This video is so goofy. I love it. And I wish so badly that I had a twin, because I would do stuff like this ALL THE TIME.
[Posted by Kathleen]
Category Archives: random
moms plus email equals great fun.
Boys and girls, I may have discovered my new favorite website: postcardsfromyomomma.com. The website allows people to upload actual emails from their mothers for our viewing pleasure. As the daughter of a momma who sends very interesting texts and emails, I can certainly appreciate this site. (She loves middle-school IM lingo like brb and lol and where r u.) And although my mother is extremely entertaining, it is Kelsey’s mother who sent the best momma text message known to man.
You know how moms write as if text messages, IMs, and emails are real letters? Well, Kelsey’s mom was sending a text to Kelsey’s brother and attempted to start it with a cordial “Dear Warren.” Unfortunately, predictive text got the best of her, and she accidentally sent the message early, so Warren received the following message, unprovoked, in all caps:
FEAR.
Excellent, no? Makes me laugh every time.
[Posted by Mallory]
not so subtle, eh, lilly mcelroy?
Oprah also told me about a 28-year-old performance artist named Lilly McElroy who likes to do things like lie on the ground and take pictures of herself, hug strangers, and throw herself at men (literally). Now lying on the ground in public places is kinda dirty and odd, and I must admit I’ve always wanted to give away free hugs to strangers, but throwing yourself at unsuspecting men? That’s the most fascinating. McElroy describes it as “an unabashed attempt to make a connection.” Um, sure. Once the shocked stranger catches her (as he hopefully does), then what? “Um, hi! I’m Lilly. Thanks for catching me, and have a wonderful day.”
You can look at a couple of other photos of flying Lilly on her website, but this photo pretty much sums it up:
Happy performing, Lilly.
[Posted by Mallory]
mal’s hippie quote of the day.
As I’ve mentioned, I’m on vacation with my family up in the mountains. We’ve had a lot of time for lounging around on the gorgeous back porch, which overlooks the mountains, and while lounging I’ll read almost anything. That includes The Oprah Magazine. Yeah yeah, I know. But I’ve actually read a lot of interesting things that I want to share with you! The first is the following excerpt from a poem called “Sweet Darkness,” by David Whyte:
You must learn one thing.
The world was made to be free in.
Give up all the other worlds
except the one to which you belong.
Sometimes it takes darkness and the sweet
confinement of your aloneness
to learn
anything or anyone
that does not bring you alive
is too small for you.
Great, right? (Read the rest of the poem here, and please ignore the terrible Comic Sans font.)
[Posted by Mallory]
Filed under random, Uncategorized
just six words and a picture.
Here is Mariah Carey (or should I say Mrs. Nick Cannon. How did that happen? Drumline was so good!) on the August cover of Elle Magazine. Wowie.
All hail the power of Photoshop.
[Posted by Kathleen]
Filed under celebrities, random, six word memoirs
mom, i’m marrying a serial killer.
To take a quick break from sports, I’m going to write about another popular topic on SWTCTW- strange weddings. (For evidence of this, please click here and here) Everyone has heard the jokes about marriage being a life sentence and whatnot. This story is the perfect combination of all these things in a sick and twisted way. Oh man, my mind is whirling with puns and bad jokes that I could make. Okay, maybe just one… Nihita Biswas can literally call her future hubby the old ball and chain.
Confessed French serial killer Charles Sobhraj, who is 64 and serving a life sentence in Nepal, is engaged to marry Nihita, a 20-year-old Nepalese girl. Here is their how we met story: they met when she was applying to be a translator for one of his lawyers. (Cute? No?) Oh, and he is best known by his criminal nickname, “The Serpent”.
There are so many things wrong with this! Besides the whole killing people thing, I don’t think I could ever marry someone with a nickname that sounds like it comes from a Batman movie! (Sidenote: I am so excited for the new Batman movie. Why, Heeeeeeeeeeeeeeath, why? I love you.) What are his evil powers, besides the obvious? I wish this was an episode of Scrubs and you could see what goes on in my head. Damn my wild imagination.
Even though you can’t see what goes on in my head, use your own to imagine the conversation she had with her mother. Moms essentially all ask the same basic questions when it comes to learning about the new man in her daughter’s life. What is his name? What is he like? What does he do? Or in the case of marriage, they ask when the date for the wedding is. For the Serpent and his lady, this all depends on whether the Nepal Supreme Court accepts his appeal and let’s him out of his life sentence. Good luck with that. The point is, not one answer to any of the basic questions is good! How do even you answer ‘what does he do’?
Instead of answering all of these questions for the news story, the blushing bride to be commented on the 44 year age gap between them.
“I am mature enough to decide for myself,” she said. “Age does not make a difference.”
Age is the least of your worries, hun. I think your number one priority should be, umm, staying alive.
The Frenchman has in the past admitted to killing several Western tourists, and he is believed to have murdered at least 20 people in Afghanistan, India, Thailand, Turkey, Nepal, Iran and Hong Kong during the 1970s.
So this story isn’t quite Sunday New York Times wedding announcement material, but it’s still a wedding announcement. Congratulations to the happy couple? I demand an invite and there best be an open bar.
Here she is:
And here he is (looking mysterious and somewhat dapper?):
[Posted by Kathleen]
youtube clip of today: the muppets!
Okay, so, I KNOW it’s not still Independence Day, but it is still Independence Day weekend. Plus, patriotism is always allowed. I’ll admit it. I’m easily entertained, but this is kind of funny. It’s the Muppets, for christ’s sake! Plus, Beeker is really cute.
[Posted by Kathleen]
Filed under celebrities, random, YouTube
my olympic dreams may be attainable.
I have found it! The sport that I am going to pursue to get to the Olympics. I used to think I was going to get there on the US Curling team, but I realize that I hate cold weather and I’m not entirely sure what the point of Curling is…so….summer sports it is! Back in 1996, I used to dream of being an Olympic runner. HA! I still haven’t really left my bed since waking up this morning and it’s past noon. So imagine my intrigue when I realized walking was an Olympic sport! That’s right, an Olympic sport. All of a sudden, the Olympic theme is pounding in my head and I’m having sports glory visions. I imagine myself hanging my Olympic gold next to my Pulitzer and Nobel prizes, smiling, eating a tub of frosting, watching a Disney movie and calling it a night. But back to reality. I could walk for miles! I have large calf muscles and long legs, this sounds great!
Upon my research (aka I frantically Wikipedia’ed it), I learned a couple very important things. One foot always needs to be on the ground while racewalking (that is the sport’s official term) so it isn’t running and, according to Wikipedia, “The second rule requires that the supporting leg must straighten from the point of contact with the ground and remain straightened until the body passes over it.” Sure, whatev.
Most racewalkers walk at a pace that is faster than those rare times when I do go for a run. Ouch. So I realize I have some training to do. And many racewalking Olympians are as old as Dara Torres. So I’ve got time! Here is a video of competitive racewalking. Don’t they look like a bunch of penguins or something? What comes to mind for me is a girl I graduated high school with that swung her hips like that in an attempt to look sexy. Hmm.
Dear readers, I’m going to end this post with a confession and a little known fact: Mallory and I used to be powerwalkers. It’s true–we used to powerwalk in the neighborhood adjacent to our beautiful campus. But I’m serious about my Olympic dreams. So look out for me and Mal in 2012 when we hit the streets of London not running, but walking at an incredibly fast pace.
And just because, here is a goofy YouTube video I found on racewalking. I have to say, the use of the Cake song in this is pure genius.
[Posted by Kathleen]
that john denver’s full of shit.
On Friday, totally spur-of-the-moment, Kelsey and I decided to go meet up with some friends in the mountains for the Fourth. I’ve never spent a Fourth of July in the mountains, but I figured it would be a pretty wonderful way to celebrate America’s birthday. (Among the mountains that inspired “America the Beautiful,” no less.) Picture this: two ridiculously happy girls wearing ridiculously large sunglasses, riding top-down in a convertible blasting Paul Simon, driving west toward the mountains. So cliche, and so amazing.
We went to watch the fireworks at this large field/sports complex in Fraser (which is near Winter Park, for those of you non-Coloradans), and got to enjoy a live band and delicious brats and Coors Lights before freezing our asses off for about two hours. (Your mom was right: bring a coat. The mountains are ever so slightly colder than the city, and sundresses do not keep you particularly warm.) The freezing-our-asses-off part was worth it, though, because the fireworks show was amazing. Somehow we picked the best spot on the lawn, and the fireworks ended up being directly over our heads. Fabulous. I love how fireworks amaze and awe people from three to 93. We were a bunch of 21- and 22-year-old boys and girls (by technical standards, adults), and we were ooh-ing and aah-ing and screaming “WOW!” like a group of toddlers who had no idea what those lights up in the sky were. I love that.
If you haven’t noticed yet, I’m completely and totally obsessed with the state of Colorado. I’m not particularly outdoorsy, but I love that my state is, and I love living in a great city that’s only two hours away from some of the most amazing mountains in the world. It doesn’t get much better than that. You know that Baz Luhrmann song about sunscreen? Where he says “Live in New York City once, but leave before it makes you hard; live in Northern California once, but leave before it makes you soft”? To that, I’d add: Live in Colorado once. Period. You may never want to leave.
My camera drowned in a Blue Moon shower last weekend, so I didn’t take any photos while I was up in Fraser, but the area basically looks like this:
And the drive up looks something like this:
Pretty great, no?
[Posted by Mallory]
Filed under adventures, random
a little inspiration for your sunday.
As I’ve explained, I’m kind of a nerd. One symptom of this nerdiness is that I really love quotes. I get Quotes of the Day emails, and I’m pretty selective in choosing which quotes I love enough to add to my quote book (which I obviously have). I liked this quote enough to share it with all of you:
“Why shouldn’t things be largely absurd, futile, and transitory? They are so, and we are so, and they and we go very well together.” [George Santayana]
Pretty damn wise, right? In other news, every time I read a quote by George Santayana, I can’t help but think that I’m reading a quote by Carlos Santana. As it turns out, these two dudes are preeetty different. For starters, one of them is a dead philosopher, and the other is a living rock star.
Not a rock star…
Definitely a rock star…
Got it?
[Posted by Mallory]
six words to change the world. 