Tag Archives: lindsay lohan

lohan claims a human rights violation.

Oh, LiLo. A few people have passed this my way already this morning. Lindsay is now saying the “f*** u” written on her fingernail was a just a joke, and it had nothing to do with her court appearance. It is almost unbelievable, at this point, that she isn’t smart enough to realize that she is under a microscope and something like that would be seen. Anyway, the Lohan believes all of this criticism is unfair, and that she has been subjected to cruelty, so she took to her Twitter account to clear things up.

She essentially claimed that her human rights had been violated, and tweeted Article 5 of the U.N. Universal Declaration of Human Rights. Yes, really.

No one shall be subjected to torture or to cruel, inhuman or degrading treatment or punishment.

And then she quotes law professor Erik Luna:

“November 1 marked the 15th anniversary of the U.S. Sentencing Guidelines. But there were no celebrations, parades, or other festivities in honor of this punishment scheme created by Congress and the U.S. Sentencing Commission… Instead, the day passed like most others during the last 15 years: Scores of federal defendants sentenced under a constitutionally perverted system that saps moral judgment through its mechanical rules.”

Well, we all know she’s wrong. And I have a smarty-pants friend that made logical points to counter Lindsay’s rambling:

a.  She’s referring to the wrong body of law- this is a GA assembly resolution- the universal declaration of human rights is not binding to the US.
b. The International Covenant on Civil and Political Rights is binding to the US.
c. Our own constitution protects against cruel and unusual punishment.

Celebrities! Who would we mock without them?

After that, she posted a link to the Newsweek story on Sakineh Mohammadi Ashtiani, an Iranian woman who will be stoned to death for adultery. Let’s all hope she isn’t comparing her situation to that human rights tragedy.

But in all honesty, I find it sad that LiLo’s delusional enough to think that she doesn’t deserve to abide by the court’s rules like the rest of us. Maybe this whole experience will do the girl some good. (But that’s been said before, right?)

[Posted by Kathleen]

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Filed under celebrities, cry face, definitely not politics, news, pop culture, random, thoughts, weird

just six words and a picture.

I feel irked by the fact that I am contributing to the clogging of the interwebs with more LiLo news, but alas, she’s just asking for it.

LiLo’s parting words, before jail time.

or

Read her lips, or rather, fingernail.

[Posted by Kathleen]

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Filed under celebrities, humor, news, pictures, pop culture, weird

i was starting to like her…

I was sort of starting to like Lindsay Lohan again. I obviously loved her in that Parent Trap remake and Mean Girls and the awkward movie about the living doll with Tyra Banks, but then she got all crazy and unlovable. But LiLo has recently been back with a guest spot on Ugly Betty. (I, by the way, love Ugly Betty. Daniel and Betty are so fucking cute and Amanda and Mark might be my favorite girl-plus-gay-guy couple ever.) Miss Lohan was actually pretty good in the few episodes she was in. Sure, you HATED her character by the end, but she seemed to sort of have a sense of humor about the role, down to some jokes about rehab. 

And then Lindsay had to go on the teevee and do this (watch until about 21 seconds in, then go scream into a pillow):

Um, REALLY? 

UPDATE: Reader B-lo made this point in the comments:

“I don’t know–it’s definitely garbled right when she allegedly said “colored”. Kinda sounds like a chop job to me. Why would that be the only word in the whole interview that isn’t completely clear?”

I listened to the clip a few times before posting it because I was skeptical, but I was pretty convinced that she said “colored.” What do you guys think?

[Posted by Mallory]

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Filed under celebrities, news, politics, pop culture

diamonds are a girl’s dead friend.

Everyone has their own way of grieving after a loved one has passed away, but this walks the thin line between “do what you need to do to get by” and “that’s really weird”.  I’m just going to say it the bluntest way possible, because I don’t know how else to explain it.  You can turn dead people’s ashes into diamonds.  Yup.  They’re called remembrance diamonds.  If this is something you think you might be interested in, a company in Switzerland, called Algordanza, will help you out.  Imagine all the awkwardness that this could prompt!

Woman 1:  Those diamond earrings you’re wearing are just GORGEOUS!  Did your husband buy those for your anniversary?

Woman 2:  Oh no!  It’s my Great Uncle Walter!  He just died a few months ago.

Woman 1:  Ahh, I see.  So the diamonds are a family heirloom?

Woman 2:  No, the diamonds are literally my Great Uncle Walter.

Woman 1:  Errr…did you get the sympathy card I sent you a few months back?

And this bling does not come cheap.  Reuters gives us a figure around $7,488…sometimes less, sometimes more.  Eeek.

So what are people doing with these diamonds?  Obviously they turn them into jewelry or keep them in a box.  But one widow had a touching idea–mount the diamond into the table where her hubby used to sit at the local pub.  Of course!  If I’m ever turned into a diamond, PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE place me at The Cellar.  (If you went to Richmond, you know what I’m talking about.)

So how popular are these things?

In its first year, 2004, the company sold one diamond. These days it is creating about 60 a month, which Brimer attributes to word-of-mouth recommendations and media coverage, as Algordanza does not advertise.

I was discussing this with my manly, bearded friend Neil.  Neil, who is pursuing his Masters in Marketing or something weird like that, said he could come up with a good pitch for remembrance diamonds if given some time.  The world is waiting, Neil.  This should be a toughie.  I encourage all readers to think of witty advertising for this and to post it as a comment.  Maybe someone could convince Lindsay Lohan to wear one.  Or Lil’ Jon can put them in his teeth or something.  That’s sure to jumpstart the trend.

As if this couldn’t get creepier, the technology to make diamonds from ashes can also be applied to make synthetic diamonds from other materials…such as hair.  SICK.

Bobby Thurman — of Nelson Funeral Service in Arkansas, which offers diamonds to both burial and cremation clients — decided to have LifeGem make a diamond from combined samples of his own and his family’s hair.

“My family will cherish this diamond for generations, and I expect other families will want to do the same,” Thurman said.

I’m expect most families DO NOT want to do the same, Bobby.  But whatev.

I’m sorry for the morbid six word title/subject, but I couldn’t let this go by without sharing it.  And the title is kind of clever, no?

[Posted by Kathleen]

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