some friendly advice for tiger woods.

During my morning news perusal, I came across a story on the HuffPo about Tiger Woods. First of all, I am SO OVER the Tiger Woods story, but this headline caught my eye: Tiger Woods Parties at Nickelback Concert in Orlando.

Which made me actually exclaim out loud, “does that man have a publicist?!”

Tiger, here’s a little free advice.  If you want to rehab your image and not look like a huge d-bag, going to a Nickelback concert is not the way to go about it. It’s like Jon Gosselin wearing Ed Hardy and trying to rock a faux-hawk. You. Look. Bad.

Take your kids to a Wiggles concert. Move back to your hometown to “rediscover your roots”. Open up a golf course specifically for underprivileged children.

But please, Tiger, stay away from Nickelback. It’s for your own good. Trust me.

xoxo,

k

[Posted by Kathleen]

Leave a comment

Filed under celebrities, definitely not politics, humor, music, pictures, pop culture, random, sex, sports, thoughts

my new favorite blog (this week).

So for this past week, I’ve become addicted to a new (to me) blog: http://www.frkncngz.com. What does frkncngz mean? I have no idea. But what I do know is that this blog has all of these quotes and sometimes pictures that are either funny or emo or inspiring…all of my favorite things! I think I’ve spent at least an hour a day for the past week reading the archives, which I probably shouldn’t admit publicly. But whatever. Here are some of the ones that I love:


Wonderful, right?

[Posted by Mallory]

3 Comments

Filed under blogging, humor, random, thoughts

youtube clip of today: wisdom teeth.

This kills me:

I don’t know about you guys, but I think that is far funnier than David After Dentist. I mean, the girl raps about Jesus. And speaks in a British accent. And talks about unicorns flying her to magical lands. Almost makes me want to get some teeth pulled.

[Posted by Mallory]

Leave a comment

Filed under humor, random, religion, YouTube

happy birthday to my little walsher!

Today is a very important day. It marks the 24th year that one of my favorite people in the word has been alive. I mean, 24, gross, but there’s a lot for Walsh to celebrate: surviving college, having me in her life, the work of The Postal Service…

Back in the day, when Walsh and I were mild freakshows who managed to find each other (and other delightful freakshows) in the halls of our freshman dorm, we ADORED that song. It was borderline unhealthy. And I’m not saying we sang duets and alternated who was the girl and who was the boy, but we totally sang duets and alternated who was the girl and who was the boy. Sometimes it really amazes me that I have friends.

Then I remember that Walsh makes things like this in her free time…

…and I understand why it all works. So here’s to you, Walsh. I’m glad you were born, glad you were adopted, and DAMN thankful that you saw past my side ponytail so that we could get to where we are today. HAPPY BIRTHDAY!

[Posted by Mallory]

1 Comment

Filed under adventures, music, news, post-college depression

crazy shiz going on with tiger.

As you may have heard, here or elsewhere, Tiger Woods did some naughty things and for a while everyone hated him. Now he is trying to get everyone to love him again. There’s a lot of interesting stuff going on related to that, what with Elin Woods being sort of unreadable and Tiger doing weird shit like making a creepy commercial with the hope that people will forgive him. A few comments about that…

First, a Just Six Words and a Picture submittal from loyal reader Susnan:

Riddle me this: zippers for whaaaat?

Fair question, Susnan. Faaair question. I read an interesting article yesterday about the fact that Elin Woods has been pretty impossible to read these days. She’s always wearing her sunglasses, and she hasn’t quite condemned/all-out ditched Tiger, but she’s also not standing by him. Those crazy Swedes…what ARE they thinking?

But the real question of the week is Who thought this commercial was a good idea?!:

Frankly, I don’t understand. Who sat in on that Nike meeting and was like “OOH, I’ve got it. Let’s have Tiger stare at the camera looking all haggard and pathetic, and we’ll have his DEAD DAD do a voiceover that seems to be questioning this whole affair thing. GENIUS!” And it is genius. If by genius they mean creepy as fuck. I think that no matter what Tiger’s publicity team does for him, he will get back in the nation’s good graces to some extent simply because he’s a good golfer. We are great at ignoring the indiscretions of celebrities, and because he’s had his public flogging, I think things would have gone back to normal either way. So…from my expert standpoint, this commercial was unnecessary (as in won’t help Tiger or Nike all that much), except to give people nightmares. Yay!

With boob zippers on our mind and Tiger’s piercing stare in our hearts, I bid you a happy Friday.

[Posted by Mallory]

Leave a comment

Filed under celebrities, news, pop culture, weird, YouTube

youtube clip of today: single ladies.

Lots of wisdom in this video: you can be a single lady if you want. Also, lots of therapy in this baby’s future.  But he’s so cute!

[Posted by Kathleen]

1 Comment

Filed under babies, dance, humor, music, pop culture, random, YouTube

itunes genius just might be racist.

I’m a big fan of the Genius feature on iTunes, and I’m also a big fan of the country music. For those of you still left without modern technology, Genius is basically like Pandora (is that like using the word to define the word?), but using your own music. You can select a song and the Apple Gods magically find other songs of a similar genre, and voila, a playlist! It’s a great trick, and normally makes me some kickass playlists. But on this country kind of day, I selected a Darius Rucker song as my starting point, and things got a little weird. Here’s the playlist iTunes made for me:

Click to make it bigger.

For those of you who don’t know, Darius Rucker is a country singer these days, and before that he was the lead singer of Hootie & the Blowfish. Still, somehow, iTunes confused my buddy Darius for a mediocre R&B singer from the ’90s/early 2000s. Which is both disappointing and totally racist. Just saying. If this were Pandora, the explanation would have been “To start things off, we’ll play a song that exemplifies the musical style of Darius Rucker, which features…aw shit, never mind, this is just a list of other black dudes singing, with some J.Lo thrown in for good measure.”

But on the bright side, now you guys get a taste of some of the embarrassing music that I never listen to but keep on my iTunes because one day I just might want to have a middle school dance theme party, and that would require a soundtrack filled with Monica and TLC. I’m a girl who likes to be prepared.

In other news, I’m about to head to relive my college days with my little sister, who just turned 21. Wish me luck, and let’s hope I don’t slip into a post-college depression and begin sobbing every other drink. That might ruin the mood.

[Ed. Note: This is SWTCTW’s 800th post! Cwazy! Thanks for sticking with us for this long.]

[Posted by Mallory]

1 Comment

Filed under humor, music, post-college depression, weird

beards, ben, and levi johnston’s blues.

The Ben Folds and a Piano concert on Friday was awesome, and I have a new crush: his opening act, Zach Williams:

Beard? Check. Flannel? Check. Guitar? Check. Adorable wife and daughter whom he talked about lots? Sigh, check.

Because Mr. Williams is not yet supa-famous, we were able to chat with him after the concert. That gave me the opportunity to say really creepy things like, “There are so many things that are great about you, and one of them is your beard. Never get rid of it.” (Don’t worry, I followed that up by Facebook friending him and sending him a message. Yes, I fully expect him to be celebrating his first Stalker Fan. And yes, I did have too many Dark ‘n’ Stormies at dinner.) Here’s a taste (and I’m not entirely sure why he’s lying on the floor, but hey, art!):

Here’s another one of my favorites. And here’s the one he wrote about his daughter. So effing cute.

Ben Folds, of course, was amazing as well, and ended the show with a phenomenal rendition of “Bitches Ain’t Shit.” But the crowning moment of his set was when he played “Levi Johnston’s Blues.” If you didn’t love ol’ Ben before (ahem, MATT), you will now:

And with that, I bid you good day.

[Posted by Mallory]

Leave a comment

Filed under celebrities, crushes, music, pop culture, YouTube

please don’t be a player hater.

I adore this song:

There is so much good music in my life these days, and that makes me absurdly happy. I have Ben Folds and Zach Williams tonight, and Phoenix, Ted Leo and the Pharmacists, and Jakob Dylan and Neko Case on the agenda in coming weeks. I’m a lucky girl.

Happy Friday, kiddos!

[Posted by Mallory]

1 Comment

Filed under music, YouTube

youtube clip of today: a BFD.

Oh FINE.  Unless you’ve been living under a rock, you’ve seen it (and certainly heard it) by now, but here is everyone’s Uncle Joe dropping the F bomb on live TV.

I think he’s the greatest.  He’s just so lovably inappropriate!  You know he was sitting there thinking to himself, “What powerful words can I say to B that he will remember for the rest of his life?” Well, he certainly found the words to say. Perhaps he just forgot that there were 250 hot mics around.  Regardless, I’m glad it happened, and here’s why: it’s been lightening up the health care debate and people have been having some fun with it.

Yup.  School House Rock got BFD’d.

But back to Biden. As Press Secretary Robert Gibbs tweeted, “And yes, Mr. Vice President, you’re right“. Because he is.  It IS a big deal.  And it’s long overdue.

PS- Here is a great tool to see how the health care legislation will affect you.  Super easy– just put in your marital status, if/how you have health care and what you make.  Click here.

[Posted by Kathleen]

Leave a comment

Filed under blogging, crushes, health, history, humor, news, politics, pop culture, random, the hill, TV, YouTube