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Category Archives: TV
tina fey is palin on snl!
The woman who made wearing glasses sexy is back. Tina Fey, I love you. And now she is back on SNL as highly under-qualified Alaska Governor Sarah Palin–and she’s great at it. Even the obnoxious accent is right. Enjoy.
Vodpod videos no longer available.[Posted by Kathleen]
Filed under celebrities, humor, politics, pop culture, random, TV, Uncategorized, YouTube
law and order makes us fat.
According to a recent study, I could place the blame on Law and Order and all 17 of its spin-offs for the fact that I eat a lot. I’m not kidding. Law and Order, and other crime shows, apparently makes us eat a lot. I am an avid Law and Order fan–uh oh.
In the study, titled “The Sweet Escape,” researchers conducted four experiments revealing that “consumers who have been recently reminded of their own impending mortality” spend more on groceries — and actually eat more of those groceries.
Oooh, clever title. Anyway, Law and Order and others are the catalysts for reminding us of our own impending mortality? What? Whatev.
“We found that when people think about the fact that they’re going to die someday — not now, but someday — they want to consume more of everything,” says Naomi Mandel, co-author of the study and an associate professor of marketing at Arizona State University. “We find this with snacks and drinks but also all kinds of different foods: frozen foods, meats, vegetables, everything.”
And they connect this to Law and Order. I can’t believe they spent money on this study. I have, in my opinion, a better theory to explain the connection between snacking and Law and Order. None of this “impending death” mumbo jumbo.
Let’s look back to the experiments of scientist Ivan Pavlov. He is known for his work with dogs, making them salivate at the sound of a bell. Basically, it has to do with mental association. He would ring a bell and give the dogs food. Eventually, they would salivate at the sound of the bell with or without food present.
People like to snack when watching TV, right? So swap out a bell for the signature Law and Order gavel DunDun noise and take away the food…voila! We have been trained liked Pavlov’s dogs to feel hungry while watching Law and Order. And being that Law and Order is on 22 out of the 24 hours in a day, this training does not take long to do. Really, all it takes is one week of being sick and watching TV all day every day, or just a few weeks of watching one or two episodes a night.
That, my friends, is why we eat when we watch Law and Order. That is why Law and Order makes us fat.
Just for fun, here is Sesame Street’s parody of Law and Order: SVU, Law and Order: Special Letters Unit.
Oh, and just because The Office is the BEST SHOW EVER and Jim is dreamy, dreamy, oh so steamy and smart, here is his Pavlov’s dogs trick on Dwight:
[Posted by Kathleen]
Filed under animals, definitely not politics, food, humor, news, pop culture, random, TV, Uncategorized, YouTube
delightfully hypocritical video for your weekend.
Courtesy of our AC, our New England correspondent, please check out this wonderful clip from The Daily Show. Jon Stewart 2016!
[Posted by Mallory]
liveblogging john “walnuts” mccain’s acceptance speech.
Since Kathleen is off doing actually important things, you’re stuck with me for liveblogging. You can expect me to have an extremely unsophisticated analysis. Don’t say I didn’t warn you.
10:00 — Football is still on. NBC doesn’t care about the Republicans.
10:01 — Ah, there we go. Shot of Palin and Cindy. They’re both wearing shiny suits. Today I had several anxiety attacks thinking about what would happen if John McCain was elected president and then died.
10:05 — Here we go with the video. Ha ha he’s a momma’s boy.
10:06 — Everyone is John McCain’s family was in a war. Had you heard that McCain fought in Vietnam? And he almost died? But he was DESTINED TO BE PRESIDENT. Oh also, he was tortured.
10:07 — Okay, sure, John McCain was once sort of attractive. He spent years in HELL…nice dramatic rhetoric, there.
10:09 — Cindy really does look like an alien. Ha, he’s not in this to support any political party…then why didn’t he act like a real maverick and pick Lieberman?
10:10 — Pictures of babies and old women. He has seven children? I did not know that. Oh wait, I do remember that blonde girl who writes the terrible blog.
10:11 — “The stars are aligned…”? Really? He’s stealing Barry’s “change” word.
10:11 — Wait, did they MENTION that McCain was tortured? In Vietnam? He lived in a BOX, PEOPLE. Ha ha, box. He will keep other people from enduring that box. Sexist!
10:13 — Here he comes. They set aside seven minutes for applause. Hmm. He is wearing a gold tie, which means he hates America.
10:14 — It’s sort of sad that Barry filled Invesco and what ever small St. Paul place this speech is in isn’t even full.
10:14 — Weird, someone in the crowd has a disposable camera.
10:15 — Ha, three minutes and he’s already talking. GREEN SCREEN ALERT. Or wait, is that a lawn?
10:16 — “USA! USA! USA!”
10:16 — Surprise surprise, he accepts the nomination.
10:16 — Reference to Bush, but he quickly ties it to 9/11. Good save, Johnny.
10:17 — His signs so aren’t as cool as Barry’s.
10:18 — “I’m indebted to my robot wife Cindy, whom I selected once my other wife got crippled.”
10:18 — Cindy ALMOST looks like she might cry. She has really thin lips.
10:19 — McCain’s mom is sort of adorable. I like her big blue earrings.
10:21 — Says some nice things about Barry. Can they PLEASE stop chanting USA?
10:22 — McCain holds his shoulders awkwardly as he promises to win the election.
10:23 — AH A CRAZY WOMAN JUST RUSHED THE STAGE! No one knows what to do! This is amazing! Wait is that a Code Pinker? McCain calms them down with his creepy laugh. I think there are two crazy women. One in a suit, one in a weird pink satin shirt with writing on it. Hmm.
10:24 — He seems to be annoyed that they keep chanting “USA.” He could use some Crest White Strips. They’re only like $17 now.
10:25 — Everyone loves Sarah Palin. Did he just pronounce her name wrong?
10:25 — “I want to thank everyone in American for ignoring Sarah’s lack of experience and instead focusing on the fact that she’s sort of hot.”
10:26 — Shot of the Palin kids. Ah, there’s Bristol. Where’s hot hot baby daddy Levi?
10:27 — He can’t wait to introduce Palin to Washington because SHE’S BASICALLY NEVER BEEN THERE BEFORE.
10:27 — “Change is coming.” Seriously dude, that’s basically plagarism.
10:29 — “Heh heh. Did I mention I’ve been called a maverick?” Ha, someone’s McCain-Palin sign is upside-down.
10:31 — I still get email updates about concerts coming to Denver, and I get really angry when there are good people coming when I’m not there. Anyone want to fly me out to Denver on October 16 to see Conor Oberst?
10:32 — THE Georgetown bar is “hoppin,” according to my roommate. I wish I was liveblogging this from a bar.
10:33 — Okay, so he talked about Iraq for a while, but so far this speech seems kind of fluffy.
10:33 — Ooh here come the personal sob stories. Aw, a dad is crying.
10:34 — McCain wears a bracelet of a young man who died in Iraq. The kid’s parents look so sad.
10:36 — He promises to get back to basics. Shot of a kid with a phallic elephant hat on his head.
10:36 — American Dream rhetoric. “We’re all God’s children, and we’re all Americans.”
10:37 — Rattles off the romantic reasons that people like my dad are Republicans. Too bad that’s quite far from reality.
10:38 — He’ll give us a government that doesn’t make our choices for us, but rather lets us make more choices for ourselves. They’re booing Obama. WATCH IT PEOPLE WE LOVE BARRY.
10:39 — I wonder who all those people in the straw hats are.
10:41 — Do I want to go watch this speech at my roommate’s boyfriend’s house and eat ice cream? Hmmm.
10:42 — “Something related to education is the civil rights movement of this century.” Interesting analogy. I might have said that the GLBT movement is the most important civil rights issue right now. Not that education’s not important, but you know…
10:44 — People are yawning. I am too.
10:45 — Did Palin get new glasses?
10:45 — “We will drill off-shore and we will drill NOW!” Someone is holding up an “Environmentalists for McCain” sign. Really? Did they notice that Palin doesn’t believe humans are responsible for global warming?
10:46 — Stop making fun of Barry; we all know off-shore drilling isn’t a long-term option.
10:47 — “We must see the threats to peace and liberty in our time clearly.” True, let’s do that.
10:48 — “Iran is evil. So is Russia.” But I don’t understand…I have a REALLY adorable teacher from Iran. He wears bow ties.
10:49 — “I’m not afraid; I’m prepared. I know how the military works…yada yada.”
10:50 — My roommate just left. She took the ice cream. Now I’m bored and lonely again with no one but McCain to keep me company.
10:51 — Okay, he spoke sort of eloquently there about war and peace and keeping us safe.
10:52 — I don’t think I’m very good at liveblogging. I’m exceptionally bored and don’t have anything insightful to say. I wish I had something delicious to snack on. Let’s see what Wonkette just liveblogged: “He’s like, I will not send Young People To Die for no good reason. And yet… just… and yet.” Dear Wonkette, I love you.
10:53 — “I WAS IN A WAR, REMEMBER? THAT BLACK GUY WASN’T.”
10:54 — Girl with yellow eyeshadow cries.
10:55 — Ooh valuable life lesson time. Oh, shocker, it’s about how he was in the war. “Vietnam Vietnam…torture torture torture…I was a maverick…I was shot down…and remember, I was tortured!!!” Two other soldiers he was with took care of him and saved his life. That does make me feel sort of warm and fuzzy inside.
11:02 — “We’ve gotta fight for our right to party.” Okay he didn’t really say that. Now he’s talking like a robot through the cheers of the crowd. Ha, they, they worked in a shot of a guy wearing a yarmulke and a black woman right at the end. Republicans are so diverse!
11:05 — Phew, it’s over. What is that music at the end? Oh, it’s really bad, tacky country music, that’s what.
11:07 — The balloons just dropped, awkwardly late. What is this, THE PROM?! (Zing!)
Okay I’m finished with this. Hopefully Kathleen will be back tomorrow with some legitimate commentary.
[Posted by Mallory]
omfg, gossip girl is back. xoxo.
So I quasi-live blogged the show with the hottest cast EVER, quasi-not.
Quick thoughts:
Croquet, pastels and cocktails. It’s GG. And it’s on crack–and by crack I mean the Hamptons. Thirty seconds in and these crazy kids are already getting it on! God I missed this show. Rawr. WHY WAS I NOT THAT HOT AT 16? Or 17. Or 18. Or 19…this is getting depressing. Whatever.
Oooh Dunkin’ Donuts product placement on Rufus’ tour bus. My New England trained eye could spot a DD logo anywhere.
Drama with Blair and “Chuck Basstard” about a pin. What is this? 1950? LAME.
Speaking of Chuck. I think they’ve taken this “I’m Chuck Bass” thing a little too far. Taking good characters from the first time around and putting them on steroids for all subsequent appearances is a common mistake. I like to call it the Stifler Syndrome. In the first American Pie movie, Stifler was absurd yet oddly believable. And kind of funny. I mean, he does get peed on. With each AP movie, (AP 2, American Wedding) he became a caricature of himself and utterly obnoxious. He is practically the star of American Wedding. Teevee God (aka script writers and producers) help us. I WANT OLD CHUCK BACK.
Let’s take a second to acknowledge Serena’s hair at the White Party. She looked like a goddess, for sure. But the hair was so over the top. It looked like golden snakes wound in with the Jessica Simpson and Ken Paves lovechild hair extensions. Her hair = a hot tranny mess. Despite having hair of the Medusa persuasion, Blake Lively is stunning and I want to be her. (Blake and Penn–never ever ever ever break up. Ya’ll are the new Seth and Summer/Adam and Rachel. Don’t fail us like they did.)
I have a friend who believes Blair Waldorf is his soulmate. Best of luck to you, friend, because a) she’s not real and b) this bitch is back in full force. (Is it just me or did she look like she got into a nasty brawl with a spray tan booth? Ummm Blair it was the White Party, not the Orange and White party.) And dating a British lord who pretended to be an American that went to Princeton so that people liked him for his pretentious, rich American elitist self and not his pretentious, rich British elitist self? My mind is blown. First of all, this makes me yearn for the days when Prince William was still a dreamboat (sigh). But really, GG? You’re going to give us all false hopes that this tomfoolery actually happens? And that a British Lord wants me to like him for him and not just his title? Disney already ruined me. This might break me.
As Kristen Bell’s voice familiarly closed the episode with “You know you love me. XOXO, Gossip Girl”, I have to say, I don’t think I did love this Gossip Girl. The scripts were never good, but this was dreadful. I love me some bad teevee shows and my expectations are wayyyyyy lower than they should be, but I at least expect the dialogue to be tolerable at best.
But the clothes were amazing. And I’ll still watch next week. Mission accomplished.
On another note, I am obsessed with the song played in the opening scene. It is my new favorite summer/end of summer (wahhhhhhh) song and I am embarrassed. I am embarrassed because one half of the band, Shwayze, is Mischa Barton’s ex-bf. Remember Cisco Adler? Yup. Now he can be known for something other than looking like the younger brother of Weird Al and being the former lovah of the worst character on the OC and a Keds spokeswoman. Basically this song is the 2008 version of LFO’s “Summer Girls”. Stop judging me, jerks.
You know you love me. XOXO, Kathleen.
[Posted by Kathleen]
Filed under blogging, celebrities, crushes, fashion, pop culture, random, sex, TV, Uncategorized, YouTube
samantha bee stings governor sarah palin.
As much as I want to, I can’t really hate Sarah Palin–oh don’t get me wrong–this has nothing to do with the bonds of sisterhood. I absolutely ABHOR her positions on, well, everything. And her early 90s mall girl bangs. But she is so much fun to write about and make fun of that I can’t help but be slightly appreciative of her very existence. And I’m not alone. It’s like John McCain took his happy pills and threw us all a softball. And leave it up to All-Star Jon Stewart to hit it out of the park. Jon Stewart, you are my hero.
So watch this clip with Jon and Samantha Bee, a self described “Vagina-American” (HAHA!), as she oh-so-sarcastically talks about why she’ll vote for McCain. You will for sure pick up some new anatomical terminology as well. (I’m talking about lady parts. Teehee.)
Vodpod videos no longer available.
Huzzah!
And here is some more Daily Show goodness, brought to my attention by Alicia, our South Korea correspondent. What a warm/appropriate welcome for the RNCers!
PS- I promise I’ll start writing about non-political stuff (aka NOT Sarah Palin) again…
[Posted by Kathleen]
Filed under celebrities, crushes, news, politics, pop culture, random, TV, Uncategorized, YouTube
david duchovny’s life imitates his art.
Your SWTCTW bloggers (and beloved friends) love the show ‘Californication’. For those of you who do not know the show, it’s basically Hank Moody (David Duchovny’s character) having sex with anything that walks. That sounds crass, but it’s a really witty, well-written show that actually has a plot. As you can imagine, I’ve been a leeeeeeeeetle preoccupied singing ‘Kumbaya’ with my fellow Democrats and have been neglecting all other news. So I was surprised/unsurprised to read that Duchovny is going into rehab for a sex addiction. Uh oh. That can’t be good. Here is D’s statement to People Magazine:
“I have voluntarily entered a facility for the treatment of sex addiction. I ask for respect and privacy for my wife and children as we deal with this situation as a family.”
He’s married to Téa Leoni. Shame on you for being a dirty boy, David. And it’s sad that life imitates art. But here’s the difference: Hank would nevah evah go to rehab for a sex addiction to try and get better.
[Posted by Kathleen]
Filed under celebrities, definitely not politics, news, pop culture, random, sex, TV
cry face: the marsh 10 edition.
Because I am not going back to the familiar undergraduate college that I know and love, and am instead starting classes as the awkward grad student at a new college, I’m feeling a little nostalgic. So I’ll dedicate this Hump Day Cry Face to one of my old roommates, who is a phenomenal Cry Facer and loves polar bears, ABC Family, flashlight tag, and clothes. Steph, consider this a test of whether you read the blog:
Happy almost Thursday, everyone!
[Posted by Mallory]
Filed under cry face, post-college depression, TV
huge political girl boner for hillary.
So I considered live-blogging Hillary’s speech but then I got nervous because Kathleen is way smarter than me when it comes to politics. Now I wish I had live-blogged it. From a nerdy rhetoric student’s point of view, and a weepy patriot’s point of view, and the point of view of some one who thinks Barack Obama looks damn good in a suit, that was a GOOD speech.
She got the weepy stories in; she did some great McCain bashing; and she did an excellent job hammering home the message of “HEY CRAZY LADIES! Voting for McCain or voting for no one is NOT the way to honor my campaign’s legacy. VOTE FOR BARRY!” or something to that effect. And that Sisterhood of the Traveling Pantsuit comment? The Harriet Tubman rhetoric at the end? Killer. Love her right now.
And I will say, though the orange suit complemented Hill’s skin tone, I thought orange was an interesting choice for the patriotic overload that is a convention. With all the Obama campaign’s branding strategy, I thought it was odd that they allowed Hillary and Chelsea to appear next to each other wearing orange and black. Anyway, Michelle looked great, as per usual, and Joe Biden has really white teeth.
Stay tuned for Kathleen’s potentially more legit commentary, once she gets off the Pepsi Center floor. Lucky bitch.
P.S. I spoke to my mom before the speech, and she said she and my dad were also getting ready to watch. This shocked me a little, because my dad is a bit of a diehard Republican. My mom was talking about how they were kind of bashing Hillary on the teevee commentary and I was like whaaaa?, because I was watching NBC. Of course my parents were watching Fox, because my dad said it was “the most neutral station.” Tee hee.
P.P.S. I’m watching Fox now because I got curious, and Charles Krauthammer is speaking. Like a month ago I applied to be his research assistant. Never heard back, shockingly. It was one of those jobs that you just have to send in your resume for, so don’t judge me.
[Posted by Mallory]
six words to change the world. 
