Category Archives: fashion

yo, this is my new face-lift.

Inject me, doctor

According to this article from today’s New York Times, in order to defray costs for their patients and to tap into some (almost) free, very personal advertising, some plastic surgeons have started offering cash incentives for patients who choose to put videos of their surgeries on YouTube. Aside from the major EW factor (which, as someone who tends to be against plastic surgery and who can’t so much as stand the surgery scenes in Nip/Tuck, I find pretty damn creepy), there are all sort of ethical questions. The main question is how much trust potential patients can put in these videos when the person raving about the treatment has been paid to rave. In some cases, it’s no small chunk of change: one Beverly Hills surgeon discounted a woman’s face-lift from $12,000 to $3,800 in exchange for the patient posting her before-and-after video on YouTube. Wowza.

I’m too chicken too watch any major surgeries, but at your own risk of boredom, take a look at this Botox video. If you want to actually see the injection, which is just as boring as the rest, go to about 3:00 minutes in. 

Didn’t think cosmetic surgery could ever be so boring, did ya?! Also, I love that this woman’s hair is stuck in the ’80s, even though her cosmetic medical treatments are totally modern.

One New York doctor, who pays his patients significantly less to go public than the Beverly Hills surgeon, doesn’t see the money as having any major ethical effect on the advertising. I love this quote:

“If it were truly a conflict of interest, then 90 percent of the patients would do it because it would be so worth their time,” Dr. Chynn said. “New Yorkers are so busy. They’re not in Kansas. We’re not talking about Dorothy and Toto.”

Um, touche? (And way to make an insulting, confused blanket statement about Midwest there, Dr. Chynn.) But with costs of plastic surgery so high, it’s no wonder that many people disagree with Dr. Chynn. In fact, one of his patients (who underwent Lasek surgery, which is different from Lasik in ways that I don’t care to get into/don’t understand), essentially said that he’d do the promotional video no matter what the circumstances were: “I’ll do anything to save money,” he said.

I suppose that you could argue that the discounted costs are making this whole plastic surgery thing a little more egalitarian. (Face-lifts and breast implants aren’t just for Hollywood’s rich and famous anymore! Now even you frumpy Kansas women, with all that time on your hands, can go under the knife too!) Personally, I think it’s just plain weird.  But who knows? Maybe when I get all wrinkly and have real bills to pay, I’ll appreciate the discount, and the fifteen minutes of fame.

P.S. One of the patients interviewed for the article is named Jiffy Reed. Got a thing for peanut butter, there Mom and Dad?

[Posted by Mallory]

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cover shot: barack and rolling stone.

Well, folks, looks like our favorite hopeful candidate is gracing the cover of Rolling Stone this week (his second cover). And I must say, he’s looking good. Apparently, it’s a pretty big deal that the cover is headline-less. (The other famous wordless cover is that weird one of a naked John Lennon death-gripping Yoko with his thighs, which I’ve always found pretty creepy, even though a lot of people seem to like it.) So hey, congrats, Barack!

Rolling Stone doesn’t post the full article online, but I’ve been able to browse through some snippets of the interview with Obama, and I’m particularly excited to see that we Barack out to similar music: Bob Dylan, Bruce Springsteen, Elton John, the Rolling Stones. Not too shabby.

In the piece I watched about this cover on The Today Show (and yes, this morning I also suffered through the awkward Today Show wedding), some analysts thought that a cover like this makes it too easy for Obama to be pigeonholed. But the Rolling Stone has always been openly political (and liberal), and has featured Bill Clinton, Al Gore, Howard Dean, and John Kerry on its covers throughout the years (along with Richard Nixon and W, but for slightly different reasons), so I don’t think Obama is making some kind of radical statement that people need to get freaked out about.

What I find a little more…unusual…than the Stones cover is the fact that Donatella Versace came out with a fashion line dedicated to and inspired by Hopey. Here’s what blog Highbrid Nation had to say:

In a move that has shocked both the political and fashion arenas, Donatella Versaceannounced that her Spring/Summer 2009 collection, which she presented in Milan on Saturday is dedicated entirely to presidential hopeful Barack Obama.  Versace said he the line represents “a relaxed man who doesn’t need to flex muscles to show he has power.” Needless to say this has NEVER happened before…big pimpin’….

Bizarre, but pretty freakin’ cool, too. I don’t anticipate a McCain-inspired line of hair pieces, hearing aids, and Stepford wife arm accessories to be coming out anytime soon, so Obama’s got a leg up there. Take a look at the Donatella’s Baracouture:

Yellow mandals? Ouch.

[Posted by Mallory]

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posh would never wear these things.

Now I’m aware that the fashion gods decided that platform shoes are in again. I also must acknowledge that I tend to love Free People, as it is a brand that enables my not-so-secret desire to be a hippie. (A fake, well-dressed hippie, of course.) But those shoes! Look at those things! I don’t think the Spice Girls would have even worn them back in the ’90s. And according to their description, they have a terrifying four-and-a-half inch heel. As a 5’11” girl with a general dislike for heels, height like that is enough to make me woozy. (The image that just popped into my brain as I pictured myself wearing the monstrosities: a just-born foal with its wobbly little legs, stumbling all over the place.) So uh, anyway, these shoes are hideous, happy Friday, and will someone please bring me a breakfast sandwich?

[Posted by Mallory]

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the devil is in the details.

This morning, as I watched our country’s most legitimate television news show, The Today Show, Meredith Viera told me about a legal case that puts the McDonald’s hot coffee case of 1994 to shame. Fifty-two-year-old traffic cop Macrida Patterson is suing Victoria’s Secret over an injury she received FROM HER THONG. Her thong. Apparently, the rhinestone heart attached to Ms. Patterson’s “undergarment,” as her lawyer called it on the show, was attached by two staples. As Ms. Patterson was putting the thong on, one of these staples flew off and hit her in the eye, leaving her in “excruciating pain,” and in need of a dose of topical steroids. (By the way, the case was filed a full year after the incident occurred.)
 
Now, this story is funny enough as it is, but watching Meredith try to make a legitimate interview out of it was pure hilarity. And watching Ms. Patterson’s lawyer, Jason Buccat, trying to maintain some dignity while discussing the case was even better. (The defendant herself also seemed to be having a hard time keeping a straight face.) One of my favorite lines: When Meredith asked Macrida if this was the first time she’d worn the thong, Macrida replied with something along the lines of, “No, it was the second or third time I’d worn it. I have a lot of underwear from Victoria’s Secret so I don’t need to wear any of them too frequently.” The line that takes the cake, though, was from the mouth of proud lawyer Jason Buccat: “Victoria’s Secret does have its angels, but the devil is in the details.” How long do you think he spent working on that one?
 
I think the real lesson here is that rhinestone hearts do not belong on thongs (or on anything else, for that matter). If you’re rocking that kind of “undergarment,” you’re just asking for a corneal abrasion.

[Posted by Mallory]

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bikes, boobs and a hemp g-string.

Oregonian (Oregonite? Oregonese?) woman Jen Moss is pissed because people just don’t understand her need to bicycle around topless and are prohibiting her from riding in the Fourth of July parade. According to the AP, Moss is known for riding her bike “free and independent of all clothing but a hemp G-string”. In fact, she’s known as “The Naked Lady”.

I get the naked part (let the girls get some air), but the hemp G-string sounds questionable at best. You know, back in the day aka 8th grade, I was quite good at making hemp necklaces with cool beads and whatnot. I gave them as gifts to my friends. Maybe now since our tastes have matured, I can make them all hemp G-strings with cute little beads! AHHH! But back to business.

The Ashland Chamber of Commerce is in a battle right now over this. In Moss’ application she said she wants to lead a group of rollerbladers in her hemp booty floss, “blowing a conch shell.” Blowing what wearing what? Errr… Whatev, she sounds like an inspirational leader (those rollerbladers are bound to follow her, along with every creepy man within 50 miles) and America is all about leadership!

Clearly she is a great patriot and loves America. Come on people, it’s the Fourth of July. It’s not like your children haven’t seen boobs before. Let Jen parade!

[Posted by Kathleen]

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baby you should always walk tall.

Hooker heels for babies? Ha! What will they think of next? I’m currently trying to think of a play on the phrase “baby mama”, but nothing good comes to mind that doesn’t make me feel pervy and like I need to go to confession for just being a bad person. (Catholic guilt will always get you). I could never put a baby in something slutty, but this soulless, pagan, oh-so-cleverly called Heelarious, company has no problem with it. Here is what they have to say for themselves:

“WARNING: May cause extreme smiling and hysterical laughter when in use (this is completely normal).”

The nerve! Clearly, people are screaming left and right about children being pressured to get sexier at a younger age. Hey Miley, good job fueling that fire! You crazy kid!

I say, what the hell, I could have used the practice. That’s a joke people, but then again, so are these heels and I get that. Calm down and don’t get your diapers in a twist.

[Posted by Kathleen]

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