My sister showed me this video last night, and I sat silent beside her as I watched the entire thing. When it was over, she turned to me and said, “What, so you didn’t think it was funny?!” And frankly, people, this thing is just too awkward for laughter. Or any reaction at all. Except ohdeargod I feel uncomfortable. See for yourselves:
[Posted by Mallory]
Now, here is a serious tragedy. Kellogg has reported that there will be a shortage of Eggo waffles until next summer. Two of the four plants that mass-produce the waffles are shut down for the time-being. The largest “bakery” in Rossville, Tennessee is closed indefinitely for repairs and the other in Atlanta was shut down because of an unprecedented amount of rain from a September storm.
If all else fails, we could all cut holes in cardboard and throw them in the toaster. I bet we couldn’t tell the difference.
[Posted by Shannon]
Watch this (video is blurry for the first couple of seconds):
”He grabbed it in his mouth, just like Pacman,” Biada said. ”He just ate it right there.”
That’s the best line from the news story that goes with it.
This guy has seen a lot of spy movies.
There’s not much left to say after that. Haha.
[Posted by Kathleen]
I should have posted this last week, but Thanksgiving kind of got in the way. I present to you the Christian Side Hug rap. This is not a joke. I promise.
I personally have huge problems with side hugs. They seem so insincere. So if you hug me, make it a full frontal. How naughty!
[Posted by Kathleen]
This whole possible scandal with Tiger Woods has me scratching my head along with the rest of the world following the story. And yes, I know, none of this is any of my business and the media probably should give the guy and his family their privacy…but I can’t help but be intrigued.
Here’s the story as it’s being reported: Tiger was leaving his Florida estate at about 3:00 AM on Friday night/Saturday morning when he ran into a tree and a fire hydrant on his neighbor’s property. At some point, his wife took a golf club to the back of his SUV, allegedly to rescue him from the car because he was knocked unconscious in the wreck. The airbags of the SUV never deployed. He was then taken to the hospital with lacerations around his mouth and released in good condition.
Ok, let’s start a list of things that are strange about this story.
1. Why is Tiger leaving his home at 3:00 in the morning? While there could be a million logical explanations for this, he hasn’t offered up any so we are left to wonder. I would conclude he is either sneaking out of his house or he got in a fight with his wife and was bailing.
2. Apparently, if car airbags don’t deploy, the car probably isn’t going over 30 or so miles per hour. Do you really think that he would have been knocked unconscious going that slowly? Maybe, but it seems far fetched to me.
3. His wife was supposed to have knocked in the back window to rescue her husband. It seems far more likely to me that she may have been taking out her anger on the back window, especially if the infidelity rumors are true.
4. Tiger had cuts and lacerations around his mouth. Again, I’m not an expert, but how do you sustain those types on injuries from a car accident like this? It makes more sense that those cuts were inflicted by an angry wife.
5. The Woods family has refused to speak to the police or the media about the incident on several occasions. The media I completely understand, but the police? If they have nothing to hide, they’re certainly doing a great job acting like they do.
Tiger’s official statement leaves a lot to be desired for the wondering public. Tiger basically says he will not speak about the incident beyond the fact that he had a single car accident and his wife acted courageously. He says all the rumors are irresponsible and untrue.
I sure wish he would elaborate and I imagine this won’t go away unless he does.
UPDATE:
Tiger apologized for his wrongdoings on his website without going into specifics. So it looks like he’s a filthy cheater after all. Tiger, I expected more from you.
[Posted by Shannon]
Happy Friday, readership!
Oh, hello. Me again. Since the real job is getting in the way of my bloggy job, I’ve condensed a week’s worth of what I liked into one fabulous Friday post. Does that work for you? I sure hope so!
You all know how much I love stories about sci-fi weirdos (apparently the cool way to spell it now is SyFy. Anybody else notice that the Sci-Fi Channel changed its spelling?). Well, here’s a good one! Computational linguistics expert d’Armond Speers spoke only Klingon to his son for the first three years of the boy’s life. Ummm, WHAT? He claims it was an experiment to see if his son would learn it like any normal human language in the early developmental stages.
He just confirmed what every child already knows– you are an experiment, and your parents are trying to corrupt you and make you as uncool as possible.
Here is the best quote from the article:
As for Speers, who still gets nostalgic when he recalls singing the Klingon lullaby “May the Empire Endure” with his son at bedtime, the experiment was a dud. His son is now in high school and doesn’t speak a word of Klingon.
Stay strong, young Speers!
Like any good yuppie bleeding-heart liberal, I have an iPhone. We all know that there is an app for everything, but this new one is so hilarious and wonderful that I have to share it with you. It’s totally politically nerdy, but it’s a bobble head guide to every single member of Congress. Here is my favorite member of Congress:
Best 99 cents I’ve ever spent. Download Bobble Rep.
Speaking of politics, lots of good stuff going on, eh? Lieberman sucks more than ever and the women’s movement took two steps back no thanks to Rep. Stupak.
I also remain perplexed as to how people can manipulate the messages of Christianity in light of healthcare reform. To me, it seems that giving a little extra so our brothers and sisters will be able to be healthy and able to succeed in life is following that message. Yet even the Christian right wing (like my girrrrrrl, Michele Bachman) has condemned it as communism, fascism, Marxism and any other ism you can imagine that probably doesn’t make sense. Grrr.
Hey, speaking of Christianity– I know people are complaining about how early it’s coming, but sweet Jesus I love Christmastime. And I love the new Gap ads! Add being a Gap backup dancer to my bucketlist, right after being a Fanta Girl and a dancing iPod shadow.
Sigh.
In other news, Oprah is ending her show in 2011. I’m not too upset about this. She’s going to have her own TV station in 2011, and she’ll have 25 years of her show in syndication so I really don’t see the big deal. They’ll still be enough of O’s wisdom to go around.
Oh, and just in time for a junky fastfood lunch:
But you know where you should really go? Chipotle.
Okay, I think that’s it for now. Miss me, because I miss you.
[Posted by Kathleen]
My biology lovin’ boyfriend had tried to get me to watch this video for about a month. Each time he asked me if I’d watched it yet, I’d give some legitimate excuse, like “I’m so sorry, I just don’t have 5 minutes to spare in my unemployed day.”
Well, when I had run out of excuses and finally watched it, I was amazed…just as he promised I would be. The part where the octopus literally transforms himself (I guess its a him? How sexist of me) into the coral is so cool. I know it starts off somewhat slow, but watch it through to the end – I swear.
The website is also an interesting concept. This is an excerpt from the “About TED” page, because they said it better than me.
“TED is a small nonprofit devoted to Ideas Worth Spreading. It started out (in 1984) as a conference bringing together people from three worlds: Technology, Entertainment, Design. Since then its scope has become ever broader. Along with the annual TED Conference in Long Beach, California, and the TEDGlobal conference in Oxford UK, TED includes the award-winning TEDTalks video site, the Open Translation Program, the new TEDx community program, this year’s TEDIndia Conference and the annual TED Prize.”
Another bonus, checking out this website makes me feel intellectual again.
[Posted by Shannon]
This video is just plain terrifying. The completely plastered woman in the video stumbles off a Boston train platform and falls onto the tracks. Being too drunk to process that she is in extreme danger, she just lies there. Passerbys on the platform wave frantically to the incoming train, because the conductor can’t see that the woman has fallen. The conductor can tell something is seriously wrong and puts the brakes on early. The train stops literally on top of the woman, but miraculously doesn’t hit her.
When interviewed, the train conductor said she didn’t do anything heroic – just that she followed emergency procedure. While she couldn’t tell exactly what was wrong, she sensed it was something serious by the way the people on the platform were attempting to signal her and how they were standing so far beyond the yellow line. I wonder if this brush with death will inspire drunk lady to lay off the sauce.
[Posted by Shannon]
Filed under news, random, technology, weird, YouTube
Oh huzzah, huzzah! It’s Friday! My heart is singing because I have been dreaming about sweatpants all day long and I can now see a light at the end of the long 9-5 tunnel. But that has nothing to do with today’s YouTube clip of the day. Silly me.
I love this video. This should be unsurprising because I genuinely wish that my life was a lighthearted musical. Things like flash mob dances and giant sing-alongs give me hope. Sigh. Anyway, I think these people are on to something. There are two more videos from The Fun Theory, which is run by Volkswagen. Das most clever!
Have a wonderful weekend, y’all!
[Posted by Kathleen]
Filed under adventures, blogging, crushes, education, humor, pop culture, random, weird, YouTube
It’s almost Halloween, one of my favorite holidays, and I am freaking out because I have absolutely no idea what I want to be. I feel like this year needs to be particularly good, since I was so entrenched in the campaign last year I didn’t even realize it was Halloween. Somebody call the wahhhhhmbulance.
Anyway, my beloved HuffPo has posted some hilariously adorable costumes for babies. Perhaps I’ll just take one of the ideas and adjust it a bit. I’m thinking the WALL-E costume would be super cute in my size. No? Okay. I always forget that Halloween means I’m supposed to dress skanky.
Click here for the slideshow!
Speaking of last year’s election (Yes, yes, I KNOW that’s it’s almost been a year since the election, but this study just came out!) this news story kind of sucks for our male McCain voting readership. I have a feeling that demographic isn’t very high on this blog, but we are committed to reporting the strangest news to ALL of our readership.
According to a story from ABC news:
Republican men nationwide may have experienced a drop in testosterone levels the night Barack Obama was elected president, according to the results of a small study that found another link between testosterone and men’s moods.
But don’t worry boys, I’m sure you’ve gotten it back. I meant the testosterone. Not the election. Love you!
In case you’ve been living under a rock, here are some Youtube videos that you should have seen by now:
Teehee, it’s a drunk guy. And this one:
Cleverness abounds in the Democratic party! HUZZAH!
And ONE MORE THING. My friend over at Herding Scapegoats has been writing again. You should probably check it out. He is providing a rare look into the male psyche, addressing serious things like male jealousy and pooping.
[Posted by Kathleen]
six words to change the world. 