So our Argentine correspondent just sent this phenomenal video to me. Try to watch it without grinning, or if you’re a freak like me (and don’t you WISH your girlfriend was a freak like me?), prepare to cry a little, with joy:
Happy Inaugural Weekend.
[Posted by Mallory]
Filed under adventures, dance, humor, music, YouTube
Today, as many of you know, is the start of the eighth season of American Idol (and there’s a new judge, Kara DioGuardi, who seems saucy!). Funny, I can only name a couple winners…and a few losers. (Clay Aiken, I’m talking about you!) The best part of the show is seeing the auditions. Remember William Hung? Yeah, he released a full album. But my favorite audition of all time has to go to the one and only Mary Roach. Perhaps someone tonight might top it, but I seriously doubt it. Enjoy the musical talents of Mary Roach!
Mary Roach, you will always be my American Idol.
[Posted by Kathleen]
Filed under blogging, celebrities, humor, music, pop culture, random, the arts, TV, YouTube
As Mallory reported earlier, Joe the Plumber is now Joe the Reporter, reporting from Israel. For Pajama Media, whatever that is. (I frequently blog from my bed, am I part of Pajama Media?) Essentially, after watching one of his videos, I would ever-so-kindly, but bluntly, suggest that he stick to plumbing. Let’s take a look at it, shall we? Watch Joe the Buffoon give his version of the straight talk to the media (and be a huge horse’s ass) here. Best part is how he says “I’m not the story”, (as he points to the dude with the Kenny G. hair in a ponytail. That hair is newsworthy.) but clearly, he is. And that’s how he likes it.
Somehow, this joker managed to get about two solid weeks of press attention. The first time was just chance, but every time after that, it was because he wanted it. Ooh, Joe is going on the campaign trail with McCain! Ooh, Joe isn’t ruling out a run for Congress in 2010! Ooh, Joe just got an agent! Now, if he didn’t want publicity, why would he hire an agent? After all, he’s just a regular guy! My favorite Joe moment, up until now though, was after the election when Joe decided to backstab McCain and Palin. Yup, that got him another 15 minutes of fame.
So here is the transcription of him confronting “The Media”. Dun dun dun…
JOE: The story here is people are being killed and the media’s slanting it and trying to make it Hamas is, uh, as far as, that Israel’s being bad. Do you believe Israel is bad?
Oooh! Good question, Joe! Has Israel been naughty?
REPORTER: Do I believe it?
JOE: Yeah, do you?!
Do ya, punk?
REPORTER: I’m Israeli, so…
JOE: So answer the question!
Objection! The reporter is badgering the…reporter!
REPORTER: No, I don’t think Israel is bad.
JOE: Do you think Israel has every right to protect itself?
REPORTER: Yeah.
[pause]
JOE: You do?!
REPORTER: Yeah.
It’s called preparation, Joe. It’s quite simple. You see, if you think of questions beforehand, you don’t have to stall and have awkward pauses.
JOE: Have you said that on air?
REPORTER: I’m just a reporter.
Yeah, Joe. You really nailed this one.
Ahhh, and that is why I cannot be a reporter. Because being able to have public opinions about things, such as Joe the Plumber, is just too much fun to pass up.
[Posted by Kathleen]
Filed under blogging, celebrities, humor, news, politics, pop culture, random, thoughts, travel, weird
Forget the chapel, Paul and Caragh Brooks of Illinois entered the covenant of marriage sitting in a booth at a Taco Bell on Friday, Jan 9. The courthouse was booked, and they needed another option. No, I didn’t make that up. “Going to the T-Bell and we’re gonna get married, goin’ to the T-Bell and we’re, gonna get married.” Okay, sorry, I had to do that.
Fatties like me customers continued to buy their 4th meal of the day while the ceremony took place. The employees blew up balloons and displayed taco sauce packets that say “Will you marry me?”. I didn’t know they made those, but that’s cute. The bride wore a $15 hot pink dress. The groom’s mother loved the ceremony. The reception was held right there, with guests ordering right off the menu. You know what I have to say about that? YUM! All in all, the wedding costs the couple $200.
Now of course you want to know the ‘how we met story’. Well, take a guess how they met. Okay, now read this.
Caragh Brooks, 21, of Australia, met Paul Brooks, 30, on an Internet dating Web site. They already had the same last name.
The couple wrote back and forth and talked on the phone for nine months before Caragh Brooks moved to the United States.
Yup.
“We have the same brain, just in two bodies,” Paul Brooks said. “We think alike in virtually every manner. We have the same interests, viewpoints.”
I’m going to go out on a limb here and say that one of those interests might be Taco Bell. What do you know? I’m right!
He proposed on New Year’s Eve and, because they like to spend time at the local Taco Bell, they decided to wed there.
Naturally, of course!
The best part of all? This happened in a town in Illinois called Normal. NORMAL. Isn’t it ironic? Don’tcha think?
As critical and quick to point out the abnormalities as I may seem, I’m only kidding and I’m honestly really happy for them. If you decide you want to spend the rest of your life with someone, I guess it doesn’t really matter how you decide to do it. These two are eccentric. Also, they paid $200 for a wedding that I won’t ever forget…and I wasn’t even there. Imagine spending $30,000 on the most cookie cutter wedding imaginable, and then having people groan about “another wedding” when they get the invitation.
You’ve got to give them some credit for having it their way. Hold on. “Have it your way” is the BK slogan. Maybe that would have been more fitting? That aside, congratulations to Caragh and Paul!
[Posted by Kathleen]
I have a friend who loves bacon. Let’s call her Katie, because that’s her name. In college, we would make fun of her for sneaking scraps of bacon off of our plates when we weren’t looking. She once toyed with the notion of inventing bacon bread. Bitch really, really loves bacon. And she’d do a lot for bacon, but I don’t think she’d do this:
(That photo is officially the most awkward one I’ve ever saved to my Desktop.)
Ladies and gents — but really, just gents — meet the Bacon Bra. Taco Bell is putting bacon in its burritos, so why can’t some random woman wear bacon for a bra?
My friend Doobie alerted me to this wonderful new invention:
doobie: so you wanna see the best invention ever?
me: YES!
doobie: http://www.stylelist.com/blog/2008/04/11/bringing-home-the-bacon-bra/
me: oh. my. GOD.
doobie: hahaha awesome right?
me: okay, but the bacon is raw
so youd have to like peel it off a boob and fry it before you eat it
doobie: hmmm id just suck it up
me: and eat the raw bacon?
doobie: yup
Oh, boys.
[Posted by Mallory]
Yes kids, it’s the last full week of George Bush’s presidency. Let’s celebrate! A big thank you to 23/6 for putting this little video together for us. LOVE the background music.
Vodpod videos no longer available.
Don’t go getting all nostalgic on me now! Dry your eyes!
[Posted by Kathleen]
Filed under blogging, celebrities, history, humor, news, politics, pop culture, random, the hill, thoughts, TV, Uncategorized, YouTube
Because I miss my best friend, and because she is a phenomenal Cry Facer, and because I haven’t posted a Hump Day Cry Face for way too long…
I swear, she’s pretty in real life. And if a pretty person can look this ugly, well, that’s a good Cry Face.
[Posted by Mallory]
Filed under adventures, cry face, humor, post-college depression
Um,
“Joe the Plumber becomes war reporter.”
That is funniest six-word headline I’ve seen all year! Because it is a joke! Right? Right? RIGHT?!
Ha ha ha ha no. It’s not a joke. Our economy has tanked, a hockey mom who doesn’t know a predicate from a condom was selected as a vice presidential candidate, and Joe the Plumber is going to Israel to be a war correspondent.
According to Wonkette and the Australian newspaper that penned that knee-slapper of a six-word headline, Joe the Plumber is headed to Israel on the behalf of Pajamas Media to report on the recent outbreak of conflict in the Gaza Strip:
Wurzelbacher said he was going to let “Average Joes” share their stories and get the real story of what is happening.
“It’s tragic, I mean it really is,” Wurzelbacher told Ohio television station WNWO.
“I don’t say that in any little way. It’s very tragic, but at the same time what are the Israeli people supposed to do?”Wurzelbacher said he was not concerned about heading into a warzone for a 10 days.
“Being a Christian I’m pretty well protected by God I believe. That’s not saying he’s going to stop a mortar for me, but you gotta take the chance,” he told WNWO.
And then, as if he has been taking public speaking lessons from Sarah Palin herself, he continues:
“If given the opportunity to do some good however minute it may be, or could be something really good, you gotta take that chance. You have to do it,” Wurzelbacher said of his new job.
Excuse me while I go put on my nightgown.
[Posted by Mallory]
Filed under humor, news, politics, pop culture
Picture your most humiliating nightmare. Perhaps you are naked in front of a crowd. Mine might involve looking like I was 13 again. You’re thinking about it now. Mortifying, is it not? Well some poor dude in Vail lived a very imaginative nightmare. Like the only funny scene from an unbearably unfunny Jim Carrey movie, he found himself dangling upside down from a ski lift san pants with his dangly parts totally exposed in the frigid cold. Errr… here are the pictures. You can’t make this shit up.
HAHAHAHA
And finally, he is showed some mercy.
Stifle your laughter, fools! The man suffered from exposure! Okay, you can giggle, because it is comedy of the absurd.
According to the press release, he was suspended for about seven minutes. NOT seven minutes in heaven, I’m sure. Pantsless man, I know nothing we, your fellow Americans, can ever do will erase the pain of this ordeal, but I propose that any time you go to a bar, your drinks are free. But you know who I feel worst for? His kid. Sitting right next to him. Hahaha. oh dear. Therapy much?
[Posted by Kathleen]
Filed under adventures, definitely not politics, humor, news, pop culture, random, thoughts
I rarely find beer commercials funny, but this one did make me laugh a little.
[Posted by Kathleen]
Filed under blogging, definitely not politics, drinks, humor, pop culture, religion, TV, YouTube
six words to change the world. 