Category Archives: post-college depression

youtube clip of today: college acceptance.

A high school senior gets his acceptance letter to the University of Richmond.

We know how exactly you feel. SWTCTW welcomes you to the club, kid!

(Cross posted at everythingisavesselforgoatcheese)

 

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Filed under blogging, education, humor, post-college depression, YouTube

today is a google holiday, hooray!

Today’s Google Holiday: 55th Anniversary: Rose Parks refuses to move. I love this one, although I find it disconcerting that on the same day this is a Google Holiday, there’s an NYT headline that reads, “Pentagon Sees Little Risk in Allowing Gay Men and Women to Serve Openly.” That this is a headline in 2010, 55 years after Rosa Parks stood up — or rather, sat down — for herself on that bus, makes me wonder if we’ve really come very far at all.

What I was Googling: blow dry. It’s a LivingSocial thing. Which is it, co-blogger Kathleen?!!?!

In other news, today is December 1 and it was almost 65 degrees in DC this morning. It was also raining, and I bonded with my cohorts at the bus stop as our umbrellas flipped inside out with every gust of wind. Then I got on the sweaty, sweaty bus and stood directly across from a girl I went to college with. We ignored each other. MATURITY.

[Posted by Mallory]

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Filed under adventures, history, news, politics, post-college depression

a monday roundup of random stuff.

Just a friendly reminder, courtesy of PostSecret.

GUYS. Guess what? I’m officially done with grad school. Do you know what that means?! I’ll tell you: I get to wear a hood and stand out in the sun wearing polyester on Friday, and I get my nights and weekends back. Let’s celebrate with a collection of assorted finds from the Internets:

Happy Monday, everyone! And a happy belated birthday to co-blogger Kathleen! I think we successfully proved this weekend that your mid-twenties don’t really have to be any different from college. Thank goodness for that.

[Posted by Mallory]

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Filed under animals, humor, music, news, post-college depression, random, weird

happy birthday to my little walsher!

Today is a very important day. It marks the 24th year that one of my favorite people in the word has been alive. I mean, 24, gross, but there’s a lot for Walsh to celebrate: surviving college, having me in her life, the work of The Postal Service…

Back in the day, when Walsh and I were mild freakshows who managed to find each other (and other delightful freakshows) in the halls of our freshman dorm, we ADORED that song. It was borderline unhealthy. And I’m not saying we sang duets and alternated who was the girl and who was the boy, but we totally sang duets and alternated who was the girl and who was the boy. Sometimes it really amazes me that I have friends.

Then I remember that Walsh makes things like this in her free time…

…and I understand why it all works. So here’s to you, Walsh. I’m glad you were born, glad you were adopted, and DAMN thankful that you saw past my side ponytail so that we could get to where we are today. HAPPY BIRTHDAY!

[Posted by Mallory]

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itunes genius just might be racist.

I’m a big fan of the Genius feature on iTunes, and I’m also a big fan of the country music. For those of you still left without modern technology, Genius is basically like Pandora (is that like using the word to define the word?), but using your own music. You can select a song and the Apple Gods magically find other songs of a similar genre, and voila, a playlist! It’s a great trick, and normally makes me some kickass playlists. But on this country kind of day, I selected a Darius Rucker song as my starting point, and things got a little weird. Here’s the playlist iTunes made for me:

Click to make it bigger.

For those of you who don’t know, Darius Rucker is a country singer these days, and before that he was the lead singer of Hootie & the Blowfish. Still, somehow, iTunes confused my buddy Darius for a mediocre R&B singer from the ’90s/early 2000s. Which is both disappointing and totally racist. Just saying. If this were Pandora, the explanation would have been “To start things off, we’ll play a song that exemplifies the musical style of Darius Rucker, which features…aw shit, never mind, this is just a list of other black dudes singing, with some J.Lo thrown in for good measure.”

But on the bright side, now you guys get a taste of some of the embarrassing music that I never listen to but keep on my iTunes because one day I just might want to have a middle school dance theme party, and that would require a soundtrack filled with Monica and TLC. I’m a girl who likes to be prepared.

In other news, I’m about to head to relive my college days with my little sister, who just turned 21. Wish me luck, and let’s hope I don’t slip into a post-college depression and begin sobbing every other drink. That might ruin the mood.

[Ed. Note: This is SWTCTW’s 800th post! Cwazy! Thanks for sticking with us for this long.]

[Posted by Mallory]

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Filed under humor, music, post-college depression, weird

devil wears prada correspondent on MFCs.

anne_hathaway_devil_wears_prada_chanel

Our dear friend — let’s call her Corporate Barbie — had the most ridonk, legit Anne-Hathaway-in-The-Devil-Wears-Prada job ever. She survived a year and got promoted, and luckily her sense of humor emerged unscathed. Because this here blog is the quickest way to fame — of any kind, really — she penned this little number and asked that we share it with the masses. And I DO mean masses (hi masses! thanks for reading!). As Corporate Barbie explained, “I thought you might enjoy a piece I wrote earlier today.  It is inspired by my life”:

Earlier today I mentioned to some friends that we should go to the movies tonight. I was under the influence of a “Mid-Friday Crisis” (MFC). Allow me to elaborate.

The MFC typically occurs between 11am and 1pm on Fridays after a Thursday night out, although it can happen at anytime. You know you are having an MFC when you look at your clock and think to your self, “Crap, I have to start being more responsible. It’s only 10:59 and I can’t order lunch yet because I just ate an egg sandwich. The day is not even close to over and I have so much to do that I inevitably will not accomplish.”

Once this thought enters your head, ideas such as “staying in on Thursdays” and “going to the movies on Fridays” immediately follow. And you are actually able to think they are good ideas.

Then you order a grilled cheese/chicken parm sandwich, someone mentions a cover band and the clock turns 2:45. The end of the day is in sight. The Black Eyed Peas “I Gotta Feeling” becomes the theme song to the soundtrack of your life and you can already taste the bad decisions and terrible dance moves you will be pairing with Yuengling and whiskey tonight.

It is safe to say that our resilience when faced with an MFC is the direct cause to why we are such messes.

I wish you all fun Fridays. I’ll be at the Whiskey Bar in Hoboken if any of you care to join!

[Posted by Mallory, but written by Corporate Barbie. (Maybe you think Corporate Barbie is meant to be offensive. It’s not, don’t worry. Corporate Barbie just has a tendency to look exactly like a Barbie in photos.)]

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Filed under adventures, drinks, food, humor, pop culture, post-college depression

quarters to spare? anyone? pretty please?

Let’s talk for a bit about how strange and awkward I am. So the washer and dryer in my building only take quarters (yeah, those kind still exist), and this always presents a bit of a conundrum for me because I, um, have yet to get signed up with a bank in DC. I know, it’s not smart and I’m wasting money on ATM fees and yada yada, but it’s the truth. This means that when I need quarters, I can’t just go to the bank and get a roll; instead, my strategy is to go begging at various CVS’s and grocery stores. For the most part, this has worked just fine. Occasionally I have to go to a few stores, but with a couple dollars here and there and the quarters I find in my purses, I can manage.

Today did not go so smoothly. I first go to the CVS across the street and the lady is like,”Sure thing! I can give you a dollar!” Um, lady? It’s 2009! It costs $1.25 to do ONE load of laundry. And rather than begging her for more, I sheepishly walk away. Then I move on to the Dunkin’ Donuts next store. They have donuts! They must be nice! As I’m waiting in line, I decide that I should probably order an iced coffee, because that’s what people order from Dunkin’ Donuts, right? The problem is that I don’t drink coffee, so I paid three dollars for a drink I can’t finish, and THEY HAD NO QUARTERS. Boycott your local Dunkin’ Donuts! Don’t listen to Rachael Ray! Also, anyone want this?

i hate you iced coffee

When you’re on your way over to pick up the coffee, feel free to pick me up an iPhone so that I can upload normal-looking photos to my blog. Thanks!

After the Dunkin’ Donuts attempt, I decide to take a break, throw in the two loads of laundry I can afford, and smoke a cigarette. (Okay, I don’t smoke. But if I did I would have totally smoked a cigarette right then.)

My next stop was Safeway. Club soda, sure! I need club soda! As I wait in line to buy my club sode, I prepare my pity plea, and when I get to the register, I lay it on Danny: “Um, hi sir! I have a favor to ask! You see, I really need to do laundry, and see, I’ve been begging all of these stores for quarters, and no one will give me any. Look, I didn’t even want this iced coffee, haha! [Shakes iced coffee in Danny’s face.] So, um, if I give you some cash, will you give me some quarters??” And Danny’s all, “Sweetheart, you know that if you give ten dollars to the Customer Service lady, she can give you a roll of quarters?” And I’m all, “HALLELUJAH SAFEWAY IS MY NEW FAVORITE STORE!!!”

I walk over to the Customer Service lady, a 60-something woman, and she’s cold teasin’ me and says, “Aw Danny said I could give you quarters? Only for a fee!” And my natural response is, “I’ll give you a kiss!”

REALLY, Mallory? You’ll give the woman a kiss? Really?

Moral of the story: sometimes, when I whore myself out for quarters, I end up hitting on grandmothers. Happy Friday to you too!

[Posted my Mallory]

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Filed under adventures, money, post-college depression