Category Archives: technology

by | May 8, 2010 · 12:40 pm

you deserve a real nice guy!

Pandora (thank you, technology!) introduced me to this song. I enjoy the song, but even more than that I love that the lyrics are so dead-on. It’s both sad and hilarious, because we’ve all been there. (And if you haven’t been there, kindly get out of my life. I never liked you anyway.)

“We Get On,” Kate Nash

Simply knowing you exist ain’t good enough for me
But asking for your telephone number
Seems highly inappropriate
Seeing as, I can’t
Even say hi
When you walk by

And that time you shook my hand, it felt so nice
I swear I never feel this way about any other guy
And I never usually notice people’s eyes, but

I conducted a plan to bump in to you most accidentally
But I was walking along and I bumped into you
Much more heavily than I’d originally planned
It was, well, embarrassing
And I think you thought that I was a bit of a twat

I just think that we’d get on
I wish I could tell you face to face
Instead of singing this stupid song
But yeah, I just think that we might get on

So I went to that party and everyone
They were kind of art-y
And I was wearing this dress
Because I wanted to impress
But I wasn’t sure if I looked my best
‘Cause I was so nervous
But I carried on regardless
Strutting through each room trying to find you

And when I saw you kissing that girl
My heart, it shattered
And my eyes, they watered
And when I tried to speak, I stuttered
And my friends were like “Whatever!
You’ll find someone better!
His eyes were way too close together!
And we never even liked him from the start!
And now he’s with that tart
And I heard she’s done some really nasty stuff
Down in the park with Michael
He said she’s easy
And if your guy’s with someone that’s sleazy
Then he ain’t worth your time
‘Cause you deserve a real nice guy!”
So I proceeded to get drunk and to cry
And lock myself in the toilets for the entire night

Saturday night I watched channel five
I particularly liked CSI
I don’t ever dream about you and me
I don’t ever make up stuff about you and me
Because that is insanity
I don’t ever drive by your house to see if you’re in
I don’t even have an opinion on that tramp that you’re still seeing
I don’t know your timetable
I don’t know your face off by heart
But I must admit that there is still a part of me that still thinks
That we might get on

We might get on…

Yep, sounds about right.

Love “Foundations,” too (holler HLH!). Terribly literal video, but a great song. I’m so happy that Ms. Nash’s accent actually comes out when she sings. Why can’t more people make that happen?

[Posted by Mallory]

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by | December 28, 2009 · 11:26 am

a quick post from the airport.

Mornin’, world! I’m waiting at my gate ready to head to Philly to stay with my favorite Korean correspondent and her family! While there, I will witness the baptizing of a few demons (yes, that’s right), drink at cheap bars in the suburbs, and eat way too much food. Guest Blogger SWTCTW Shan will be there for a bit, and if you’re lucky, we’ll work in a joint post among all the tomfoolery.

I just went through security, and things were fine — the line goes quickly when you’re, um, reading Texts from Last Night on your phone. But while waiting, I saw an interesting sign that was supposed to be recognizing one of the TSA guys for his hard work. The sign talked about how this guy speaks Turkish, German, and Italian fluently, and to that I say “IMPRESSIVE!” After that, the sign commended this guy for his security screening skills, which were exemplified when he spotted a loaded firearm in the x-ray machine. Now, that’s great. Really. I’d prefer to not have any loaded firearms on my flight. But isn’t that the most basic and essential aspect of his job? Shouldn’t we EXPECT the security dudes to be able to spot LOADED FIREARMS on the security belt? I’m not even a trained TSA official, and I think I might be able to catch that. It might be more commendable — and worthy of a sign — if, say, the employee had spotted two tiny containers of liquid that could be mixed together to blow up a plane. Or something.

I’ll catch you on the East Coast, yippee!

[Posted by Mallory]

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by | December 23, 2009 · 7:15 pm

do babies poop in the womb?

My sister and I were watching this show about multiples on TLC, and as we were watching, she turned to me and asked, “Do babies cry in the womb?” And…I didn’t know. I mean, I don’t know anything about babies! Maybe they cry and we can’t hear them because it’s muffled by the womb? Maybe this is a totally stupid question?

Obviously, to try to figure out the answer to this burning question, we Googled it. But first, we let “do babies” sit there in the search box so we could see what the average person asks about babies. And oh dear god, I haven’t laughed this hard in a while:

I can’t even pick my favorite. Are there REALLY that many people out there wondering if babies have kneecaps?! (And as funny as I find these questions, I can’t definitively answer many of them…)

UPDATE: Babies DO cry in the womb! (This is from a website called BabyCenter, and it seems legit):

Yup. MSNBC did a cool medical in depth a few years ago on what a fetus does while gestating. All of the doctors in the study agreed that there is ultrasound proof of late term fetus “crying” as a result of being startled. Of course there is no sound (as noise is produced by air moving across the vocal chords), but what they are doing is crying, complete with gulps and chin quivering. Pretty damn cool.

[Posted by Mallory]

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by | December 8, 2009 · 7:54 pm

today is a google holiday, hooray!

Today’s Google Holiday: What would have been the 115th birthday of E.C. Segar, the creator of Popeye. Anyone ever been to Chester, Illinois? That’s where E.C. — or lil Elzie, as I’d prefer to call him — was born and raised. Chester residents love them some Popeye, and to prove it, statues of various characters from the cartoon are taking over:

In 1977, Segar’s hometown of Chester, Illinois honored its native son with a park named in his honor. The park is home to a six-foot-tall bronze statue of Popeye, and since 1980 has been the site of the annual Popeye Picnic, a weekend-long event that celebrates the character with a parade, film festival and other activities. In 2006, Chester launched the ambitious “Popeye & Friends Character Trail,” which links a series of statues of Segar’s characters located throughout town. Each stands on a base inscribed with the names of donors who contributed to its cost, and is unveiled and dedicated during the Popeye Picnic. The 2006 debut sculpture of hamburger-loving Wimpy stands in Gazebo Park. A statue of Olive Oyl, Swee’Pea and the Jeep, located downtown near the Randolph County Courthouse, followed in 2007. In 2008, a Bluto statue was dedicated at the corner of Swanwick and W. Holmes Streets, in front of Buena Vista Bank. The 2009 statue of Castor Oyl and Bernice the Whiffle Hen stands in front of Chester Memorial Hospital. An additional 11 statues will be unveiled at the rate of one per year until 2019, when a bust of Segar at his birthplace will mark the cartoonist’s 125th birthday. To keep the slate on schedule, one year will feature two dedications, with the Sea Hag as the “wild card.”

What I was Googling: lucas welch liza chambers

Now go eat some spinach and raise a glass to lil Elzie.

[Posted by Mallory]

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by | December 4, 2009 · 12:53 am

that song from the palm-pixi commercial.

I’m disappointed that this year’s holiday iPod commercials don’t have a song for me to get addicted to.   Same for the GAP ads.  So this year’s top contender for best song in a commercial is (drum roll):  the Palm Pixi!

I don’t know why, but I love it.

[Posted by Shannon]

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by | November 12, 2009 · 11:34 pm

boston train almost hits drunken woman.

This video is just plain terrifying.  The completely plastered woman in the video stumbles off a Boston train platform and falls onto the tracks.  Being too drunk to process that she is in extreme danger, she just lies there.  Passerbys on the platform wave frantically to the incoming train, because the conductor can’t see that the woman has fallen.  The conductor can tell something is seriously wrong and puts the brakes on early.  The train stops literally on top of the woman, but miraculously doesn’t hit her.

When interviewed, the train conductor said she didn’t do anything heroic – just that she followed emergency procedure.  While she couldn’t tell exactly what was wrong, she sensed it was something serious by the way the people on the platform were attempting to signal her and how they were standing so far beyond the yellow line.  I wonder if this brush with death will inspire drunk lady to lay off the sauce.

[Posted by Shannon]

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by | October 7, 2009 · 11:49 am

today is a google holiday, hooray!

Two people tipped me off to today’s Google Holiday (thanks, Amelia and Kels!), which has caused people the world ’round to be all “Uhhhh is my computer broken?” But don’t worry, people, your computer isn’t broken! It’s just Google being its wacky self. Let me share the email I received as my second tip this morning:

I realized after I typed this gem [pictured below] in that today is a google holiday! I was actually a little concerned because I just thought that it was my computer being broken. Also, you might wonder, gosh, why was Kelsey googling “mase, money, anus”? And the answer to that is that I am an embarassingly white girl who is completely out of touch with American pop culture, so I didn’t understand a lot of this website. Now I do though!

Ladies and gentlemen, meet my best friend from home! You probably should go to that website, just to understand why Kelsey’s search makes sense, and also because it’s entertaining.

Today’s Google Holiday: Invention of the Bar Code. Today marks the 57th anniversary of the first bar code patent. And guys, we should celebrate, because how else could we buy Cheetos with such ease? Here, read more. (And also maybe let me know how it’s possible that Wikipedia updates things the second they happen. It already knows about today’s Google Holiday…cah-raaaazy.)

What Kelsey was Googling: mase, money, anus

bar code

[Posted by Mallory]

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by | August 21, 2009 · 3:27 pm

what type of facebooker are you?

I thought after I graduated from college, I would become less of a Facebook fiend.  Sadly, I’m in my sophomore year after graduation and I probably spend more time on the social networking black hole than ever.

I enjoy cyber-stalking on Facebook just as much as the next guy, but there are several types of Facebookers that drive me absolutely insane.  This article categorizes them perfectly.  Without a doubt, the Sympathy-Baiter is by far the worst, followed closely by the Chronic-Inviter.

ifacebookedyourmom

By the way, if you read this article and believe yourself to be none of the above, there is a good chance that you are all 12.

[Posted by Shannon]

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by | August 19, 2009 · 11:13 am

study proves gamer stereotypes are true.

This just in from the Department of Things that are Unsurprising:  A new survey shows that the average U.S. gamer is overweight, 35 years old and depressed.

This study was conducted by the CDC in the Seattle-Tacoma area.  CDC’s Dr. James B. Weaver said,

“Health risk factors, specifically a higher BMI and a larger number of poor mental-health days, differentiated adult video-game players from non-gamers,” he said. “Video game players also reported lower extraversion [sic], consistent with research on adolescents that linked video-game playing to a sedentary lifestyle and overweight status.”

Image from vortexgames.com

Image from vortexgames.com

Does anyone else find this to be really disturbing?

Last weekend I was in Indianapolis for a wedding, which fell on the same weekend as Gen Con Indy– a gaming convention.  Walking around, our high heels and party dresses were a stark contrast to the sea of gamer costumes: elves, pirates, warrior princesses.  Not to go all Carrie from Sex and the City on you, but I couldn’t help but wonder–besides the costumes, what is it about gamers that really sets them apart from the rest of us?

While we non-gamers are surely not to blame for the natural chemical imbalances that lead to depression, what is our role in ostracizing gamers from mainstream society?

Perhaps we lack the imaginative spark they manage to hold on to, and we mock them for it.  That being said, there must be another outlet for imagination and creativity besides a video game.

We all understand what it’s like to feel comfortable in a community of like-minded people.  (My comfort zone is other political wonks and campaigners who, to some, may seem like weirdos. Unlike gamers, however, we tend to be painfully extroverted.  It takes a certain kind of person to actually like knocking on doors and talking to strangers.) And if the study had said the average gamers were mostly happy and healthy, I would say “live and let live” and then make a crack about how they probably still live in their parents’ basement.

But that isn’t the case.  We now have data pinpointing a distinct community of people who are depressed and unhealthy.  Now we just need to figure out what to do and how to reach them.

[Posted by Kathleen]

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by | January 8, 2009 · 1:33 am

department of things that are unsurprising.

Kathleen and I are currently sitting next to each other on my couch, wearing matching J.Crew yoga pants, typing on our matching elitist white MacBooks, with our matching jaunty ponytails, watching The Daily Show and playing on the Internets. Could we BE any more DC right now? Or any more liberal? Or any more elitist? Maybe, but only if there was a life-size cutout of Barry sitting between us, wrapped in a down comforter.

[Posted by Mallory]

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