Why oh why is this song not played on the radio?
“He taught me how to praise my God and still play rock and roll”. PRICELESS. Umm…rock and roll? Rock on, Sonseed.
[Posted by Kathleen]
Category Archives: humor
i could yearbook myself all day.
I have found probably the most entertaining Web site since Cake Wrecks. Seriously. www.yearbookyourself.com is so funny, that you pass it on to everyone you know. And I am passing this internet gem on to you.
Enjoy.
Looking fiiiiiiiine in 1964.
Super cute in 1976.
Ummm…1986…I look like…NOOOOOOO.
And as if my self confidence needed one more final blow, here I am, in 1996.
Saucy.
Send your best yearbook pictures to sixwordstochangetheworld@gmail.com.
[Posted by Kathleen]
Filed under definitely not politics, humor, pop culture, random, Uncategorized
law and order makes us fat.
According to a recent study, I could place the blame on Law and Order and all 17 of its spin-offs for the fact that I eat a lot. I’m not kidding. Law and Order, and other crime shows, apparently makes us eat a lot. I am an avid Law and Order fan–uh oh.
In the study, titled “The Sweet Escape,” researchers conducted four experiments revealing that “consumers who have been recently reminded of their own impending mortality” spend more on groceries — and actually eat more of those groceries.
Oooh, clever title. Anyway, Law and Order and others are the catalysts for reminding us of our own impending mortality? What? Whatev.
“We found that when people think about the fact that they’re going to die someday — not now, but someday — they want to consume more of everything,” says Naomi Mandel, co-author of the study and an associate professor of marketing at Arizona State University. “We find this with snacks and drinks but also all kinds of different foods: frozen foods, meats, vegetables, everything.”
And they connect this to Law and Order. I can’t believe they spent money on this study. I have, in my opinion, a better theory to explain the connection between snacking and Law and Order. None of this “impending death” mumbo jumbo.
Let’s look back to the experiments of scientist Ivan Pavlov. He is known for his work with dogs, making them salivate at the sound of a bell. Basically, it has to do with mental association. He would ring a bell and give the dogs food. Eventually, they would salivate at the sound of the bell with or without food present.
People like to snack when watching TV, right? So swap out a bell for the signature Law and Order gavel DunDun noise and take away the food…voila! We have been trained liked Pavlov’s dogs to feel hungry while watching Law and Order. And being that Law and Order is on 22 out of the 24 hours in a day, this training does not take long to do. Really, all it takes is one week of being sick and watching TV all day every day, or just a few weeks of watching one or two episodes a night.
That, my friends, is why we eat when we watch Law and Order. That is why Law and Order makes us fat.
Just for fun, here is Sesame Street’s parody of Law and Order: SVU, Law and Order: Special Letters Unit.
Oh, and just because The Office is the BEST SHOW EVER and Jim is dreamy, dreamy, oh so steamy and smart, here is his Pavlov’s dogs trick on Dwight:
[Posted by Kathleen]
Filed under animals, definitely not politics, food, humor, news, pop culture, random, TV, Uncategorized, YouTube
i’d choose barbie over sarah palin.
Oh wooohoooo. Now you can buy a Superhero Sarah Palin doll. Umm, that’s great. Since this election is no longer about issues and rather that Palin is a Vagina-American and is hot in the Tina Fey way, let’s be superficial for a minute. Who wants a supposedly feminine doll with G.I. Joe man thighs? Come on guys, Barbie’s got better legs for sure.
See?
Intimidated by the Thunder Thighs Palin doll? (Yeah, me too) Try this one–naughty school girl Sarah Palin.
Yet again, I’d choose Barbie. Or better yet, the one responsible for bringing back the naughty school girl image–the one and only, Britney Spears doll.
Yup, she’s better than Palin too.
Here is the final Sarah Palin doll the company, http://www.herobulder.com, offers. Vice Presidential Sarah Palin:
Well, Barbie one-upped Sarah Palin in two ways here. First, Barbie is running for Prez and second, Barbie looks FABULOUS.
That was fun, but let’s take it back to the issues. I bet Barbie would stand up for the rights of women more than Palin. I bet Barbie would support birth control and a woman’s privacy, I bet Barbie wouldn’t make women pay for their own rape kits, I bet Barbie wouldn’t make Skipper have the baby even if she was raped, I bet Barbie wouldn’t be on a ticket with Ken if he didn’t support equal pay for women…okay…you get my point.
Really, I’d take Barbie over Sarah Palin.
Oh, and one more thing. These dolls are on sale.
[Posted by Kathleen]
Filed under humor, politics, pop culture, random, Uncategorized
pigs fly and fat ladies sing.
Breathe deep, friends. I have some shocking news. The unthinkable has happened.
The 99 Cents Only Store, hailed by everyone themselves as “the oldest single-price point retail chain in the United States” (lots of competition for that title, I’m sure) is now making a mockery out of its name. And by a mockery, I mean that prices are going up and not all items in the store will be 99 cents. WHAT? EXCUSE ME? This is, for sure, a tragedy. What, or rather who, is to blame? Let’s examine the usual suspects… The bad economy? George Bush? Global warming? Nope.
Shoplifters.
So let me get this straight. You shop at a 99 Cents Only Store because you are cheap. But because the cheapest of the cheap are stealing from the store for the cheap, those of us who are just cheap (but still have integrity) must suffer? Eek! My brain hurts.
What are they going to do now? Become ‘The Store Formerly Known As The 99 Cents Only Store’? That maketing strategy worked for Prince. Having every item in the store under a dollar is their best marketing strategy. And as annoying (and impractical) as pennies are, there is a certain gratification when you get change back at a 99 cents store.
The world will never be the same. Or you could just go to Dollar Tree.
PS- Like the beautiful graphic I created to go along with this post? I worked on it for hours…
[Posted by Kathleen]
Filed under humor, money, news, pop culture, random, Uncategorized
delightfully hypocritical video for your weekend.
Courtesy of our AC, our New England correspondent, please check out this wonderful clip from The Daily Show. Jon Stewart 2016!
[Posted by Mallory]
just six words and a picture.
Legs crossed, hands folded, titled heads.
or
Two Stepfords and a moose-eating governor.
or
OMG, Cindy McCain has orange legs.
[Posted by Kathleen]
Filed under humor, politics, pop culture, six word memoirs
hello labor day, goodbye white pants.
Happy Labor Day, ya’ll! I hope you’re enjoying the three day weekend! As I was contemplating how I DO NOT have today off, I realized that I had no clue as to the real meaning and history of Labor Day (Wiki that) other than it’s the end of summer (wahhhh) and I can’t wear white until Memorial Day. Ugh. This is especially distressing to me because I have a killer pair of white pants that I didn’t get to show off this summer. Well, I tried to show them off. What happened to me was very traumatic. No, I didn’t spill anything on them. It’s even worse.
I realized that time was running out, so I brought said pants to Denver, for the D amazing NC. Saving the best for last, I waited until Thursday to wear them. So I woke up a little late on Thursday and got dressed. White pants, classy black top. I felt good. Like vintage J-Lo. My mother walks into the hotel room. She’s wearing white pants and a classy black top. A wave of panic hit me harder than when the Spice Girls broke up. It’s okay to admire your mother–it is not okay to dress like your mother. At least not when you’re 22! Am I becoming my mother?! I thought I had more time before the transformation took place! Haha. In vain she tried to tell me it would be alright, that nobody would notice. But I could already feel the judgmental eyes on me as I walked next to her on the street. I’d even mock me. I quickly changed into an inferior outfit, and the white pants were thrust back into my suitcase, untouched by the summer sun.
Yup, that’s it. I have been trying to think of some way to turn my white pants story into an allegory of sorts, but I’m afraid it’s too shallow for that. There is, perhaps, some message here. I might have better off if I had just listened to my mother and worn the white pants. Or more likely, it didn’t matter at all. 🙂 Yes, I just emoticoned. What of it?
While today is not its official end, I hope that you all had a lovely summer. It went by so fast, didn’t it?
[Posted by Kathleen]
Filed under family, fashion, humor, pop culture, random
kids will google the weirdest things!
One of the nerdier aspects of having a blog is that you can see which search terms people used to stumble across it. These, as you can imagine, are often hysterical and probably a little too entertaining. Here are a few from the past couple of days with my comments and best guess as to what it pulled up next to it. Please note the spelling and grammar.
“tru blood cellular specialist” Tru without the e? Gangsta. Click here.
“sucking katy perry’s boobies” I mean really, who hasn’t Googled this? Click here.
“silly old man” This can only mean one thing. John McCain. Click here, here, here, here or here.
“what does the olypic maskots look like” Answer: Pokemon. And based on the spelling, I’m guess the user is familiar with Pokemon. Click here.
“kevin bacon speedos” Rawr. Wouldn’t it be great if he had his own line of Speedos? Click here.
“super dance youtube sexxy” Uhhh… click here?
Oh, the things people will Google. I hope we don’t disappoint.
Still waiting on that Obama VP decision. Last minute guesses? I’m leaning towards Rep. Chet Edwards or Joe Biden… text me already, B!
[Posted by Kathleen]
john mccain loses the numbers game.
Oh Johnny. It was only a simple question. Politico reporters Jonathan Martin and Mike Allen asked how many houses you have. McCain’s answer is priceless.
“I think — I’ll have my staff get to you. It’s condominiums where — I’ll have them get to you.”
What was that, buddy? You don’t know how many houses you and Cindy own? Well that can’t be good. Now I’m not good at math, but I’m pretty sure I can answer that question for myself. (Um, zero. Oh the joys of living in your parents’ house.)
Okay, so he doesn’t know how many houses he has, but here are some other basic addition questions that I hope John can answer without needing his staff to bail him out:
- How old are you?
- How many children do you have?
- How many days are in a week?
- How many states are in the union?
Hopefully those are elementary, my dear Watson.
So what did B have to say about the whole thing?
“If you don’t know how many houses you have, then it’s not surprising that you might think the economy is fundamentally strong.”
Zing! Well put. Most of us, John, can count our houses on one hand. Well, one finger. Your choice which finger you use when counting.
Politico did some digging around (apparently the staff didn’t get to them on that?) and discovered the number is at least eight. Johnny obviously wouldn’t be able to handle adding one more (say, the White House). So let’s do Senator John McCain a huuuuuge favor and make sure we don’t rock the boat by changing the number from at least eight to at least nine. It’s the kind thing to do.
And on a sidenote: Barack, I’ve been clinging to my cell phone for dear life waiting for that text message. Please, just let me know!
Update: WashPo does a McCain house(s) tour. Check it out. It’s like MTV Cribs.
[Posted by Kathleen]
Filed under celebrities, humor, news, politics
six words to change the world. 