Category Archives: news

from the department of hilarious crimes…

As I’ve mentioned, I’m in grad school now and so occasionally I’ll get these safety alerts from my school about crimes that have happened in the area. Mostly the alerts scare the shit out of me and make me afraid to walk alone at night, but this one made me chuckle:

Please be advised that on Sunday, September 21, 2008 at approximately 3:30 a.m., a group of 12-15 white males and females broke into a private residence and stole a bronze bull’s head sculpture worth $25,000.

Ha ha! What is this, Ocean’s Eleven? 12-15 people?! Was this some sort of massive dare? A drinking game gone awry? An extremely ambitious ploy to get listed in the safety alert emails? Either way, it brightened my day a little. And compelled me to put my $25,000 bronze bull’s head sculpture in my vault.

[Posted by Mallory]

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i’ll see you at the pole.

Because I’m a super nerd, I like to look at Google Trends and see what the kids are Googling these days.  Obviously when I saw “see you at the pole” as one of the top terms, I had to check it out.  Do you know what immediately came into my head?  Stripping and pole dancers.  Perhaps “see you at the pole” is used as a challenge for pole dancers–like a walk off…but crazier.  Maybe we’re talking about Santa and the North Pole. I don’t know.

See You At The Pole is actually a day each year when Christian students gather at the flag pole and pray before school.  Ummm.  What a let down.

Two million students are expected to have participated this morning in the See You At The Pole 2008.

This raises questions of the separation between church and state.  While this occurs outside of school hours and is student led, should administrators be allowed to participate?  Where are the lines drawn?  What do you think would happen if I’ll See You At The Pole 2008 was all about devil worship?

Lots of thoughts for your Wednesday morning.

Pole dancing is way more fun to think about, right?  But what do you think?

[Posted by Kathleen]

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palin meets important people, remains worthless.

Aaaand all of this is actually painful to read.

I’m going to sedate myself with an issue of Real Simple and go to sleep.

[Posted by Mallory]

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Filed under humor, news, politics

mccain lied, i’m tired, the end.

I just had like a million hours of class — with the last class culminating in a raging debate over the format of our final — and then WALKED home so I’m kind of tired. I know, my life is really hard. But thanks to the New York Times News Alerts, I was among the first to read this little ditty, which I will cut and paste for your reading pleasure, because again, I’m tired.

McCain Aide’s Firm Was Paid by Freddie Mac

One of the giant mortgage companies at the heart of the credit crisis paid $15,000 a month to a firm owned by Senator John McCain’s campaign manager from the end of 2005 through last month, according to two people with direct knowledge of the arrangement. The disclosure contradicts a statement Sunday night by Mr. McCain that the campaign manager, Rick Davis, had no involvement with the company for the last several years.

You can read more about the issue here. As I’ve mentioned before, I don’t exactly understand this stuff, but here’s a little more info to help us understand:

 

Mr. Davis’s firm received the payments from the company, Freddie Mac, until it was taken over by the government this month along with Fannie Mae, the other big mortgage lender whose deteriorating finances helped precipitate the cascading problems on Wall Street, the two people said.

They said they did not recall Mr. Davis’s doing much substantive work for the company in return for the money, other than to speak to a political action committee of high-ranking employees in October 2006 on the approaching midterm Congressional elections. They said Mr. Davis’s firm, Davis Manafort, had been kept on the payroll because of his close ties to Mr. McCain, the Republican presidential nominee, who by 2006 was widely expected to run again for the White House.

Mr. Davis took a leave from Davis Manafort for the presidential campaign, but as an equity holder continues to benefit from its income. No one at Davis Manafort other than Mr. Davis was involved in efforts on Freddie Mac’s behalf, the people familiar with the arrangement said.

 

And all this is on the heels of the McCain campaign releasing ads tying Obama to Fannie Mae chiefs. Hmm. Nice straight talk there, Maverick. But don’t worry, America: my Belgian friend just assured me that Obama and Biden have it in the bag.

[Posted by Mallory]

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clay aiken is finally out? yawn.

America, get ready for a huge shock.  CLAY AIKEN IS GAY.  Errr…duh?  And who cares?  I know you were looking forward to the pictures of Clay’s kid (yes, he found someone to carry his child), but Clay decided to steal his infant son’s thunder with the gay bomb.  Then again, it’s hardly a bomb at all, given all the accusations of soliciting for sex in gay chat rooms…etc…etc…

So what I’m saying is that this is just as exciting as Lance Bass coming out.  As in, not at all.  I’m just happy for Clay that he can finally be himself.  Plus, his kid is cute.

[Posted by Kathleen]

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she’s back! and still really naked.

Remember Jennifer Moss?  I wrote about her a few months ago.  She was the lady who just wanted to patriotically parade in Oregon on Independence Day riding a bike, sans clothing?  Ahh, now you remember.  Well, she did have a hemp g-string…so she wasn’t totally nakey.  Sheeeeeeeee’s back!  And this time around, her name is being spelled by the press with a G.  So she’s Gennifer Moss.  No word on how that happened.

Anyway, she had a run in with the PoPo after construction workers–yes, construction workers (PRUDES!)–complained about her affinity for nude in-line skating.  Ummm…hello?  Do these men have mutated genetic codes?  I’m totally baffled.

From the Oregonian:

“We confronted her and told her that she couldn’t expose her genitalia,” said police spokeswoman Cathe Kent. “She complied.”

In other words, she whipped out a string bikini bottom and continued on her only slightly less Lady Godiva-like way.

Haha, that a girl, Gen!

The police said most of the calls they received from people other than the prudish construction workers weren’t complaints about her lack of clothing, but rather her personal safety.  Awww!  There is good in this world.

She now also goes by the nickname, Earth Friend Gen.  And she has her own MySpace channel.  Yes, she is naked in some of the videos, you sick group of perverts.  Watch the videos here.  She also posted pictures of herself…yes, naked as well.  One of the captions says, “I love being naked and free!”  No doubt about that, EFG.

Oh, Gennifer!  She’s totally cra-crazy, but you do have to admire her spirit.  Keeping rockin’ out with your boobs out, lady.  Whether that means riding a bike in a hemp g-string leading a group of skaters while blowing on a conch shell (FACT.  She actually wanted to do that) or letting all hang out while you skate around.  You’re kind of cool.

[Posted by Kathleen]

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Filed under fashion, news, pop culture, random, sex, Uncategorized

get well soon, travis, dj am.

Travis, the drummer from Blink-182, and DJ AM, a singer-songwriter who was once engaged to Nicole Richie, were in a plane crash late last night.  Four people died in the crash, but Travis and DJ AM (whose real name is Adam Goldstein) survived.  Both are in critical condition, according to their spokespeople.  They have been touring together as TRVSDJ-AM and played a show that day in Columbia, South Carolina.  Read the news story here.

Get well soon, guys.  Please.

UPDATED: There has been much speculation as to the other people who died.  Two were the pilots, but the names of the other two have not yet been released.  It has been confirmed that Gavin DeGraw was NOT one of the passengers, nor was Perry Farrell of Jane’s Addiction.

Travis:

DJ AM:

[Posted by Kathleen]

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palin wants to be on top.

On top of the ticket, that is.  Here she is at a rally yesterday talking about “a Palin and McCain Administration”.  Errr…ummm…pssst, Sarah.  Sarah?  When you are running for the number two spot (God save us all), you usually put the presidential nominee’s name first and then your own.  It’s just common courtesy.

How tacky.

[Posted by Kathleen]

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it’s talk like a pirate day!

Ahoy mateys!  Avast!  Today, September 19, is International Talk Like A Pirate Day. (For the official Web site, click here.)  Though not a Federal holiday, today is special in the salty hearts of many.  Arrrrrrr ye ready fer it?  First, go here to get your new pirate name.  And now, here are some pirate jokes, compliments of piratejokes.net.

Q:  How do pirates know that they are pirates?
A:  They think, therefore they ARRRR!!!!!
Q:  Why does it take pirates so long to learn the alphabet?
A:  Because they can spend years at C!
Q:  What’s a horny pirate’s worst nightmare?
A:  A sunken chest with no booty
Haha.  Shiver me timbers, those are bad!  But in that awesomely bad way. Right?
So have a Happy Talk Like A Pirate Day, me hearties.  Here’s some lingo for you.  Easy on the pillaging!
RARRRRR!
[Posted by Kathleen aka Cap’n Ramona Knockboots]

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Filed under definitely not politics, humor, news, pop culture, random, Uncategorized

happiness in tiny delicious dessert form.

If I could have any job in the world, I would like to own a candy store or a cupcake shop. Maybe an ice cream parlor. Something along those lines.

I’ve thought this for a long time. There is pretty much no happier place in the world than one of these shops. In high school, I used to work in a WONDERFUL candy store during the holiday season, and I loved every second of it. No one is ever pissed off while they’re buying candy. And if you work at a candy store, you get to nibble everything for free. Helloooo heaven.

The reason this comes up today is that my friends and I just discovered our own little piece of heaven in Georgetown: Georgetown Cupcake. Please just look at their website/menu and be jealous. We were wandering towards M Street to get coffee, and then, like a vision, this cupcake store appeared. I’d heard of it before, but I didn’t know that it was AROUND THE CORNER from our program’s headquarters. Which means I will probably go there every day. Which means next time you see me, I’ll have gained 200 pounds but I’ll be a lot happier.

Now everyone go eat a cupcake and get excited that it’s almost Friday.

[Posted by Mallory]

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