Monthly Archives: July 2008

by | July 18, 2008 · 1:56 am

youtube clip of today: run, emily!

Okay, so I usually only post videos that I can put into the post, you know, just to make things easier for you–I’m just that nice. But this video is SO funny, and SO good, that I am willing to overlook the fact that it needs to be linked. I hope you can too.

Click here, NOW.

Yay Emily! Run, girl! If I did this, my parents would be so proud! No joke. Though I do have to wonder, where did she think she was going? If you notice, she never really runs in a straight line. From what I remember from my nature classes as a child (yes, I was nature girl), this is the recommended technique to use when running away from creatures such as alligators. Or scary presidents. Emily, I think you’re really cool.

[Posted by Kathleen]

1 Comment

Filed under news, sports, YouTube

Tagged as , , , , , , , , ,

by | July 17, 2008 · 2:48 pm

tales from my morning news stalk.

Good mornnnnnnnnnnning! I have completed my morning news/gossip stalk, and because blogging about each of these would take all day I’m putting it all together in one glorious post. Don’t you judge me.

So now we find out that Jesse Jackson not only threatened the testicles of Saint Barack, he used the N-word too. Ohhh, no you did not! Here is what he said: “See, Barack been, um, talking down to black people on this faith-based – I wanna cut his nuts out. … Barack – he’s talking down to black people — telling n——s how to behave.” Bill O’Reilly, who broke the original story said they didn’t use this part because it was unnecessary. He called the person who leaked this (they don’t know who it is…yet) a “weasel” (that’s the pot calling the kettle black, Billy!) and then put the fear of God in us all but especially the poor sniveling soul that will eventually be homeless and miserable– “I have the waterboard over here. … We’ll find out.” As some of my friends say, “things that are unsurprising.”  You can read what I had to say before we learned Jesse dropped the N-bomb here.

But speaking of Barack, he pulled in a mere $52 Million for this quarter. No big deal. The Wonkette headline made me giggle: Hope Rides In On A $52 Million Unicorn. I assume the unicorn reference came from JibJab’s new video, which you can watch if you click here. Thoughts? Not as good as the Bush/Kerry one from 2004. But whatev.

One woman went for 20 years not knowing she had two monstrous tumors. When I say monstrous, I mean it. The tumors were just removed and she is now 140 lbs. lighter. ONE HUNDRED AND FORTY POUNDS. Damn, girl. Maybe there are two tumors where my love handles are? I should get that checked out.

Tonight should be amazing for political dorks who love great American pastimes in DC. It is the yearly Congressional baseball game, where all the politicians look to appear cool and revert back to their high school days. That’s right, the Republican congressmen and the Democratic congressmen, in a rivalry almost as intense as the Red Sox and Yankees, play each other. This is usually humiliating for the Dems, as the Republicans win every year. BUT DEMOCRATS ARE GOOD AT SPORTS TOO, OKAY?!

In TeeVee news, Scrubs is coming back for another season! Hoooray! Katherine Heigl managed to keep her miserable character on Grey’s for another season.

And for movies, The Dark Knight opens soon. Read anything on it, and they tell you that Heath was amazing. HEEEEEEEEEATH. WHYYYYYYYYYYYYYY. I can’t wait. Also, Mal posted about ScarJo’s singing, so I felt this is a little relevant: Defamer made a list of the Top Ten Unlikely Vocal Performances from Non-Singing Actors. Ugh, I HATE Tom Cruise. He deserves to be on no list other than Top Creepiest Person of All Time.

Happy news stalking!

[Posted by Kathleen]

Leave a comment

Filed under celebrities, movies, music, news, politics, pop culture, random, sports, TV

Tagged as , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , ,

by | July 16, 2008 · 8:22 pm

family feud: the brady bunch style.

Even the most perfect TV family is not so perfect- in real life. Florence Henderson, who played Mrs. Brady, and Christopher Knight, who played Peter Brady, are in a bit of a tiff. For those of you that aren’t VH1 whores like me and my friends, Christopher Knight met “America’s Next Top Model” winner Adrianne Curry (Tyra, girl, you messed that one up.) on “The Surreal LIfe”. They fell in love, apparently. “The Surreal Life”, by the way, is the most disasterous/repulsive of all celebrity reality shows. I’m willing to bet that 5/8 members have had a sex tape released on the internet. Yeah Mini-Me, I’m talking about you. The other beautiful coupling that has been derived from this show was Brigitte Nielsen and Flavor Flav. Give me a second, I need to go vomit.

Anyway, Knight and Curry went on to have their own reality show, “My Fair Brady”. To the genius that thought of the title: ouch. You slay me. And as you can imagine, hilarity, disaster and severe marital dysfunction have ensued.

So Flo told reporters last week that their marriage was a mistake and that they were pressured into it by the reality show, etc. She said, “They didn’t take my advice at all! And as you may have seen, they did get engaged and they did get married. Maybe I will counsel the divorce.” Let the record state that she is a certified hypnotherapist and the terrible twosome had asked for her help.

Naturally, Peter Brady is mad at Mommy. But guess what Peter/Christopher, old Flo (who now does denture commercials) is RIGHT. Adrianne Curry is a mess, and not in the hot Project Runway Christian Siriano way. And here is how you know things are really bad: he responded to his fake mom’s comments via his MYSPACE page. Ugh! Haha.

It is no secret Florence and Adrianne do not see eye to eye. In truth, I can empathize with both sets of views. But….in the struggle I have hoping one day these two women will bridge their generation and philosophical differences, calling my marriage a sham helps so very little.

I put forth the hope that opne day both Adrianne and Florence, both of whom have played an integral role in my life, will find a way to come together in a peaceful and respectful way. In the mean time, the sanctity of my marriage should not be called into question.”

Whatever, dude. You can’t expect to “marry” and reality TV train wreck and not have anybody watch or comment!

I’m anxiously looking forward to the rest of the Brady family getting involved. Man, this would have been a great episode.

[Posted by Kathleen]

1 Comment

Filed under celebrities, pop culture, random, TV

Tagged as , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , ,

by | July 16, 2008 · 7:57 pm

who has hobbies these days, anyway?!

I recently got an email from my grad school requesting some information for an internal “facebook” that will be passed out to faculty, staff, and other students. It asked for all the basic, easy stuff — undergraduate university, undergraduate major, favorite food — and then it hit me with a doozie: it asked for my hobbies. Uhhh…

I mean, who has hobbies anymore? In a perfect world, I’d be able to write “calligraphy, birdwatching, knitting, table tennis, and volunteering with refugees from Kazakhstan.” But folks, it ain’t a perfect world. If I were to be honest, I’d list “lounging, blogging, watching Jon & Kate Plus 8, drinking outdoors, eating, hanging out with friends, and, uhh, sleeping?” among my hobbies. Those don’t cut it, either. I turned to my sister for advice:

Maddy: Well, you like sitting.

Mallory: Maddy, I KNOW, but that doesn’t count. What about baseball games? I like baseball games! I’m watching one right now!

Maddy: You only like baseball games when you are eating a hot dog and drinking a beer and sitting in the Rockpile, where you don’t even have to watch the game.

Mallory: Touche. Ummmm…I’ve been, uh, running a lot lately…

Maddy: “A lot” might imply that you run marathons. You occasionally run for 20 minutes, and you hate every second of it.

Mallory: Concerts! I like going to concerts!

Maddy: [Rolls eyes.]

You see my dilemma. I settled on the following list of hobbies: reading (I really do like that! It’s generic, but whatever, beggars can’t be choosers); writing (I blog, and email my friends a lot); biking (well, see, I biked tons last summer and I think that if I put air in the tires, I’d actually use my bike a lot!); swimming (I used to be a swimmer in high school; now I enjoy sunbathing); and spending time with my friends (read: eating and drinking. A lot).

Sigh. Maybe my grandma can teach me to needlepoint.

[Posted by Mallory]

1 Comment

Filed under blogging, drinks, family, food, music, random, sports, TV

Tagged as , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , ,

by | July 16, 2008 · 7:24 pm

maybe he just wanted unlimited breadsticks.

Fueling the belief that Colorado is a place where people ride horses everywhere and still wear bolo ties, yesterday a “young adult black bear” broke into a Circuit City in Colorado Springs. Seriously. (That’s him above, caught on the security camera.)

According to the local ABC affiliate, the bear was lurking around a nearby Fazoli’s (looking for some chicken parm, we can only presume), and when the restaurant’s alarm went off he freaked out and ran over to Circuit City. He then shattered the sliding glass door, hung out for a while and compared prices on flat screen TVs, and ran out. He’s still on the loose. Perhaps he thinks he can get a better deal at Best Buy.

[Posted by Mallory]

Leave a comment

Filed under animals, food, news

Tagged as , , , , , , ,

by | July 16, 2008 · 7:14 pm

youtube clip of today: mmm spaghetti.

When you finish watching this, you’ll likely be wondering if someone slipped a rufie in the bottled water of the person who made this, or something along those lines–it’s very trippy. But then, you think about it, and this clip grows on you. People are so freaking clever. They somehow managed to find quirky, yet relevant, objects from Western (mostly American) culture. I especially love the post-it note butter. I’m hungry.

[Posted by Kathleen]

Leave a comment

Filed under pop culture, random, YouTube

Tagged as , , , ,

by | July 16, 2008 · 6:58 pm

even french dudes like cry face.

Dear readers, Happy Hump Day! Enjoy Kelsey’s French host brother’s Cry Face. And his jaunty hat. (Doesn’t he look distressed?! Maybe because we were forcing him to make an awkward face on the metro…)

[Posted by Mallory]

Leave a comment

Filed under cry face

Tagged as , , , ,

by | July 16, 2008 · 6:04 am

the baseball game that took for-ev-eeer.

Wow, what an All-Star game! Since Kathleen and I are practically professional MLB commentators, we have a lot of insight on the game. Because we like you, we’ll let you see some of the wisdom we passed back and forth while we watched:

Kathleen: this allstar game is absurd
Mallory: im glad youre watching! its nuts!
Kathleen: seriously!
Mallory: that uggla guy is a huge fuckup
Kathleen: haha never in a million years would i have pegged myself as the kind of girl to watch a baseball game all by herself at 1 a.m., but here i am

And then Kathleen blew me away with this one:

Kathleen: i love jd drew right now

Then we got extremely sophisticated in our analysis. If you don’t know a TON about baseball, you may not be able to follow this:

Kathleen: francona was really cute…did you see him freak out?
Mallory: yes that was adorable! i love baseball!
Kathleen: i feel so american
Me: im not even sad…theyre all so cute!
i like that shaggy one on the rangers
kinsler?
something like that
hes cute

And just so you know, Kinsler IS cute. Which is probably the adjective he strives for. See:

Soooo anyway, in case you live on the east coast and maybe have a job that prevents you from staying up until 1:45 a.m. watching baseball, I’ll fill you in. After a grueling 15 innings and almost five hours, the American League won this year’s All-Star game, 4-3. It was so intense that Kathleen and I both stayed up and watched until the end! That’s impressive! Besides Dan Uggla committing like 300 errors, everyone played really well, and I don’t actually know what I’m talking about so I’ll stop here. Good job everyone! Go America! Goodnight!

[Posted by Mallory]

1 Comment

Filed under crushes, sports

Tagged as , , , , , , , , , ,

by | July 16, 2008 · 3:17 am

confession: i’ve never been to fenway.


Mallory and I are usually on the same side with everything, but alas, I have found a difference between us: she supports the New York Yankees. Being that this blog is 50% mine, I will keep things balanced (but not “fair and balanced” because Fox News and their deceptive slogan makes me sick to my journalistic integrity-loving stomach) and talk about the Boston Red Sox. (Haha I love you, Mal!)

Those who know me know that I’m far more likely to know political scores than baseball scores, but come on, I do live in New England. And my journey to being a Red Sox fan is not a long one, but before you judge me and call me a fair-weather fan, hear me out. I grew up with Cal Ripken, the Orioles and Camden Yards. But upon moving to New Hampshire from Maryland my sophomore year of high school (I had one girl say to me, “New Hampshire? Isn’t that, like, up north somewhere?” Yes hun, it is.), I quickly realized that loving the Red Sox was not just a passion some people have; it is a way of life.

It didn’t come easily, but after awhile, I began to slowly develop affection for the Sox much like Belle for Beast in the Disney classic, “Beauty and the Beast”. Sorry, I had to throw that in. I spent hours watching the games with friends, a pastime I would never have done as an O’s fan. So I started off slow, just watching the games and learning the personalities of the players. Now, I have lived in NH for six years-and because of this I consider myself to be on the same level as a six-year-old child when it comes to my love for the Red Sox. My dad bought me my first Red Sox hat last year! Hooray!

But Mal and I have one thing in common despite our different sides in one of the deepest and longest of rivalries: I have never been to a game at Fenway Park, just as she’s never been to a game at Yankee Stadium. It’s humiliating, but true. I yearn for the day when I can join pretty much every other New Englander and say that I went to Fenway and saw the World Series champions.

So, if anyone wants to help me on my journey, give me a call. Take me out to the ball game. I love hot dogs. And beers.

[Posted by Kathleen]

Leave a comment

Filed under definitely not politics, random, sports

Tagged as , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , ,

by | July 16, 2008 · 3:14 am

at least she’s better than paris.

As most of you probably know, Scarlett Johansson is the latest actress to try her hand at singing. Here’s the official video for her first single, “Falling Down”:

Kinda weird, right? It’s not what I would have expected, and I have to admit…I don’t hate it. It’s almost wacky enough to be okay. Sure, the premise of the video is a leetle melodramatic, but all in all, I don’t think she totally embarrassed herself and ruined her career. If you forced me to listen to the song on repeat, I might change my opinion, but for now, I’m mildly in support of ScarJo’s singing career. What do you think?

[Posted by Mallory]

1 Comment

Filed under celebrities, music, YouTube

Tagged as , , ,