Category Archives: Uncategorized

study proves gamer stereotypes are true.

This just in from the Department of Things that are Unsurprising:  A new survey shows that the average U.S. gamer is overweight, 35 years old and depressed.

This study was conducted by the CDC in the Seattle-Tacoma area.  CDC’s Dr. James B. Weaver said,

“Health risk factors, specifically a higher BMI and a larger number of poor mental-health days, differentiated adult video-game players from non-gamers,” he said. “Video game players also reported lower extraversion [sic], consistent with research on adolescents that linked video-game playing to a sedentary lifestyle and overweight status.”

Image from vortexgames.com

Image from vortexgames.com

Does anyone else find this to be really disturbing?

Last weekend I was in Indianapolis for a wedding, which fell on the same weekend as Gen Con Indy– a gaming convention.  Walking around, our high heels and party dresses were a stark contrast to the sea of gamer costumes: elves, pirates, warrior princesses.  Not to go all Carrie from Sex and the City on you, but I couldn’t help but wonder–besides the costumes, what is it about gamers that really sets them apart from the rest of us?

While we non-gamers are surely not to blame for the natural chemical imbalances that lead to depression, what is our role in ostracizing gamers from mainstream society?

Perhaps we lack the imaginative spark they manage to hold on to, and we mock them for it.  That being said, there must be another outlet for imagination and creativity besides a video game.

We all understand what it’s like to feel comfortable in a community of like-minded people.  (My comfort zone is other political wonks and campaigners who, to some, may seem like weirdos. Unlike gamers, however, we tend to be painfully extroverted.  It takes a certain kind of person to actually like knocking on doors and talking to strangers.) And if the study had said the average gamers were mostly happy and healthy, I would say “live and let live” and then make a crack about how they probably still live in their parents’ basement.

But that isn’t the case.  We now have data pinpointing a distinct community of people who are depressed and unhealthy.  Now we just need to figure out what to do and how to reach them.

[Posted by Kathleen]

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this guy is no john dillinger.

MarkEarlWhite.jpgMark E. White was only trying to make his getaway after robbing the bank in Saginaw, Michigan.

According to the news story, Marky Mark had just gotten out of the slammer three weeks earlier when he decided to rob the Citizens Bank.  He was successful, and two blocks later tried to hitch a ride.  He flagged down a car… which happened to be an unmarked police car.  Needless to say, he was caught.

Now Mr. White, I am not a criminal — nor do I have any plans to ever become one– but I’m pretty sure that if I was, I’d make sure I arranged my transportation ahead of time.  Maybe that’s just me.

Ah, stories about dumb criminals.  It makes you feel just a little bit better about your Monday morning, no?

[Posted by Kathleen]

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former competitive eaters are fat. unbelievable!

WEINER WARS

This just in from the Department Of Things That Are Unsurprising:  Ex-competitive speed eaters report weight gain, chest pain and clogged arteries.  Oh my!

CNN has a gripping piece on former competitive speed eaters.

“Any way you look at it, it’s not healthy,” Dave “Coondog” O’Karma, a retired competitive eater, said of his former hobby. “You do it once in a while, and it’s fun. I don’t think loading your body with fat and salt is healthy.”

After 35 years of gobbling hamburger, oysters, eggs, corn on the cob and even bull testicles, O’Karma listened to his family and retired from the competition.

Maybe his family was just upset that he gobbled bull testicles.  Moving on!

According to the article, the effects of speed eating hadn’t been tested before.  If I had to venture as to why, I think because everyone would know that it’s bad for you.  That’s common sense.  But someone just HAD to do a test on it.

n 2007, four University of Pennsylvania School of Medicine doctors who specialize in gastroenterology and radiology conducted an experiment on the stomach activities of a competitive eater and an average eater. The average eater ate seven hot dogs before he felt sick. Champion speed eater Tim Janus ate 36 hot dogs in 10 minutes before doctors intervened.

The doctors had to intervene!

If you want to watch people clog their arteries just for funsies, Nathan’s Famous Fourth of July International Hot Dog Eating Contest airs tomorrow on ESPN.  Happy hot dog gobbling this weekend, folks!

[Posted by Kathleen]

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grayson wynne is boy vs. wild.

I'm a fake!

I'm a fake!

Apparently shows like Discovery Channel’s “Man vs. Wild” have some value. When 9-year-old Grayson Wynne was separated from his family during a camping trip in Utah’s Ashley National Forest, he remembered the things he had seen Bear Grylls do. (That man, by the way, is the biggest fake. Not that the New York Post is gospel, but this article is worth a read: click here. Fancy resorts, Bear?  Seriously?)

Grayson ripped his yellow rain jacket in to strips and tied them to trees to leave a trail and clues. He spent the night in a small shelter he made under a fallen tree, and the next morning followed a creek in hopes of finding a lake. He was found on Sunday after surviving on his own for 18 hours. I’m impressed, little G! This story of boy vs. wild also has a warm and fuzzy ending. The first thing he said to his dad was “Happy Father’s Day”. Awwww.

[Posted by Kathleen]

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peta is trying to hook phish.

Perhaps not quite the image PETA was thinking of?

Perhaps not quite the image PETA wanted to conjure up?

When I think of the band Phish, I think of fun music and happy crunchy granola hippies dancing around at their seventeenth consecutive show. Apparently, when PETA thinks of Phish they think of unpleasant things… ya know, like murder. Those PETA people are such downers.

I’ve mentioned this before on the blog. PETA wants to change the name of fish (the swimmy creatures, not the band) to sea kittens. That way, people won’t want to eat them if they think they’re eating a kitten of the sea. And when I said people, what I really meant was children. PETA is trying to make sure the little kiddies feel guilty when it’s fish sticks day at school. How admirable! PETA spokeswoman Ashley Byrne used this graphic similie:

“Hooking a fish through the mouth and dragging it out of the water is really the same as hooking a dog through the mouth and dragging him behind your car.”

Well, no. But I get what she’s trying to say. So now, PETA wants Phish, the band, to change its name to Sea Kitten. Not that Sea Kitten is a bad name for a band… if you’re a nautically themed chick rock band.

Phish_foodIf the band did change its name, the world would see some serious changes. Life changing ones. Obviously, I’m talking about Ben and Jerry’s ice cream. Phish Food would have to be changed to Sea Kitten Food, and that just sounds gross.

I’m sure some people will fall hook, line and sinker for this stupid publicity stunt. (Hook, line and sinker. Get it?! I’m funny!) But I just don’t take the bait. I think there are more important ways to attack animal cruelty, and PETA is wasting its time and energy. Why don’t they go after the sickos that actually kill animals with malice? Like that woman who skinned her Jack Russell Terrier last week to make a belt. Ugh. Now that makes me sick.

And what does the band have to say about all this? Nothing as of yet. But their Web site still says they are called Phish.

Thanks for the tip, Annie!

[Posted by Kathleen]

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kavya spells laodicean, wins spelling bee.

47187176Are you smarter than an 8th grade spelling whiz?  Could you spell the winning word?

Kavya Shivashankar, of Kansas, correctly spelled the world “laodicean” for the win last night in the Scripps Naitonal Spelling Bee.  You want to know something funny?  The top Google search right now is “definition laodicean”.  Well, here is what Dictionary.com has to say:

La⋅od⋅i⋅ce⋅an

–adjective

1. lukewarm or indifferent, esp. in religion, as were the early Christians of Laodicea.
–noun

2. a person who is lukewarm or indifferent, esp. in religion.
Origin:
1605–15; Laodice(a) + -an
Well DUH.

Here are some of the other final round words:  antonomasia, bouquiniste, oriflamme, guayabera, isagoge and sophrosyne, phoresy, menhir, maecenas, ophelimity, diacoele and reredos.

Never heard of those.

So Kavya gets $40,000 for being so awesome, and we all get to feel a little inept for the day.  Congratulations, Kavya Shivashankar!  The challenge now for everyone is spelling your last name!

[Posted by Kathleen]

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youtube clip of today: wearable towel.

The informercial madness continues.

WHAT IS SO DIFFICULT ABOUT USING A REGULAR TOWEL?!

Honestly, people.  How come everything needs to have arm holes now?  Our blankets, our towels.  What’s next?  Are we honestly that lazy?

And what would you say to someone if you saw them wearing a towel as a dress/toga in public?

[Posted by Kathleen]

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things i should have posted earlier.

Yeah yeah yeah.  I know.  I could have posted it this weekend (or yesterday), but nerd statistics show that nobody reads the blog on the weekend anyway, proving that you all use this while you are being paid by your unsuspecting employers. I love it!

SNL had a really good weekend.  Another JT/Andy Samberg song.  Oh girl, I love me some JT.   And Samberg.  RAWR.  If you like “Dick in a Box”, you’ll like this one too:

[clearspring_widget title=”SATURDAY NIGHT LIVE – Digital Short: Motherlover” wid=”4727a250e66f9723″ pid=”4a096ba17ff67505″ width=”384″ height=”283″ domain=”widgets.nbc.com”]

So that’s what your coworker is singing that you had no idea about.  A big SWTCTW you’re welcome!  What a beautiful ode to Mother’s Day.  Oddly enough though, I won’t be showing that to my mom.

That was funny, now let’s get political and funny.  In case you didn’t know, we have the greatest most bestest president in the entire world!  He is hilarious!  Here is his speech at the annual White House Correspondent’s Dinner:

The best joke in here is a little inside, I know!  It’s the one he makes about John Boehner (pronounced like BAINER, not BONER) being a person of color.  John Boehner, the House Minority leader, has skin that particular shade of orange that only comes from fake tanning.  See?

He’s even oranger in person, if oranger is a word.

Wanda Sykes was also REALLY funny, but I can’t do all the work for you, so you need to look that up yourself.

I’m off to stalk the news and find funny stuff to post!  You know you love me.  XOXO, i forgot to blog this weekend girl.

[Posted by Kathleen]

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jon, minus kate and 8, cheats.

jon-and-kate-gosselinSCROLL DOWN FOR STORY UPDATES

I just read some devastating, but kind of unsurprising, news.  Jon Gosselin of “Jon and Kate Plus 8” definitely cheated on Kate.  US Weekly has the whole story, which includes pictures.  The other woman is Deanna Hummel, a 23-year-old third grade teacher.  Her brother, Jason, lives with her and that’s why he can give all the juicy details.  And in case you’re wondering, he’s just trying to protect his sister, not get publicity for himself or somehow finagle money out of this.  Of course.

In fact, he’s trying to protect her so much that he takes away all of her privacy and any of her dignity with this gem of a quote:

A lot of the time, it was pretty, um, gross listening to her, you know, um — how do I say this? The walls are thin. Let’s just say that. I mean, no one wants to hear his sister having sex, let alone with a married dude who’s, like, almost twice her age and who has eight kids and a maybe-crazy wife. Ick. Nast.

Ick? Nast?  Gross.  I don’t really want to talk about the content of that quote, but I am obligated to point out that Jon isn’t “like, almost twice her age.”  He’s 32, and she’s 23.  He’s 14 years short of being twice her age.  Just sayin’.

This whole thing is a mess.

Two weeks ago, when pictures surfaced of Jon in a car with “the mystery woman” (it was Deanna) leaving a club, he made this statement.

“I went to Legends to speak to the owner.  A friend of mine wanted to check out my car, so I let her drive it to her car,” he says. “Yes, I have female friends — but that is all she is. I’m not going to end my friendships just because I’m on TV.”

Now Jon, that was stupid.  Kate is going to hit you extra hard now when you’re sitting in that big chair talking about your day and the lessons you learned.  Kate doesn’t like it when the kids lie, I doubt she’ll be very kind to you.

I wonder what TLC is going to do.  They said “no comment” on the story last time.   It’s all awful, and despite me thinking that Kate is really mean to Jon, there is no justification for his actions.  He doesn’t get a pass.  He has eight children under the age of seven.  What on earth was he thinking?  Did he think that nobody would recognize him?

I’m sad for the family, and most of all the children.  One of the things the Gosselin’s show was praised for is how “real” it is.  And we, their audience, really liked that.  Well, the scenes with the kids are real.  But the family dynamic is larger than just the day to day silliness of the kids.

Will this change the way you see the show?

Oh, and Aaden, if things get too tough at home, you can come live with me and Mallory.  We’ll raise you.  And get you a cuter pair of glasses.

UPDATED!

Here are the statements from Deanna Hummel and Jon Gosselin from People magazine:

“My brother is making this all up,” Hummel tells PEOPLE. “He has no credibility … I can’t even stomach the lies he’s saying about me.”  Hummel continues to deny any sort of romantic relationship with Gosselin, and the elementary school teacher admits that there’s been bad blood between her and her brother for a while now. “My brother is very shady,” says Hummel. “He has no job. He has a criminal background. He was charged for drug distribution. He’s on probation right now.”

“These allegations are false and just plain hurtful,” Gosselin says in a statement exclusively to PEOPLE. “As I adjust to the attention that comes from being in the public eye, I need to be more careful and aware of who I am associating with and where I am spending my time. But the bottom line is, I did not cheat on Kate.

And the plot thickens!

Here are the pictures.  Who do you believe?

gosselin_01

[Posted by Kathleen]

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the worst band EVER reunites. joy.

scott-stapp-looking-stupid-as-usual

Here is a quick piece of music news/a warning.  Remember Creed?  I’ll give you a moment while you cringe… are you okay?  Yeah, those guys.  Well, prepare for the second coming of the world’s worst faux-Christian rock band.  (Second coming.  Ha!  Get it?  Like Jesus?)

In an interview with Rolling Stone, Scott Stapp, the lead d-bag singer, calls the reunion a “a renewing and a rebirth”.  I would venture to say it’s more of “a remistake and a reterrible”.

There are going to be plenty of tour dates…if you really care.

The guys already have demos and are looking to all the money making producers to scrounge up a hit single for them.  Could we possibly see a Creed song featuring Timbaland?  Maybe?

But what about Scotty’s solo CD?!  He answers the most important question:

“It would be irresponsible for me to think about anything but Creed. This band is my first love and a first love that’s stood the test of time. It’s not hard to step away from any kind of personal agenda when you are totally fulfilled.”

A first love that stood the test of time… except when your band broke up for five years.  Now, call me crazy, but it seems like perhaps Mr. Stapp realized a reunion tour might be his only chance to make lots of dollars.  Maybe that’s what he means when he says totally fulfilled.

Some of you may wonder where all of this strong dislike for Creed comes from.  Well first of all, the music sucks.  But I think my real battle (if you couldn’t tell) is with Scott Stapp.  Rolling Stone forgets to mention a few things.  Creed broke up because Scott Stapp is a jerk.  And it was all downhill from there.  In 2006, he was arrested for public intoxication on the night of his wedding.  His 6 year old son was the best man.  Way to set a good example, Scott.  Then, he was arrested for domestic abuse in 2007.  Oh, and did you know he has a creepy sex tape with Kid Rock and a bunch of groupies on a bus?

KID ROCK.

Kid Rock and sex tape should not be in the same sentence.  Ever.

So there you have it.  You have been warned.  Now please excuse me, I’m going to go listen to some Taylor Swift.  THAT is music.

[Posted by Kathleen]

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