Kathleen and I are currently sitting next to each other on my couch, wearing matching J.Crew yoga pants, typing on our matching elitist white MacBooks, with our matching jaunty ponytails, watching The Daily Show and playing on the Internets. Could we BE any more DC right now? Or any more liberal? Or any more elitist? Maybe, but only if there was a life-size cutout of Barry sitting between us, wrapped in a down comforter.
[Posted by Mallory]
Filed under blogging, fashion, politics, pop culture, post-college depression, technology, TV
Tony says PETA is grrrrrrrrrrrrrrreat! Errr…
or
Little Timmy wants a new cat.
[Posted by Kathleen]
Filed under animals, definitely not politics, fashion, news, pop culture, random, sex, six word memoirs
Picture your most humiliating nightmare. Perhaps you are naked in front of a crowd. Mine might involve looking like I was 13 again. You’re thinking about it now. Mortifying, is it not? Well some poor dude in Vail lived a very imaginative nightmare. Like the only funny scene from an unbearably unfunny Jim Carrey movie, he found himself dangling upside down from a ski lift san pants with his dangly parts totally exposed in the frigid cold. Errr… here are the pictures. You can’t make this shit up.
HAHAHAHA
And finally, he is showed some mercy.
Stifle your laughter, fools! The man suffered from exposure! Okay, you can giggle, because it is comedy of the absurd.
According to the press release, he was suspended for about seven minutes. NOT seven minutes in heaven, I’m sure. Pantsless man, I know nothing we, your fellow Americans, can ever do will erase the pain of this ordeal, but I propose that any time you go to a bar, your drinks are free. But you know who I feel worst for? His kid. Sitting right next to him. Hahaha. oh dear. Therapy much?
[Posted by Kathleen]
Filed under adventures, definitely not politics, humor, news, pop culture, random, thoughts
I rarely find beer commercials funny, but this one did make me laugh a little.
[Posted by Kathleen]
Filed under blogging, definitely not politics, drinks, humor, pop culture, religion, TV, YouTube
Every time I see a Louis Vuitton bag I just assume that it’s fake and you bought it on the street for 40 bucks. I can’t tell if you paid the full price for it, and I don’t care. Americans LOVE buying the fake stuff. I bought a fake Longchamp bag in Turkey for 12 bucks. (Because it was fake, I pronounced it Long Champ…like it SHOULD be pronounced. Silly French.) Anyway, whenever people would compliment my bag, I’d automatically tell them it was a fake. I mean, why should I pretend like it was real? That is my pet peeve about counterfeit items–when people act like they’re real.
My pet peeve is one of the reasons I have great admiration for a new shopping center in China. This shopping center is all about counterfeit items and is totally unapologetic. They proudly and purposefully spell things differently so as to avoid legal trouble, and it is HILARIOUS. God love ’em. For example, you can eat a pizza at a Pizza Huh. Huh? I mean, what? No, not a Pizza Hut, a Pizza Huh. Regardless, I’m sure you still have the shits “stomach issues” for hours post-gorge. After your delicious fake pizza, you can enjoy a fake coffee at Bucksstar and buy a “Naik” sweatshirt. Just do it! No but seriously, would you do it? For pictures and a legitimate news story, click here.
Are the Chinese on to something? Is the answer to consumerism, or is it perpetuating it? Whoa deep thoughts. I need something mindless…maybe I’ll catch up on some GG. You know you love me.
[Posted by Kathleen]
Filed under blogging, definitely not politics, fashion, humor, news, pop culture, random, thoughts
On this fine Sunday, I had the pleasure of seeing one Kathleen Shea Blogger. In fact, it was the first time we’ve been together since we began this here blog. We had brunch with our friends, chatted, had a naked pillow fight, etc. We also went to see The Reader with our friend Norah.
The Reader is the third movie I’ve seen in the past few weeks that I wasn’t originally intending to see. I saw Slumdog Millionaire because I missed Four Christmases, Seven Pounds because The Curious Case of Benjamin Button was sold out, and now The Reader because Milk was sold out. Someone’s really screwing with my movie schedule, but luckily I’ve loved each of these three movies.
I had some vague ideas of what The Reader was about, and I’d heard that it got good reviews. I’m no film buff, but I quite liked it, and I thought Kate Winslet, Ralph Fiennes, and newcomer David Kross were all phenomenal. It’s a twisted, sad movie, but I thought it was original and thought-provoking.
The questions of justice that the film brings up were most interesting for me. Modern law requires an assignment of guilt or innocence with no real middle ground, and this movie illustrates just how complex and contrived that requirement can be. My inability to come to terms with the whole black-and-white aspect of law is part of the reason I decided not to go to law school. I’m bad at making decisions to begin with, and even if assigned a side, I think I’d struggle to be 100% on that side. (There are exceptions, of course, and I’m oversimplifying our legal system, but you get what I mean. I hope.)
On a lighter, creepier note, I finally understood exactly what my cougar friend means when she looks at a younger guy and says she wants to give him a bath. Not that I don’t still find that statement totally creepy (you heard me, Cougar Friend), but I got a little embarrassed when I formed a huge crush on David Kross, the young Michael in this movie, and then discovered that he is only 18. Here’s the only picture I found of him where he looked as if he’d hit puberty (he’s on the left, clearly):
Yeah he still looks young. I feel dirty. But whatever, suburban moms totally have crushes on the Jonas brothers, right?
And let’s just pause and remember how fabulous Kate Winslet is, even when she’s just hanging around with her kid:
I’ve had a few strangers tell me I look like Kate Winslet, and I every time I see a picture of her or watch one of her movies I try and I try to force myself to see the likeness, and I simply don’t see it. The face is a stretch, and our bodies…well, let’s just say I don’t see it.
Here’s a preview for The Reader:
If you see it, let us know what you think!
[Posted by Mallory]
Filed under celebrities, crushes, movies, pop culture, sex, YouTube
Yes, it is Christmas eve and I am blogging. What of it? But I have to share this with the world. In case you didn’t know, the best movie EVER is on the teevee for a solid 24 hours straight. Twenty-four hours of “A Christmas Story”? YES PUHLEASE! I’ll watch it inbetween meals. So turn on TBS. This movie makes me laugh so hard I cry. The scene with the leg lamp? PRICELESS!
Fa ra ra ra ra, ra ra ra ra!
Also, in case you wanted to keep tabs on the big guy in red, the North American Aerospace Defense Command, or NORAD, has a Santa tracker going. As of right now, he’s in between the South Pole and South America. He best be getting to the US of A tonight! Specifically, my house.
Merry Christmas! I hope Santa is good to you!
[Posted by Kathleen]
Filed under adventures, blogging, definitely not politics, family, humor, movies, news, pop culture, random, thoughts, TV
A few months ago, I ordered myself a Rolling Stone subscription on some sketchy website using my super sweet student discount. I never saw an issue of the magazine, so I figured I had been scammed. Little did I know, the magazines were somehow coming to my home address, so there was a stockpile of them waiting when I arrived in Denver at 3 a.m. last night.
Flight delays are fun, huh? I checked into the airport in DC at 12:30 p.m. and arrived in Denver well over twelve hours later thanks to the clusterfuck that was the Boston airport. Not that I’m really complaining. I had Dave Egger’s What Is the What with me, which provided many hours of distraction along with the perspective check of, “Hey, waiting in a climate-controlled airport with plenty of food and water for half a day is not even remotely bad when compared to walking through the Sudanese desert for months, starving and half-naked.”
In general, I’m just glad I was able to get home last night and didn’t get stuck for a few days. (I’m also glad that I wasn’t in the position of these poor people on a flight out of Denver last night.) Plus, my luggage never left Boston, so I’ve been able to justify not leaving my couch because, you know, I don’t even have any CLOTHES to wear in public.
Which leads me back to my real point: I love Rolling Stone. For starters, I always feel pretty damn cool reading it, a la William Miller in Almost Famous. But I really, erm, read it for the articles. I started with the oldest magazine so I could read them in chronological order (OCD, people. OCD), so I’m back in mid-November reading articles about the election and the bailout. Naomi Klein’s article on the bailout made me veddy veddy angry, and Matt Taibbi’s roundup of his favorite moments on the campaign trail made me even happier to be an elitist liberal. Take this quote, for instance:
“The collapse of the Bush administration left the Republican Party utterly bankrupt of ideological advantage. The Bush era made it impossible to sell the party as fiscally conservative ($10 trillion deficit), militarily superior ($12 billion a month fighting a handful of Arabs in sandals to a blood draw), or even as the party of ‘moral values’ (a raft of Republicans caught offering to suck off strangers in restrooms or texting little boys on the Internet).”
Politically correct, Taibbi is not. But still, GO BARRY.
So if you need me over the next few days, you can find me on my couch, in my high school pajamas, weeping into a Rolling Stone as I watch Extreme Makeover: Home Edition.
[Posted by Mallory]
Filed under adventures, music, news, politics, pop culture, TV
The Beverly Center in LA gives you two choices when it comes to your mall Santa. Naughty or nice. So you can go sit on bowl full of jelly Santa’s lap, or you can sit on six-pack Santa’s lap. Meet Eli Wilhide, pictured above, this year’s Hunky Santa. RAWR! Only in California! But I think this should be a feature at every mall.
And, just because I can, here is one of my favorite Christmas songs. Sometimes it makes me produce tears.
[Posted by Kathleen]
Filed under blogging, crushes, definitely not politics, news, pop culture, random, sex, YouTube
We all have hobbies. I like to think of mine as travel (because that sounds cool), but it’s probably reading US Weekly and the Huffington Post nonstop. For Jim Bob Duggar and his wife, Michelle, I would venture to say that their hobby is having babies. The Duggars just welcomed their 18th child into their crazy world. Little Jordyn-Grace Makiya was born on December 19. Now I love babies. I coo at every one I see. I love the little clothes, the little shoes, etc. Perhaps I’ll have one or two in my lifetime. But my god, the thought of 18 babies WITH NO INTENTION OF STOPPING makes me a little queasy. Yes, Jim Bob told the press “We both would love to have more”. Sure, buddy. Michelle Duggar has been having children for over 20 years. And as if it couldn’t get any more bizarre, here are their names and ages.
Joshua, 20
Jana, 18
John-David, 18
Jill, 17
Jessa, 16
Jinger, 14
Joseph, 13
Josiah, 12
Joy-Anna, 11
Jeremiah, 9
Jedidiah, 9
Jason, 8
James, 7
Justin, 6
Jackson, 4
Johannah, 3
Jennifer, 1
Jordyn-Grace, 0
ALL J NAMES? WHY WHY WHY? (Ginger with a J? Seriously?) You could probably guess this by the freakshow nature and all the babies, but the Duggars have their own show on TLC. It’s called ‘Seventeen and Counting’. That’s original. But will they have to change the name now? This family seems a little strange. I’ll take ‘Jon & Kate Plus 8’ anyday. They are awesome.
[Posted by Kathleen]
six words to change the world. 