Tag Archives: education

here’s your freaky friday grab bag.

I don't know what bothers me more, the mutiple !!! or the comic sans font.  Whatever, TGIF.

I don't know what bothers me more, the !!!! or the comic sans font. Whatever, TGIF.

It’s freaky Friday, y’all.  While only one of these stories is really freaky, it’s so freaky that it dominates the non-freaky stories.  Let’s just get to the point:

  • Amy Wolfe, a 33-year-old unemployed church organist, loves carnival rides.  Well, actually just one.  No, she doesn’t just love it.  She like LOVE LOVES it.  Amy is an objectum sexual, meaning she falls in love with inanimate objects.  No joke.  And soon, Amy and her love, named the 1001 Nacht, will be machine and wife.  She and it are getting married. (I felt weird saying “they”.)  She plans on taking the surname Weber, after Nachtie’s manufacturer.  I promise you I am not making this up!  Read the story the Jezzies have on it, it includes UNBELIEVABLE video.
  • This falls under the just plain dumb and hilarious column.  Dennis Cretton isn’t supposed to drive anymore.  After a DWI, his license was revoked.  Dennis found what he believed to be the solution to his troubles.  He decided to drive his lawnmower to the gas station to get beer.  Fortunately for the world (and unfortunately for our friend Dennis), the police got a call reporting a man drunkenly weaving in and out of traffic on a lawnmower.  According to the story on MSNBC, he tried speeding away from the cops, and drove up onto his lawn. (I wonder who mowed the rest of it?)  He spilled his case of Milwaukee’s Best and ran into his house.  Needless to say, he ended up in jail.

Have a wonderful weekend everybody! I hope your daily dose of weird was satisfying.  More and longer posts next week, I promise.  XOXO.

[Posted by Kathleen]

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Filed under blogging, drinks, education, news, pop culture, random, sex, thoughts, weddings, weird

blogging from the dnc, day 2.

Alright, let’s just face it. Live blogging isn’t going to happen. It’s like end of the day round ups. Haha. And this isn’t really edited.

Hello from Denver! (I hate when people say stuff like that. Aloha from Hawaii! Hola from Mexico! My apologies for being annoying). Mal, I wish you were here. I’ve had quite the Democratic day and I think I’m glowing with Democratness. Seriously glowing. I also have blisters that look like moon craters on my feet. Note to self- wearing brand new shoes in attempts to look good is not a wise idea when you’re going to be walking around and standing on your feet all friggin’ day. HOW COME I DO NOT KNOW THESE THINGS?! Anyway, day two of the convention had a few differences from day one. Yesterday appeared to be a lovefest. Today was all about policy and stickin’ it to old Johnny McCain.

Anyway, busy busy day today! A little continental brekky and we were off. A good family friend lives in Denver and offered us the use of a car during our stay in Denver. Imagine my surprise when it was a big, red 1995 Dodge Durango. I wanted to put a sign that said “this is a actually a hybrid car” on the back–I felt so un-Democratic! Ummmm, where’s my Prius with a Barack sticker? All kidding aside, it was great to have the Durango, and cruising around in the Durango was an adventure for sure. Thank the sweet lord I wasn’t driving. It’s a legitimate tank.  Oh, this is funny.  We parked the Durango and then lost it.  Yup.  We weren’t entirely sure where big red was.  But we found it.  Eventually.

Our first big event of the day was Emily’s List. I’ve never been so fired up about having two X chromosomes. Speakers wise, it was the grand trifecta of girl power. Hillary Clinton, Nancy Pelosi, and Michelle Obama. I know, I was giddy. People went berserk when HRC stepped out. I mean seriously cra-crazy. She was good, giving shoutouts to Barack and Michelle, and acknowledging the tragic loss of Congresswoman Stephanie Tubbs Jones. (STJ was a huuuuuuuuuge Hillary supporter, but was good about getting behind Obama.) It was a solid Hillary speech. Nancy came out, and I must say, she looked lovely in lavendar. During her speech, one Code Pink wacko screeched “Why aren’t you woman enough to impeach?!” She was booed. For those that don’t know who Code Pink is, they’re a group of extremist women (and every now and then a dude) who wear all pink and yell about impeachment. When the group started, they were anti-war. That’s cool. But now they are so radical and obnoxious that they are counteractive. They get kicked out of every event because they’re disruptive and rude. And to address the impeachment thing, here’s an easy way to explain it. If a house is on fire, the first thing you do is get the people out–not try and prosecute who set it on fire. Bush and Cheney are criminals, and hopefully the big book of the law will be thrown at their bums. But for now, let’s help the people of the nation. If you think Congress doesn’t get anything done now (which is false. The House passes everything. It’s the Senate’s fault. Cough LIEBERMAN cough) then imagine what it would be like with impeachment hearings. Okay. FOCUS.

So Michelle spoke next, clearly she looked impeccable. And here’s the interesting thing about her speech. On Monday night, she didn’t discuss policy at all. It seemed as if they were taking her away from that aspect of the campaign so as to soften her image. But at the Emily’s List event, she was all about policy. Education, health care, choice. You go girl. She seemed a little nervous though. Hmm.

Spotted: Gloria Allred, Chelsea Clinton, Betsy Myers (COO of Obama’s campaign/my hero)

One veterans event, and then the madness of the Pepsi Center. It felt like walking into a rock concert–a Barack concert, if you will. OHHHHHH. Sowwy. That was bad. Anyway, Mark Warner was boring. Yeah, I said it. BO-RING. It’s so obvious that man wants to be el presidente. He will run in eight years. And when I’m right, somebody please buy me a chocolate chip cookie. But there’s this new kid in town that shook things up. Montana Governor Brian Schweitzer was a hoot. He got up there in his sexy, sexy bolo tie (rawr) and smacked McCain around a bit. You know how people usually get fired up at the end of their speeches? I legit thought this man was ending his speech eight separate times. He was so fired up that I couldn’t help but be excited too. New political crush, for sure. Blahdiddy blah blah Deval Patrick blah blah. He’s cool. Oh, and then this lady from New York spoke. Um yes, Hillllllz! Now you all know from my previous posting that B is my boy. But Hill deserves some R-E-S-P-E-C-T. Her speech was well-written, well-delivered, and exactly what was needed to finalize unity and end the fissure between Barack and Hillary supporters. And oh girl, she had some zingers. That line about the Twin Cities? Priceless. My favorite part was when she asked the Hillary people if they were doing it just for her or the country. That’s what it’s all about. I think that’s why Barack eventually won. His campaign has been about the volunteers, the power of the people and starting a movement. Of course people love B. He’s just so lovable. But Hillary’s supporters, while caring about the country, seemed to be obsessed with Hillary and so focused on Hillary that they forgot about themselves. Don’t freak out on me, that’s just what I noticed. Oh, and Chelsea is looking awesome. Good for her for taking a large role in last night.

Walking out of the convention area was like a carnival. If carnivals included the crazies screaming in your face with aborted baby fetus pictures. Sick. If you want to talk about baby killers, talk about the Bush administration sending young men and women to fight in Iraq. They are practically just babies, and they pay the ultimate price. But I digress. My favorites were the signs and screamers condemning “homo-sex” and screaming about Jeeeeesus. Newsflash, dumb-dumbs. JC stood for love, not hating on our fellow man and woman. The vendors were pretty funny though. The best sales pitch I heard was from a guy standing next to a crazy Christian. “We’re all going to hell!,” the vendor shouted. “Might as well buy buttons!” Well put, buddy. But despite a hearty chuckle, I did not buy the buttons.

Spotted: Bill Richardson, Jack Murtha, John Kerry and some other randos.

One party later and then we went back to the hotel. No Ben Affleck or George Clooney. But I’m looking. My feet are killing me. Time for bed. Day 3: Biden speaks.

[Posted by Kathleen]

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Filed under celebrities, crushes, news, politics, pop culture, random

nyt op-ed roundup of the day.

Okay, so I really just want to write about two particular New York Times op-ed pieces, but let’s go ahead and call it a roundup because that sounds more bloggy and professional.

The first article that all of you must read is Nicholas Kristof’s “It Takes a School, Not Missiles.” Kristof talks about Greg Mortenson, “a frumpy, genial man from Montana” who has made it his mission to build schools (mostly for girls) in Pakistan and Afghanistan. Mortenson is the author of the crazy popular book Three Cups of Tea, which I actually had not heard of until my grandma recommended it to me this weekend. I can’t wait to read it. I’ll give you one of the best excerpts from the article, and then I’ll let you read it yourself:

“I am convinced that the long-term solution to terrorism in general, and Afghanistan specifically, is education,” Lt. Col. Christopher Kolenda, who works on the Afghan front lines, said in an e-mail in which he raved about Mr. Mortenson’s work. “The conflict here will not be won with bombs but with books. … The thirst for education here is palpable.”

Military force is essential in Afghanistan to combat the Taliban. But over time, in Pakistan and Afghanistan alike, the best tonic against militant fundamentalism will be education and economic opportunity.

So a lone Montanan staying at the cheapest guest houses has done more to advance U.S. interests in the region than the entire military and foreign policy apparatus of the Bush administration.

Here’s a photo of Mortenson and some of the kids he helped:

The second article I want to share with you was written by this obscure guest columnist for the Times, a United States senator from Illinois named Barack Obama. Saint B’s article is about his plan for Iraq. The article is worth reading for all those people who say that Obama is just some young punk who has no idea what he’s talking about and is going to send the world spiraling into chaos. Again, take a look at an excerpt, then go read the whole thing:

As I’ve said many times, we must be as careful getting out of Iraq as we were careless getting in. We can safely redeploy our combat brigades at a pace that would remove them in 16 months. That would be the summer of 2010 — two years from now, and more than seven years after the war began. After this redeployment, a residual force in Iraq would perform limited missions: going after any remnants of Al Qaeda in Mesopotamia, protecting American service members and, so long as the Iraqis make political progress, training Iraqi security forces. That would not be a precipitous withdrawal.

Well put, Barry. Well put.

And I know I’m not particularly ahead of the curve in talking about these articles — they are the top one and two most emailed articles on the NYT right now — but in case you don’t frequent the Times, I wanted to make sure you could take a look. Happy reading!

[Posted by Mallory]

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