Category Archives: news

a friendly SWTCTW public service announcement.

 

Thanksgiving is tomorrow!  I hope that all of our lovely readers will get to spend it surrounded by friends and family and with yummy, delicious food.  Ready for the guilt trip?  Just like every year, this year there will be many individuals and families whose tables are empty and this year, there will be even more. 

Nationally, demand at local food banks is up 25-40% as more middle class families, who used to be donors, are seeking assistance in this troubled economy.  Donations have either stayed at the same rate or increased slightly but not enough to cover the increased demand.  This will be a continued problem, through 2009, but the Holidays are a great time to start helping.  Please visit Feeding America (formerly Second Harvest of America) to find a food bank near you and see how you can help.  A lot of families rely on their local food bank to put food on their table so please, keep them in mind.  Any donation will be greatly appreciated and will help to feed a family in need. 

So that’s our PSA.  We’ll get back to the snark shortly. 

[Posted by Madeline]

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a fun game for your friday.

Ashlee Simpson and Pete Wentz had a beautiful, healthy baby boy. And they named him Bronx Mowgli. Yeah, that Mowgli. I’m all for creative names, but I think parents should consider the mockery factor. Ashlee and Pete didn’t seem to do that. Maybe Ashlee is displacing her anger about the misspelling of her own name onto her infant son. 

Our Southern belle correspondent tipped us off to this wonderful story, and with the help of Marie Claire UK, we came up with a fun game. You know how you can make up your own porn name or soap opera star name? Well, now you can also make up your own Ashlee Simpson baby name. Here’s the formula:

[One slightly shitty U.S. city + One cartoon animal name]

Here are some examples:

Harlem Tarzan

Compton Simba

Watts Baloo

Scranton Shrek

Our fun new game will sweep the nation. Tell us your favorites in the jump.

UPDATE: FINE, due to some complaints from our favorite readers, let’s change this up a bit:

[One location in the U.S. + One cartoon animal name]

[Posted by Mallory]

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what the hell was she thinking?

Praise be to the goddesses of pop!  Britney’s back!

It seems that she has finally gained some perspective on her, um . . . hiatus, and she’s ready to explain all in an MTV documentary (also known as the “True Life” to end all “True Lifes”).  The documentary airs on November 30 but you can see the trailer here!

For the sake of her children and pop music as we know it, I’m glad Britty’s back.  I was by no means one of the faithful (holler, Walsh) who thought this day would come but I embrace it.  After all, I slow-danced to “Sometimes” in middle school, “Drive Me Crazy” still makes me covet Adrian Grenier, and “Toxic” got me through AP Bio senior year of high school.  So, welcome back Britney.  We salute you by sharing our favorite Britney moments with our SWTCTW friends and watching more trailers.

She looks so happy!

[Posted by Madeline]

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random stuff from the ny times.

Did you guys know about this

EDGERTON, Wis. — When a 15-year-old comes into Wile-e’s bar looking for a cold beer, the bartender, Mike Whaley, is happy to serve it up — as long as a parent is there to give permission.

“If they’re 15, 16, 17, it’s fine if they want to sit down and have a few beers,” said Mr. Whaley, who owns the tavern in this small town in southern Wisconsin.

While it might raise some eyebrows in most of America, it is perfectly legal in Wisconsin. Minors can drink alcohol in a bar or restaurant in Wisconsin if they are accompanied by a parent or legal guardian who gives consent. While there is no state law setting a minimum age, bartenders can use their discretion in deciding whom to serve.

Thanks to Katie, our fake hippie correspondent, for the tip. Interesting article.

And phew, Alaskans didn’t re-elect a convicted felon. Congrats to Mark Begich, numero 58.

[Posted by Mallory]

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madam secretary: bitches get stuff done.

Finally, it’s official!  Hillary Clinton is Barack Obama’s nominee for Secretary of State!  Technically we all “knew” this weeks ago but the journalism major in me couldn’t write about this until it was the real deal.

This is pretty awesome.  First of all, because Hillary is awesome.  Maybe she’s a little coarse but she’s also intelligent, visionary and deeply devoted to serving this country.  Plus, she’s BFF with Madeleine Albright, my idol and all-time favorite person ever.  So, if Hillary ever needs some extra advice she has one of the greatest Secretaries of State in her speed dial. 

Speaking of which, here they are, my two favorite Secretaries of State:0305

As this is, sadly, not a video you can’t tell that here Madeleine Albright is actually saying “you know, I think we should offer that delightful guest-blogger, Madeline, a job.”  And Hillary is saying “That is a wonderful idea!  I will call her right away.” 

Despite the fact that Hillary was the United States’ foremost ambassador during her years in the White House, visiting 60 countries with the mission of promoting American values and policy abroad (hmmm that sounds kind of like what the Secretary of State does . . .), there have been some distubing reactions to her nomination.  According to a Reuter’s article titled “Women see Clinton job as triumph, disappointment,” some women are still pissed that Hillary’s not the prez.  Do I think she would have made a great president?  Absolutely.  BUT LET’S MOVE ON (Hillary has). 

Most disturbing was this quote from Carol Jenkins, president of the Women’s Media Center in New York:

“Secretary of State has become the women’s spot — a safe expected place for women to be. In the ideal world, we’d see woman as Treasury secretary and throughout these ranks (of government).”

HOLD UP.  Now that three of the U.S.’s 67 (including Hillary) Secretaries of State have been women it’s a woman’s spot?  I was a liberal arts major so I could be wrong but I think that math’s a little fuzzy.  And hey, LADY!  You’re the president of the Women’s Media Center so what’s with the bad press?  Secretary of State is the highest cabinet position and fourth in the line of presidential succession.  Why are we insulting the position at all, let alone now that a woman is about to be in charge?  Seeing more women throughout government would be great but we’ll get there; and in the meantime let’s not insult those who are not only filling these positions but working to improve women’s rights around the world. 

And you know what?  If Secretary of State has become “the women’s spot” it’s for one reason and one reason only: bitches get stuff done. 

Vodpod videos no longer available.

[Posted by Madeline]

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newest boomers have obama to thank.

Oh boy. Or, girl.  This week’s Newsweek explores the possibility of an Obama Baby Boom and the opportunity for “that’s what she said” jokes alone makes the article HI-larious.  Let’s start with the lede:

The theory is almost too perfect to be true. Barack Obama the son of politically progressive parents, was born Aug. 4, 1961—almost nine months to the day after John F. Kennedy was elected to the White House. Is it possible Obama was conceived on that historic night?

Um. Ew?  I freely admit to being borderline obsessed with the President-elect and his family (What? No puppy until the Spring? Nooo!) but there are some things that I really just don’t need to know.  While Newsweek offers little (okay, nothing) in the way of statistical proof and only anecdotal evidence for the possible Obama Baby Boom, the term “Obama Baby” has already been defined by UrbanDictionary.com as “a child conceived after Obama was proclaimed President by way of celebratory sex.”  Want to hear it used in a sentence? 

“On election night, my husband had managed to down a bottle and a half of wine in celebration and he was all about making an ‘Obama election baby’,” Abbi Whitaker, 32, of Reno, Nev., told NEWSWEEK. “He thought it would be the coolest thing.”

Mr. Whitaker, I assure you that you will be the only one to consistently consider that “the coolest thing.”  I’ve had the unfortunate experience, not once but twice, to hear about the conception of close friends from the conceivers themselves.  BELIEVE ME, there is nothing cool about it, no matter how crazy (ew) the story may be.  Your friends will not think so, your child will not think so, and his or her friends REALLY will not think so. 

Speaking of things that are not cool, Eric Davis of Minneapolis told Newsweek that during one of their election night celebrations, “my wife accidentally said, ‘Oh, Obama!'”  Awkward . . . Feel free to put post-election euphoria to good use and get busy but it’s still important to say the right name. 

Is the Obama Baby Boom a real phenomenon?  Although demographic experts and physicians expect “a healthy increase” in births we won’t know for sure for another nine months. 

[Posted by Madeline]

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obama is president-elect and girls’ chauffeur.

The Obamas sat down with 60 Minutes’ Steve Kroft on Friday for the first post-election interview which airs tonight! at 7 pm! on CBS! Below, an impossibly sweet clip of future first lady Michelle discussing her reaction to her husband’s victory:

Vodpod videos no longer available.

Isn’t it nice to know that in just a few short months the White House will have a confident, intelligent, graceful first lady again? Laura Bush may have been the most agreeable part of W.’s tenure but she never embraced the role of First Lady in the way that I think Michelle will. Where she was a sweet, and kind librarian, Michelle will be an outspoken and courageous leader.

In the interview, President-elect Obama also discusses protecting homeowners from foreclosure, aiding the auto industry, his relationship with Treasury Secretary Henry “Hank” Paulson, and the writings of Abraham Lincoln. This is important stuff, don’t miss it!

[Posted by Madeline]

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’til avatar affair do us part.

cakestrangler1

Internet love is pretty common these days and sadly, divorce is even more so.  So on the surface it’s not too surprising to hear that a British couple is divorcing after meeting in a chat room in 2003.  But, of course, the devil is in the details.  Indeed. 

The chat room where Amy Taylor, 28, and David Pollard, 40, met was on a virtual community called “Second Life.”  They had each created an avatar and eventually, all four of them fell in love.  Six months after their first “lol” they had moved in together and in 2005 they married.  They even held an online ceremony for their avatars. 

However, it seems that happily ever after was not to be.  The couple recently split after Amy caught her husband’s avatar getting cozy with a “Second Life” prostitute.  Ouch.  Calling Pollard’s act “the ultimate betrayal” Taylor hired a “Second Life” private investigator in search of further proof.  The virtual P.I. caught Pollard’s avatar participating in some extramarital activities and he apologized to both his online and real life wives. 

Taylor says Pollard is now engaged to the virtual prostitute despite never having met in real life.  Don’t worry about Taylor though, she says she has also found internet love again.  This time, in the virtual community “World of Warcraft.” 

Here’s a picture of Pollard with his new girlfriend:  second-life-385_433000a1

And Pollard and his “real life” wife (for now, anyway):mr-and-mrs-pollard1

At least they’re happy.  Right? 

[Posted by Madeline]

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the pregnant man is pregnant. again!

Thomas Beatie, the transgendered man who made headlines earlier this year by simply being a pregnant man, has got a bun in the oven!  Congrats to Thomas, his wife, Nancy, and their baby girl, Susan!  Susan, the competition starts now, kid.  You have to be the perfect oldest child, just like the rest of us first borns!

There’s nothing snarky to say about this, nor should there be.  Everyone is entitled to happiness.  Read the story and watch Thomas’ interview with Barbara Walters here.

And here are some pictures:

It’s really quite remarkable, isn’t it?

[Posted by Kathleen]

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batman to sue batman. confusion ensues.

Holy identity theft, Batman!  The mayor of Batman, Turkey, Hüseyin Kalkan, is going to sue Christopher Nolan– director of The Dark Knight (Heeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeath! Wahhhh!).  The reason?  Over use of the name, Batman.  No, seriously?  Can someone please tell Mayor Kalkan that Batman has been around since the 1930s?  So suing the director of the most recent film…not that logical.  Thanks.  But whatever.  Could this story get any more absurd?

Kalkan also blames a series of unsolved murders and a high female suicide rate on the psychological impact suffered by the town after being placed under the spotlight by Nolan’s film. In addition, Batman expats living abroad have experienced legal issues when trying to use the name to set up businesses, he claims.

Yup. It just did.  You know, maybe the Turks should stop naming their cities after OUR superheroes.  Yes, I’m talking about you Wonderwoman, Turkey and Aquaman, Turkey.  I jest, I jest.

I think the real problem is that the city of Batman NEEDS a Batman to solve its problems.  Suing Batman is not the way to get on his good side, Mayor!  You’ll never get a Bat Signal.  Or, call me crazy here…but instead of suing a major movie studio that will probably win the case, you should put your city’s funds towards crime prevention…

What are your thoughts?

[Posted by Kathleen]

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