Happy Labor Day, ya’ll! I hope you’re enjoying the three day weekend! As I was contemplating how I DO NOT have today off, I realized that I had no clue as to the real meaning and history of Labor Day (Wiki that) other than it’s the end of summer (wahhhh) and I can’t wear white until Memorial Day. Ugh. This is especially distressing to me because I have a killer pair of white pants that I didn’t get to show off this summer. Well, I tried to show them off. What happened to me was very traumatic. No, I didn’t spill anything on them. It’s even worse.
I realized that time was running out, so I brought said pants to Denver, for the D amazing NC. Saving the best for last, I waited until Thursday to wear them. So I woke up a little late on Thursday and got dressed. White pants, classy black top. I felt good. Like vintage J-Lo. My mother walks into the hotel room. She’s wearing white pants and a classy black top. A wave of panic hit me harder than when the Spice Girls broke up. It’s okay to admire your mother–it is not okay to dress like your mother. At least not when you’re 22! Am I becoming my mother?! I thought I had more time before the transformation took place! Haha. In vain she tried to tell me it would be alright, that nobody would notice. But I could already feel the judgmental eyes on me as I walked next to her on the street. I’d even mock me. I quickly changed into an inferior outfit, and the white pants were thrust back into my suitcase, untouched by the summer sun.
Yup, that’s it. I have been trying to think of some way to turn my white pants story into an allegory of sorts, but I’m afraid it’s too shallow for that. There is, perhaps, some message here. I might have better off if I had just listened to my mother and worn the white pants. Or more likely, it didn’t matter at all. 🙂 Yes, I just emoticoned. What of it?
While today is not its official end, I hope that you all had a lovely summer. It went by so fast, didn’t it?
[Posted by Kathleen]
Remember that great “Yes We Can” video with all of the famous people in it that made you feel all tingly and Democratic and in love with Barack Obama? Well, according to CNN’s Political Ticker, it’s going to be recreated live on Thursday before Obama’s speech. I can’t exactly understand how that’s going to work, but I’ll leave that to the music folks to figure out. Hooray for Kathleen, who gets to actually be there. As for me, I’ll be chasing my tequila with a shot of bitter jealousy.
Presumably, Will.i.am will be there, and CNN tells us that Sheryl Crow, Stevie Wonder, and Jennifer Hudson are also performing. Plus, rumors are still flying that Mr. Bruce Springsteen himself will make an appearance. If that is true, my anger over the fact that I’m not in Denver right now may lead me to explode, right there in whatever DC bar I happen to be in.
So that I can calm down, and for your enjoyment, let’s watch the “Yes We Can” video together and just breeeathe.
[Posted by Mallory]
So I considered live-blogging Hillary’s speech but then I got nervous because Kathleen is way smarter than me when it comes to politics. Now I wish I had live-blogged it. From a nerdy rhetoric student’s point of view, and a weepy patriot’s point of view, and the point of view of some one who thinks Barack Obama looks damn good in a suit, that was a GOOD speech.
She got the weepy stories in; she did some great McCain bashing; and she did an excellent job hammering home the message of “HEY CRAZY LADIES! Voting for McCain or voting for no one is NOT the way to honor my campaign’s legacy. VOTE FOR BARRY!” or something to that effect. And that Sisterhood of the Traveling Pantsuit comment? The Harriet Tubman rhetoric at the end? Killer. Love her right now.
And I will say, though the orange suit complemented Hill’s skin tone, I thought orange was an interesting choice for the patriotic overload that is a convention. With all the Obama campaign’s branding strategy, I thought it was odd that they allowed Hillary and Chelsea to appear next to each other wearing orange and black. Anyway, Michelle looked great, as per usual, and Joe Biden has really white teeth.
Stay tuned for Kathleen’s potentially more legit commentary, once she gets off the Pepsi Center floor. Lucky bitch.
P.S. I spoke to my mom before the speech, and she said she and my dad were also getting ready to watch. This shocked me a little, because my dad is a bit of a diehard Republican. My mom was talking about how they were kind of bashing Hillary on the teevee commentary and I was like whaaaa?, because I was watching NBC. Of course my parents were watching Fox, because my dad said it was “the most neutral station.” Tee hee.
P.P.S. I’m watching Fox now because I got curious, and Charles Krauthammer is speaking. Like a month ago I applied to be his research assistant. Never heard back, shockingly. It was one of those jobs that you just have to send in your resume for, so don’t judge me.
[Posted by Mallory]
Okay, so I think the story behind this Wonkette headline is a leetle terrifying. First, take a look at the six-word masterpiece:
“Meth-Mouths Jailed In Obama Assassination Plot.”
Um, slighty scary, right? The backstory is that a bunch of strung-out crazies may have been plotting to kill our boy B at his acceptance speech at Invesco on Thursday night. According to CBS 4 News in Denver, so far four people involved in this assassination plot — Nathan Johnson (pictured above), Tharin Gartrell (also pictured above), Shawn Robert Adolf, and Natasha Gromek (Johnson’s girlfriend) — have been arrested on drug or weapons charges:
One of those suspects spoke exclusively to CBS4 investigative reporter Brian Maass from inside the Denver City Jail late Monday night and said his friends had discussed killing Obama.
“So your friends were saying threatening things about Obama?” Maass asked.
“Yeah,” Nathan Johnson replied.
“It sounded like they didn’t want him to be president?”
“Yeah,” Johnson said.
Maass reported earlier Monday that one of the suspects told authorities they were “going to shoot Obama from a high vantage point using a … rifle … sighted at 750 yards.”
Sources told CBS4 police found two high-powered, scoped rifles in the car along with camouflage clothing, walkie-talkies, wigs, a bulletproof vest, a spotting scope, licenses in the names of other people and 44 grams of methamphetamine. One of the rifles is listed as stolen from Kansas.
The appropriately named Adolf was wearing a swastika and apparently has ties to a white supremacist organization, and Johnson told the CBS reporter that “He [Obama] don’t belong in political office. Blacks don’t belong in political office. He ought to be shot.” Riiight, because intelligent white people like Adolf and Johnson are infinitely superior to PERFECT PEOPLE LIKE BARACK OBAMA.
Now, I’m hoping these guys are just crazy and their brains are broken from a little too much meth, and that this isn’t actually some elaborate, well-planned assassination plot. Because the thought of that makes me very nervous. Hey Barack? Please, PLEASE don’t get shot.
[Posted by Mallory]
Because I’m such a DC local now (someone even asked me for directions today! No word on whether they made it to their destination safely, but I’m optimistic…), I read the free little daily newspaper that you pick up on the street. It’s basically a dumbed down, easy-to-digest version of the Washington Post. Today there were some pretty interesting celebrity tidbits, so I thought I’d share those and other pieces of news with you, dear readers:
- Brace yourselves for this first one, folks: Chris Kattan (or Mr. Peepers to you) has filed for separation from his way hotter model wife. They had been married for a staggering eight weeks. In fact, Kathleen posted about the nuptials back in June, and because she is such a wise, wise blogger, she was already skeptical. [People]
- Lady rapper Da Brat was sentenced to three years in prison for — wait for it — smashing a hostess over the head with a bottle of rum last Halloween. Yo ho ho, eh? An intergalactic high five to anyone name a song she sang… [Inside Track]
- So the Olympics are over. Thank goodness we have the DNC to casually watch now so that we don’t have to turn back to watching reruns of The Hills. Kathleen will be reporting live from MY Mile High City, and I’ll be doing world-changing things like going to class and watching the speeches on the teevee. Didn’t love Pelosi’s speech today, and didn’t get to see the Kennedys’ because I was…um…watching Jon & Kate Plus 8.
- The Brits (the English? When I was abroad my English friends got very angry if we called them British) are the new Americans, at least when it comes to drinking heavily in foreign countries and giving your own country a bad name. Great quote from the mayor of Malia, a popular resort town in Greece: “They scream, they sing, they fall down, they take their clothes off, they cross-dress, they vomit.” Sounds like a normal Thursday to me. [New York Times]
- So, this is kind of old news, but Tucker Max is making a movie. Now, I used to be one of those people who thought he was HI-larious and I stalked his website and maybe met him once, sober, at a sketchy bar in downtown Richmond. (And I’m ashamed to admit that not one but TWO of my acquaintances have “known” Mr. Max in a different way. I feel dirty just thinking about that.) Now that I’m a super mature college graduate, though, I’m kind of over the Tucker Max thing. I prefer to make my own embarrassing stories. Anyway, according to several people one set, Tucker is miserable to work with. [Gawker]
And just in case you thought this blog didn’t teach you anything, know this: my little sister (who, in her slight defense, has been living under the rock known as sorority rush for the past two weeks), correctly answered an extra credit question in class today because she knew the name of the new Dem VP nominee. The only reason she knew that answer? By reading this here blog. Take THAT, legitimate news sources.
[Posted by Mallory]