’ve been living under a rock, check out Shan’s original post about Tigergate — but I’m a little over it now. (Though it is incredibly ironic and noteworthy that he’s just been named AP male athlete of the year.) Sure, the dude made a lot of mistakes, but I feel like we are practically stooping to his level if we continue to focus on this. It’s kind of why I didn’t want to post about the Salahis. It’s a different situation, but at a certain point we become part of the problem by feeding into this bullshit.

Tangent (as though these posts are anything but a series of tangents): I just took a break from writing to focus on Bonnie Hunt interviewing Mary Louise Parker, and Mary Louise Parker was talking about adopting a baby and I began sobbing. SHOCKER!

In non-frustrating, non-crying news, watch this video. It combines two of my favorite things: adorable children and Taylor Swift. SOLD!:

Oh my god, right? When I was at the airport last night, I thought I saw this little girl and got SUPER excited for a second. It wasn’t her.

That’s it for today, kids. See you tomorrow!

[Posted by Mallory]


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what’s going on with tiger woods?

This whole possible scandal with Tiger Woods has me scratching my head along with the rest of the world following the story.  And yes, I know, none of this is any of my business and the media probably should give the guy and his family their privacy…but I can’t help but be intrigued.

Here’s the story as it’s being reported: Tiger was leaving his Florida estate at about 3:00 AM on Friday night/Saturday morning when he ran into a tree and a fire hydrant on his neighbor’s property.  At some point, his wife took a golf club to the back of his SUV, allegedly to rescue him from the car because he was knocked unconscious in the wreck.  The airbags of the SUV never deployed.  He was then taken to the hospital with lacerations around his mouth and released in good condition.

Ok, let’s start a list of things that are strange about this story.

1.  Why is Tiger leaving his home at 3:00 in the morning?  While there could be a million logical explanations for this, he hasn’t offered up any so we are left to wonder.  I would conclude he is either sneaking out of his house or he got in a fight with his wife and was bailing.

2.  Apparently, if car airbags don’t deploy, the car probably isn’t going over 30 or so miles per hour.  Do you really think that he would have been knocked unconscious going that slowly?  Maybe, but it seems far fetched to me.

3.  His wife was supposed to have knocked in the back window to rescue her husband.  It seems far more likely to me that she may have been taking out her anger on the back window, especially if the infidelity rumors are true.

4.  Tiger had cuts and lacerations around his mouth.  Again, I’m not an expert, but how do you sustain those types on injuries from a car accident like this?  It makes more sense that those cuts were inflicted by an angry wife.

5.  The Woods family has refused to speak to the police or the media about the incident on several occasions.  The media I completely understand, but the police?  If they have nothing to hide, they’re certainly doing a great job acting like they do.

Tiger’s official statement leaves a lot to be desired for the wondering public.  Tiger basically says he will not speak about the incident beyond the fact that he had a single car accident and his wife acted courageously.  He says all the rumors are irresponsible and untrue.

I sure wish he would elaborate and I imagine this won’t go away unless he does.


Tiger apologized for his wrongdoings on his website without going into specifics.   So it looks like he’s a filthy cheater after all.  Tiger, I expected more from you.

[Posted by Shannon]


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no surprise that mccain lives here…

The price is wrong, bitch

According to the Phoenix Journal/NYT, controversy is erupting in Phoenix over the men’s-only grill at the Phoenix Country Club. There is a separate, far less comfortable dining room for women, and a main dining room for both men and women, but it’s closed between meals. Women can’t grab a beer after a round of golf, or talk to a client over drinks, in either room. (Come on, people, ladies like day drinking too!) Women and men alike have been speaking out against the archaic rule that forbids women from so much as entering the men’s grill, and as a reward for their progressiveness, they’re being harassed:

The targets of [the harassers’] ire were the women, and some men, who have dared to speak up against the club’s policy of forbidding women in the men’s grill room, a center of power dining in Phoenix.

Barbara Van Sittert, one of those women, said her husband, Logan, 73, has been heckled while playing golf and once found his locker defaced.

“They hooted and hollered at him and called his wife a whore,” said Mrs. Van Sittert, 72, a petite, quiet woman with an elegant white bob. “It was not warm and fuzzy.”

Wait, seriously? SERIOUSLY? I suppose I’m not shocked by the rule itself. My family belongs to a country club that still has separate dining rooms, and I’ve always thought that the old-fashioned rules of a country club are a little…extreme (for instance, cell phones are prohibited on the premises of my country club).  But it’s the reaction in this case that really shocks me. That a grown man would deface someone’s locker like an angry 9th-grade boy, or set up a website with the names and numbers of those speaking out against the sexism of the men’s grill (as one member did), is appalling.  

A lawsuit is in the works, but in the meantime,

the club’s board has not found the attention or legal proceedings enchanting. First, it amended its bylaws to state that any member who makes “derogatory or otherwise injurious comments in the media” is subject to suspension and legal fees, and ditto for those who sue. It also warned that spouses of dead members would no longer automatically maintain their privileges.

That’s great, isn’t it? Sorry your spouse died, and please don’t come back to the club again. Lord.

My sister also told me that one of the country clubs in Kansas City, near where she goes to school, still does not accept black members. As in, neither Tiger Woods nor James Blake could join the club.

Just a little something to think about. (Apparently, Saturdays are for anger here at SWTCTW.)

[Posted by Mallory]


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to peace, love, and rocco mediate.

Unlike my father, I am no great lover of golf. True, I did once play on my high school’s golf team, but that was a bit of a joke, and my main memories of that era involve eating a lot of candy and doing things on a golf course that would shame my father. Anyway, perhaps as a tribute to dear ol’ dad, I watched the end of the U.S. Open today. Now I’m the type of person who can very quickly get emotionally involved in a sporting event. I may not know much about Tiger Woods besides that he’s in a lot of commercials and is really, really good at golf, but when they showed dramatic clips from Saturday of him clutching his knee and making those impossible shots, with voiceovers of him talking about his father, I got a little teary. After that clip, however, my heart belonged to Rocco Mediate. With a name like that and a peace sign for a belt buckle, there was no way I could not be in love. And he was so jolly!

As I watched until the nerve-wracking end, I had visions of Rocco celebrating his win, weeping as he hugged and kissed his beautiful wife and children (which of course he has). And on Father’s Day! It would have been beautiful. Instead, Mr. Big Shot just haaaad to make his putt, forcing poor 45-year-old Rocco to play another 18 holes the next day. Although I didn’t know Rocco’s name until earlier today, I found myself borderline depressed when Tiger made that shot and did his irritating fist pump. For the sake of the underdog, peace, and really cool names, I hope Rocco can clinch it. Everyone loves a Cinderella story, especially yours truly.

[Posted by Mallory]

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