Category Archives: politics

jesse jackson: that’s not cool, dude.

So as some of you might have heard, Jesse Jackson messed up. On Fox News, of all places! He said something not so nice about my boy, Barack Obama. And like my mommy (and everyone else’s) says, if you don’t have anything nice to say, don’t say anything at all–especially when you there is a microphone attached to your body. He was getting ready to address B’s speeches to black people and said “I wanna cut his nuts out.” Ouch? Bad move, Jesse! I’m feeling very protective of my presumptive Democratic nominee (and his you know whats), and I might hold a grudge.

But who would say “I want to cut his nuts out”? Wouldn’t the phrase be “I want to cut his nuts OFF”? The good reverend is getting a little too graphic for my taste and mixing up his idioms. Plus, they only do stuff like that in Louisiana, under Gov. Bobby Jindal. Jindal signed a bill allowing chemical castration for sex offenders…but that’s a different story. And he’s on the short list for McCain’s veep spot. Ahem.

Anyway, of course Jackson apologized with some BS statement, and of course, Saint Barack was gracious and accepted the apology. What troubles me the most about this is the lack of unity that’s going on. Rev. Jesse Jackson and Sen. Barack Obama might not be on the same page about everything, but they are on most things. It’s like women who say they won’t vote for Barack because Hillary lost. So what, you’re going to vote for McCain now? The McCain that voted against ensuring equal pay rights to women? The McCain that voted against funding for victims of domestic violence? The McCain that is wrong about women’s health issues. And finally, the McCain that called his wife a cunt? Haha, I LOVE to bring that one up. Small differences (like in the case of jilted Hillary voters, a chromosome) aren’t enough of a reason to give up on the overall vision.

Right now, and I’m sad that Jesse Jackson can’t see this, the election is not about black and white. Not to sound corny, but it’s about all of America. Rev. Al Sharpton agrees with me. Barack “is running for president of all Americans, not just African-Americans,” he said. We “must be careful not to segregate Senator Obama and impose some litmus test that is unfair and unproductive.” Well put, sir.

I don’t think that B would ever talk down to black people, and I don’t think that he’s trying to “talk white” (as Ralph Nader accused him of. Shut up, Ralphie, you silly boy). It’s just not in his nature. He walks on water and saves the free world in his free time! Come on, people!

So I’m sorry Rev. Jackson! Oooh! Barack is FOR REAL. (My apologies, that was wretched but I couldn’t help it.)

Here is the video, I know you wanted to see it.

[Posted by Kathleen]

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sunday morning politicking is my favorite.

In my family, Sunday mornings are for discussing politics, watching CNN, Meet the Press (I MISS YOU, TIM) and other political talk shows. Actually, that’s every day. But Sunday mornings are particularly special. I am currently blogging from my bed and have no intentions of moving, so here is my commentary on a few things I found on the world wide web:

Those who know me know that I get serious birthday depression every year. I wonder how President Bush feels today, on his 62nd birthday. According to White House Press Secretary Dana Perino (oh girl, you are no C.J. Cregg), Bush “dutifully pretended to be surprised” when he was greeted with a chorus of “happy birthday” on Airforce One. I wonder if he “dutifully pretended to be surprised” when they found out there were no weapons of mass destruction, or any other one of the cover-ups that were proven to be deceptive…anyway, everyone deserves to feel free of all the havoc they cause the world on their birthday. So happy birthday to you, W!

The New York Times had a piece today about John McCain that I loved. In fact, the title was a six word memoir, and if I had no journalistic integrity, I would have just taken it for myself. But here it is:

McCain Battles a Nemesis, the Teleprompter.

Haha, how fantastic is that? Here are some of the highlights:

“He managed to limit the mechanical hand chops and weirdly timed smiles that can often punctuate his speeches.”

“I have set before the American people an energy plan, the Lex-eegton Project,” Mr. McCain said, drawing a quick breath and correcting himself. “The Lex-ing-ton Proj-ect,” he said slowly. “The Lexington Project,” he repeated. “Remember that name.”

In a town meeting in Cincinnati the next day, Mr. McCain would again slip up on the name of the Massachusetts town, where, he noted, “Americans asserted their independence once before.” He called it “the Lexiggdon Project” and twice tried to fix his error before flipping the name (“Project Lexington”) in subsequent references.

Oh, NYT, I love you so. Best of luck to you, Johnny. Should you be elected, which you will not be, what will you do during the State of the Union Address? We want Barack’s eloquence-which is exactly what we need as we try to reclaim respect from around the world.

Speaking of Barack, one thing that has been hitting the news circuit is Obama’s policy on religion and the White House. I am going to make no jokes about this because it’s no laughing matter-my boy B and I disagree on this. He wants to have an office of faith based initiatives, and my separation of church and state heathen pagan soul is screaming. Not because I think B will mess things up (he’s a saint), but just because I’m scared the people after him might. I’m all for faith based groups-they do amazing work for our country. But they’ve been doing a good job without having a major role in the executive branch thus far and can continue to do God’s work without one.

Slate.com, which I love, has a new fun function for all the political nerds out there- “Choose your own running mate“. I think I ended up with Evan Bayh. What are your thoughts?

Hmm…what else? Economy still sucks, gas prices are still incredibly high (my graduation money has been depleted. Wahhh.) and we are still at war. Not much to say about that.

Instead of ending on that depressing note, here is a picture to make you feel good:

They are perfect.

[Posted by Kathleen]

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and on this day in history…

Nice rhetoric, JFK

On this date 45 years ago, President John F. Kennedy famously declared “Ich bin ein Berliner” to a crowd of Germans in West Berlin. (And, from a nerdy rhetorical perspective, was able to successfully identify with his audience, thus enhancing his credibilty. Right, Dr. Achter?)

So yeah, bring that historical tidbit to your Thursday night happy hour. (Or, if your happy hour fell through, you can stay home and read the 1963 article here.)

[Posted by Mallory]

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cover shot: barack and rolling stone.

Well, folks, looks like our favorite hopeful candidate is gracing the cover of Rolling Stone this week (his second cover). And I must say, he’s looking good. Apparently, it’s a pretty big deal that the cover is headline-less. (The other famous wordless cover is that weird one of a naked John Lennon death-gripping Yoko with his thighs, which I’ve always found pretty creepy, even though a lot of people seem to like it.) So hey, congrats, Barack!

Rolling Stone doesn’t post the full article online, but I’ve been able to browse through some snippets of the interview with Obama, and I’m particularly excited to see that we Barack out to similar music: Bob Dylan, Bruce Springsteen, Elton John, the Rolling Stones. Not too shabby.

In the piece I watched about this cover on The Today Show (and yes, this morning I also suffered through the awkward Today Show wedding), some analysts thought that a cover like this makes it too easy for Obama to be pigeonholed. But the Rolling Stone has always been openly political (and liberal), and has featured Bill Clinton, Al Gore, Howard Dean, and John Kerry on its covers throughout the years (along with Richard Nixon and W, but for slightly different reasons), so I don’t think Obama is making some kind of radical statement that people need to get freaked out about.

What I find a little more…unusual…than the Stones cover is the fact that Donatella Versace came out with a fashion line dedicated to and inspired by Hopey. Here’s what blog Highbrid Nation had to say:

In a move that has shocked both the political and fashion arenas, Donatella Versaceannounced that her Spring/Summer 2009 collection, which she presented in Milan on Saturday is dedicated entirely to presidential hopeful Barack Obama.  Versace said he the line represents “a relaxed man who doesn’t need to flex muscles to show he has power.” Needless to say this has NEVER happened before…big pimpin’….

Bizarre, but pretty freakin’ cool, too. I don’t anticipate a McCain-inspired line of hair pieces, hearing aids, and Stepford wife arm accessories to be coming out anytime soon, so Obama’s got a leg up there. Take a look at the Donatella’s Baracouture:

Yellow mandals? Ouch.

[Posted by Mallory]

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kathleen: come august, bring your tent.

With the Democratic National Convention on its way to Denver in just under two months, there’s a lot of water cooler-type talk about the event. Across party lines, many people seem to be worried about the protest movement called “Re-create 68,” a movement that’s seeking to emulate the protests at the 1968 DNC in Chicago, where clashes between protesters and police officers often turned violent. The organization’s website states that it “was created for all the grassroots people who are tired of being sold out by the Democratic Party,” and, as commenter and group member Glenn Spagnuolo points out, the organization is committed to nonviolence. They’re against the two-party system in general, and for now are showing it by participating in local festivals and fairs, planning rallies, and trying to attract more supporters of their cause. About the name of the organization, the website explains:

Sometimes we need to look back to move forward. In 1968 there existed a spirit of change, the Paris Rebellion, Prague, Chicago, Vietnam, etc. People believed, around the world, that they were capable of taking over the institutions that controlled their lives. The smell of revolution was in the air. Over 1 million college students openly identified as revolutionist. People believed that through mass participation in the movement, it was possible to wrest control from the elite power-holders. They were not willing to accept the loss of their human and civil rights.

They are trying to re-inspire a revolutionary attitude, which, based on what happened in 1968, understandably makes people a little nervous. Which is why, perhaps, the city is so far being so accommodating to another protest group, Tent State University. For now, the two protest groups are connected, but Denver City Councilwoman Carla Madison encouraged Tent State to break off from R-68 to make things a little easier on them. In a Rocky Mountain New article on the topic, Madison said that she views R-68 as a “little more anarchistic.” (Here’s the online version of the article, but please note that the online article and the hard copy of the article that I’m referencing are not exactly the same.)

Tent State describes itself as “a positive, youth-led initiative to fund education instead of war.” According to the RMN article, the group hopes to bring up to 50,000 people to Denver’s City Park (pictured below, and yes, I do realize how lucky I am) from August 24-28 and provide the experience of a “real democracy,” complete with protests and classes teaching nonviolent and anti-war tactics. So far, the city has issued Tent State a permit for 20,000 people, and this morning on the radio I heard a sound byte from Mayor John Hickenlooper in which he expressed support for the group, and expected them to be non-disruptive, partly because they are in support of Obama.

Denver\'s City Park, the proposed site of Tent State University\'s demonstration (and yes, I do realize how lucky I am)

So far, the one major kink in the plans deals with the actual camping permit. Naturally, it’s a lot easier to provide a place for 20,000 people to hang out during the day than to provide a place for the same number of people to sleep, eat, and shower. But as Adam Jung, the chief Tent State organizer, points out, “If we have to figure out a way to remove all of these people at 10 or 11 at night, it becomes very problematic…that’s what happened in Chicago.”

Tent State and the city of Denver are still in discussion, but for now, I think all of this is great. It’s impressive that the city is being so willing to work with the organization, and it could set a standard for future successful nonviolent protests. I’ll be starting grad school in DC during the week of the convention, but I’ll be crossing my fingers and keeping an eye on the action along with everyone else. Good luck, Tent Sate.

[Posted by Mallory]

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dead guy over you? that sucks.

So a village in Romania re-elected their dead mayor over a new guy. By a landslide of 23 decisive votes. Really not much to say about that, except that the loser must feel like the friggin’ village idiot.

“I know he died, but I don’t want change,” one astute voter said. You and me both, buddy. People are calling for a re-vote with a new (hopefully conscious and, at the very least, breathing) candidate. Watch out for the hanging chads, people! We all know what happened here in America! For all you political nerds out there, don’t lose track of this race, it’s shaping up to be a good one.

[Posted by Kathleen]

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john mccain is no james mcavoy.

As a full time blogger (read: unemployed and uninsured, so going out into the real world poses a threat to my health. I could get hurt!), it is my responsibility to creep around the internet at 4 a.m. looking for inspiration.

I stumbled across a video about silly, ornery, old John McCain. Apparently, he called his wife a c-c-c-c-c-cunt. I have trouble even typing it. Did Cindy McCain do something so terrible? Nope. She jokingly told him that he was balding. Um, hello, J? When you’re 300 years old, you’re bound to bald. Here is what he said to her:

“At least I don’t plaster on the makeup like a trollop, you cunt.”

Wowie! So we know how he really feels. John and Cindy 4eva! I don’t particularly like Cindy McCain, but I would never call her that. I would call her a Stepford Wife, recipe-stealing, identity-stealing recovering drug addict, home-wrecking other woman, but never a cunt. That is NEVER okay. His excuse? He was tired. Um, fine. But as Wonkette pointed out, he’s going to be tired a lot if he becomes president.

The only time I have ever not been offended at all by the word was with James McAvoy and the infamous typewriter scene in Atonement. (Which incidentally, led to the infamous library scene. Rawr!) And even then, as he was typing, my mind kept wondering…Is he really going to type that? Looks like it, but they wouldn’t…oh no! OH MY GOD. HE DID! And for the record-James McAvoy, you can call me anything you’d like.

But I digress.

Barack gets called out for calling a reporter “sweetie”, which, he admits, is a bad habit. At least it’s a casual term of endearment. But nobody calls McCain out for being a complete cotton-headed-ninny-muggins (the worst insult among Santa’s elves, duh) to his wife. Why? I think this video does a really good job at explaining it:

What are your thoughts, you cunts? Did I say that? It’s late, I must be tired.

[Posted by Kathleen]

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bikes, boobs and a hemp g-string.

Oregonian (Oregonite? Oregonese?) woman Jen Moss is pissed because people just don’t understand her need to bicycle around topless and are prohibiting her from riding in the Fourth of July parade. According to the AP, Moss is known for riding her bike “free and independent of all clothing but a hemp G-string”. In fact, she’s known as “The Naked Lady”.

I get the naked part (let the girls get some air), but the hemp G-string sounds questionable at best. You know, back in the day aka 8th grade, I was quite good at making hemp necklaces with cool beads and whatnot. I gave them as gifts to my friends. Maybe now since our tastes have matured, I can make them all hemp G-strings with cute little beads! AHHH! But back to business.

The Ashland Chamber of Commerce is in a battle right now over this. In Moss’ application she said she wants to lead a group of rollerbladers in her hemp booty floss, “blowing a conch shell.” Blowing what wearing what? Errr… Whatev, she sounds like an inspirational leader (those rollerbladers are bound to follow her, along with every creepy man within 50 miles) and America is all about leadership!

Clearly she is a great patriot and loves America. Come on people, it’s the Fourth of July. It’s not like your children haven’t seen boobs before. Let Jen parade!

[Posted by Kathleen]

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john mccain, you silly old man.

McCain

So that I actually feel informed on the seemingly overwhelming world of politics, I have a couple of daily briefings emailed to me. One of these is MSNBC’s First Read. In their afternoon email today, a particular issue caught my eye. McCain (who, according to the above photo, is also an irritating fist-pumper) had scheduled a fundraiser at the home of Texas oil man Clayton Williams, the man who in 1990 said about rape, “It’s like the weather, if it’s inevitable, relax and enjoy it.” Um, yeah. Well even though this was a HUGE issue back in 1990, made national news, and essentially killed Williams’ campaign for governor of Texas, McCain claims that he and his staffers didn’t know about the controversial comment. (More on that here; I’m not the expert, these guys are.) Also, according to MSNBC, “the word ‘rape’ is in the title of the third link that comes up in a ‘Clayton Williams’ Google search.” In McCain’s defense, he’s like 300 years old and is probably still figuring out how to send an email.

[Posted by Mallory]

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hey al, it’s about friggin’ time.

To celebrate Al Gore’s official endorsement of Barack, I will use the internet (his invention) for the rest of my life.

This man is truly the superstar of the Democratic Party. Think about it, before the big O, he was the last solid candidate the Democrats put up. He could have disappeared after his loss…okay, so he put on some weight and grew a beard…but instead he went on to write books, save the world and win an Oscar and a Nobel. Snaps to you, Al!

PS- Al Gore inventing the internet jokes will never get old.

[Posted by Kathleen]

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